The True Cost Of Today’s Price?
So, this is just a random coagulation of thoughts about price (and cost). These thoughts are not from an expert. They are from my addlepated monkey’s brain. They make no conclusions. I’m just as confused as the next chimp down the line. Here goes.
Why Are Dead Birds Falling From The Sky? (Hint: It’s Totally My Fault)
It is not coincidental that the name of my book is BLACKBIRDS and that many of the dead birds are also blackbirds (or, at least, birds that happen to be black of feather). Why is that, you ask? I’m totally the guy killing all those birds. I’m really glad to have that off my chest.
Drop The Pen, Grab A Hammer: Building The Writer’s Platform
When someone says “writer’s platform,” I cannot help but grind my molars together until I hear the crinkly, crunchy snap as my enamel cracks like punched glass. Still. As a buzzword, it’s got legs. And in the bullshit of the buzzword, truth lingers. Let us tease it out with a tickle.
You Are Now Entering The Month Of “What Now?”
There it is. The book. A brick. A big block of words and dead trees, or a garish white screen of 1s and 0s comprising your asstastic prose. Your gut sinks. Palms sweat. This thing? It might as well be a football helmet filled with diarrhea. It’s got nothing of value to offer to the world. It’s a tangled briar of gibberish.
Auld Lang Search Term Bingo
You know what time it is. It’s time to dip my ladle into the river of depravity, a river that draws miscreants and deviants to the shores of terribleminds, as ineluctable as the tides, as certain as my utter pantslessness. It’s for time for — *crash of thunder* *keening violin* *braying donkey* SEARCH TERM BINGO.
Welcome To The Bourbon School Of Bourbon
But one drinky-drink I’m not well-versed in is bourbon. Few times I’ve had it in the past I found it to be a lot harsher than Scotch — instead of smooth and warm we’re talking razors boiled in distilled water — but that tells me I’m just not drinking the right stuff.