Chuck Wendig: Terribleminds

Apple-Obsessed Author Fella

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Don’t Let Fifty Shades Of Grey Pee In Your Wheaties, Writer Types

At the news Fifty Shades of Grey author E.L. James was publishing a writing guide, I tweeted the following because I am at at least a little bit of a dick:

And it was a ha-ha-funny tweet admittedly tasting of the vinegar tang of sour grapes because E.L. James has sold an eye-bursting number of copies of her book. I think by now everyone on the planet has at least three copies even if they don’t realize it. In truth I laud James for her success — I mean, shit, it’s out there, it’s selling, who am I to say she doesn’t deserve it? The joke for me is that just because the book sold well doesn’t make it the watermark for good writing, and so — well, blah blah blah, I’m explaining the joke, which of course kills it.

Regardless! A few folks tweeted or commented that it’s horrible she sells so well and what chance do they have of getting published and life sucks and the publishing industry is a cabal of vampires and we’re all fucking doomed so fuck it and let’s all just cry into our pillows.

Stop that.

Stop that right now.

You’re looking at the wrong thing.

You’re saying, “This crap over here is popular and that’s bad.”

Who cares? Who gives a jiggling jar of koala cock about that? Crap is frequently popular. (See earlier joke: Ronald McDonald.) It takes nothing away from your work or your chance of producing that work either on your own or when working with a strong and friendly publisher.

That one series of books is a lone floater in a very big pool of water.

Lift your gaze.

Look at your bookshelves.

I look at my shelves, I see books from years past and from this year and I see books that haven’t even been published yet (’cause I’m lucky like that) and you know what? They’re incredible! Great authors are producing great content and publishers are fucking publishing it. Who cares about some other book series? Books don’t really compete against one another. The 70 jizzillion people who bought the Fifty Shades books weren’t likely to buy your books anyway and if they do, great, yay, confetti, applause, puppies, ponies and popsicles for all.

Nothing in those books takes anything away from you.

Keep writing. Eyes forward. The popular kids are always gonna do what the popular kids are always gonna do. It’s a big world. Lot of readers. An infinite Internet. Keep writing.

To conclude? A point made by a very wise man who would’ve been 61-years-old today:

DON’T PANIC.

Sans Comics

I’ve been enjoying the unholy hell out of some comics recently — just finished up the last trade of Locke & Key, still loving every weird and wonderful page of Saga, still hot for Cullen Bunn’s The Sixth Gun, and this week Marvel released an iOS app for their subscription service, described somewhat as a Spotify for their comics. (Basically: pay a monthly fee, get access to a giant archive of Marvel Comics, but nothing newer than six months old.)

Plus, I’m entertaining my own delusions of storytelling grandeur — I’m hoping that this might be the year I slide my parasitic tendrils into the gills of the unconquered industry and get to write a comic book or two or three OR THREE THOUSAND ahem I mean, what?

As such, I ask again for some recommendations.

What comics are you reading? Digging?

Not just Marvel and DC (though those count if you like ’em).

What else? Whatchoo got?

On The Subject Of The “Strong Female Character”

It’s International Women’s Day.

YAY WOMEN! WOO!

*applause*

*confetti*

*respect*

I’d like to say some things now from the perspective of a “writer with male parts,” and I’ll have you know that at first I hesitated to write this not because I was afraid of the response but because I am afraid I’d bungle it somehow. Sometimes people speak from a place of insensitivity without realizing it not because they are malicious but because they’re ignorant, and while I aim to dispel my ignorance at every given turn, sometimes we’re so damn deep in the mire of dumbshittery that it stops us from even seeing the ignorance in which we are trapped.

Just the same…

I figure to not say something because of fear is worse than saying something and accidentally coming across like a jackass. At least if I end up a jackass, I can be corrected, and we can all have a nice discussion. Ignorance sometimes must be dispelled by first putting it on display.

Anyway.

I’m a writer who, as noted, has dude parts.

I’m also a writer who writes a (here I’d like to add the description “fantabulous bestselling critically-acclaimed award-winning” but as yet I do not have the good fortune of such a language allowance) series of books about a character named Miriam Black.

Miriam is a character with lady parts.

As such, I get questions in interviews about me being a dude writing a lady and is that weird and what’s it like and so on and so forth. Further, I’ve read some criticism (sometimes reasonable, sometimes less so) that suggests that Miriam talks and acts like a man and so was clearly written by a man and a few have even gone on to suggest that men should not write women.

It’s surprising, in a sense, because to me Miriam was in some ways the embodiment of some of the tougher women I’ve met in my life and a refutation that female characters have to be particularly “feminine” — sure, Miriam has some aspects of me, though I don’t know they’re “male” aspects. She has some aspects of my wife, too, who is a foul-mouthed bad-ass who doesn’t put up with my shit or the shit of those around her.

Mockingbird carries the whole thing further, I think — most of the characters in that book are women, actually, as the book is predominantly set at a girl’s school.

Anyway, what happens then is I get that famous question:

What is a strong female character?

I never really know how to answer that question.

But, like I said, sometimes it’s worth talking and trying.

So, let me try.

A strong female character is a character who happens to be a woman or a girl.

“Strong” is not an adjective describing that character’s physical or emotional or intellectual strength. It is an adjective describing the potency and depth of the character — in the narrative, not moral sense. A strong character is complicated, flawed, compelling.

“Strong” is just a synonym here for “great.”

It’s tempting to say that the “female” part of that equation is incidental, and it is in the sense that it is not maleness or femaleness that creates this strength of character — or the “greatness,” if you dig that translation. But it’s also important to recognize that women have different experiences than men and to ignore those experiences is, I think, to do them a disservice by pretending those experiences don’t happen or don’t matter. The same difficulties women may have in the real world — the glass ceiling, the rape culture put forth by male oppression, a general lesser but no less significant culture of dismissal — can and sometimes should still be present in our fiction.

These female characters may be hampered and hamstrung not because they are women but because the society within the fiction treats women poorly — the “flaws” are external, not internal (though one presumes external pressure can eventually create internal flaws on the individual level, though when those flaws are translated to exist on the entire gender level we once more enter the realm of gender bias and, again, oppression).

Er, if that makes sense.

Sometimes in the discussion about strong female characters we hear those two words, “Bechdel Test,” which is a test to determine gender bias in a work of fiction by testing to see if the work has (a) more than two female characters who (b) have at least one conversation that (c) isn’t about men. It’s a rather incomplete way to check depth of character, however, not because the test is bad but because it’s far too limited and all too easy (checking those three boxes does little to create great female characters, in my opinion).

We must then ask, well, what? What do we do? As writers of any and all genital configurations?

Well, I dunno.

But I can hazard a guess.

I think you strive to write female characters as great as you would male characters. You make them as complex. As heroic. As flawed. As compelling. As powerful or as weak.

You do not ignore that they are girls or women.

Of course they can be flawed. They should be. Because great characters are.

But their flaws and complexities are not because they are women.

(Is “oh, it’s because she’s a woman” ever a good excuse to include any character aspect?)

You needn’t elevate them onto a pedestal.

You needn’t drop them into the pit.

You just need to make sure they and their experiences are represented. And fully-formed — not some caricature, not some cardboard cut-out, not some sex object or silly goose.

Women in this world, the real one, can do anything.

Make sure the women who populate your fictional worlds have that same opportunity.

Oh, and by the way, the same goes with writing any character of any persuasion: man, woman, gay, straight, black, white, Muslim, Christian, Republican, Democrat, transgender, fat, anorexic, and so on and so forth. Everybody has experiences bound to their culture (and where applicable, their choices) but their strengths and flaws needn’t be bound to who they are at the core.

Or something.

I’ve gone on too long, probably.

Anyway, Happy International Women’s Day.

Don’t let anyone marginalize you. I aim to teach my son of your awesomeness.

*high-five*

(For a far more powerful and eloquent look at this subject, please click forth and behold Greg Rucka’s post about “Why I Write Strong Female Characters.”)

 

America’s Hot Moist Land-Wang, Here I Come

I should probably take care with naming my blog posts.

Oh well.

SO IT IS OFFICIAL.

I am making my way to Florida April 13th through the 16th.

Flying to Fort Lauderdale, visiting Miami and the Keys, and then fleeing the moist, tacky heat and ocean-fed breeze in order to return to the woodland embrace of Pennsylvania.

As noted the other day, I am thinking of doing a kind of ninja book signing / Q&A / hangout / breakfast-or-booze thing while down there.

Some folks expressed interest! Which is good. Because otherwise you’re going to make me drink alone and sign books for myself, which is probably the epitome of sad (BUT SCREW IT I’LL DO IT). I feel like doing it that Saturday (the 13th) makes the most sense, since, well, it’s a Saturday. That’s the day I get in, but I arrive early thanks to a direct flight.

Probably need to start thinking about, y’know, where this will happen. A park? A bar? A mall? Inside a shark tank? On a cocaine-filled speedboat as we escape the po-po?

But seriously: any ideas as to where to go in and around Miami or Ft. Lauderdale?

Ideally somewhere where we can eat and drink and talk. AND KILL.

I mean, not that last part.

Lemme know too if you think you’re down with the ninja-author-hangout.

Flash Fiction Challenge: Choose Your Random Sentence

Last week’s challenge: “Super-Ultra-Mega Game of Aspects.”

I’m kind of in love with this random sentence generator.

You are going to love it too.

I SAID YOU ARE GOING TO LOVE IT TOO

*points crossbow at your face*

Ahem.

Seriously, it creates a kind of… insane poetry.

So —

Go click the link to the random sentence generator.

Get a random sentence.

It’s okay if you have to reclick a few times.

Let’s say, upwards of ten reclicks.

Choose one of those ten sentences.

And use that sentence in a piece of flash fiction up to 1000 words long. See? Super easy.

Let us know what your sentence is before you write because, hey, it’s fun.

You’ve got one week, as usual. Finish your tale by Friday, March 15th, at noon EST. Publish at your online space and link back here so we can all check it out. Dig? Dug.

Get writing, word-nerds.

A One-Two Punch Cover Reveal: Blue Blazes and Gods & Monsters

And so, I give you, a glorious pair of covers.

Gods & Monsters: Unclean Spirits is out 5/2.

The Blue Blazes drops 5/28.

Not that I want to play favorites but, c’mon, The Blue Blazes cover is by the inimitable Joey Hi-fi, who did the covers to Blackbirds and Mockingbird! Once again I won the cover lottery here. The Founding Fields also has a brief Q&A with me about the book and the cover.

The (also awesome) cover of Gods & Monsters is by Clint Langley!

Both are available for pre-order now.

Gods & Monsters is about how the gods of all the pantheons have been exiled to earth, and how one man seeks his vengeance for the ills they’ve laid upon him and his family. (Features: Aphrodite! The Throne of Heaven! Coyote’s Penis! Cernunnos! And so much more!)

The Blue Blazes is about the one man standing at the intersection between the criminal Underworld and the mythic, monster-filled Underworld and what happens when his own daughter rises up to oppose him. (Features: Goblins! Golems! Snakefaces! Worm-Gods! Goat-Men! Sandhogs! Roller Derby Girl Gangs! Charcuterie! All underneath the island of Manhattan!)

Hope you like the covers.

(click them to see full-size)