Email: “Hey, Chuck, what do you think about meninists?”

Chuck: “They seem nice enough.”

Email: “What?!”

Chuck: “They’re always polite. Never say a nasty word to anybody. They’re not as hardcore as the Amish? Like, I think they can drive cars and use technology. But like the Amish, they build great sheds –”

Email: “Do you mean Mennonites?”

Chuck “…”

Email: “You mean Mennonites.”

Chuck: *clears throat* “I probably mean Mennonites. Yes. Yeah. Wait. So What are you talking about?”

Email: “Well, there’s this group out there of men –”

Chuck: “Oh, that’s never good.”

Email: “– and mostly it seems like a grab-bag of your MRA types who want to make fun of feminism and just generally be dicks to women –”

Chuck: “Somebody out there is already going to bring up that ‘dick’ is a gendered insult and it is hurtful to men.”

Email: “Probably.”

Chuck: “Then again, maybe men should just toughen the fuck up about it and if they didn’t want dick to be an insult, maybe they should stop trying to thrust themselves — literally and figuratively — into subjects and situations that have nothing to do with them and want no part of them. Anyway. Continue.”

Email: “That’s pretty much it. They kinda did exactly that — the ‘thrusting themselves into’ thing — with this #LikeAGirl meme campaign based on an Always ad that ran during the Super Bowl. The goal of the ad being to change the connotation around that phrase — Like a girl — and spin it into something positive.”

Chuck: “That sounds nice. I’m assuming these meninists shit-shellacked it all up. Like a pair of toddler underoos spackled with mess.”

Email: “Yeah, no, pretty much. They had their own hashtag — #LikeABoy — and also a lot of jerky lackwits trolled the #LikeAGirl hashtag and, as they are wont to do, were poopy butts about it to women.”

Chuck: “So, you want to know my thoughts.”

Email: “I guess? Like, there’s a subset of meninists who claim to be feminist, and that’s just ‘their word’ for being a male feminist, but for the most part, it seems to have been co-opted by a loud and noisy group that hates feminism or thinks it has somehow been victimized by feminism.”

Chuck: “Men who think they’ve been victimized by feminism are like burglars who sue the homeowners they were burgling because they stubbed their toe on a fucking coffee table. Listen, you probably already know my thoughts on this. Meninism is not a thing. It’s just some shitty meme by troll dudes who feel somehow spurned, or who smell the shift in power coming and like fish dying on a beach after the water has receded, are flopping about and gasping for air. As I’ve noted before, any disparities or issues that primarily affect men are real and need to be dealt with, but these aren’t the groups dealing with them. These are the groups responsible for their own misery. A lot of men’s rights are actually also women’s rights, and the toxic dudebro testosterone culture harms itself more than any woman or group of women ever could. Men who are feminists are just feminists. They’re not ‘equalists‘ or ‘egalitarians.’ They’re certainly not meninists, which is, again, not a thing. It’s just gulls squawking. Mammals shrieking because they don’t have thumbs and can’t pick up that stick to scratch their itchy backs. It’s all very silly. If you’re going to do anything with meninists: ignore them, or openly mock them. Do not give them the podium, though, because anybody who identifies as that is not interested in having a proper goddamn discussion. Taser them and keep walking.”

Email: “Fair enough.”

Chuck: “If anybody’s going to be upset about any commercials from the Super Bowl, try being mad at Nationwide for that dead kid commercial. HEY, YOU SURE GOT A NICE KID THERE, Nationwide said. I SURE HOPE NOTHING HAPPENS TO IT. As they slide an insurance policy across the table.