Category: The Ramble

  • A Bonus Round Of Search Term Bingo

    Time again for SEARCH TERM BINGO, little babies. If you don’t know how this works, here it is: people discover this website via some of the strangest search terms one could imagine. I pluck these search terms out of obscurity and dissect them for gits and shiggles.

  • Throw Your Links In The Ol’ Link Dump

    Man, since doing away with a regular edition of Painting With Shotguns (originally mistyped as “Painting With Shoguns,” which is my cable access show wherein I learn how to paint from an ancient Japanese shogun who has been displaced in the timestream), I no longer get to just barf up a bunch of Internet links into your lap.

  • It Goes Down Smooth: The Shackleton’s Scotch Flash Fiction Results

    The other day, I said: “Hey, you. That’s right. You. It’s time to write a flash fiction challenge based on Shackleton’s Scotch.” And somewhere in the neighborhood of 30 of you crazy motherfookers tossed your flash fiction down on the stage and were like, “BOOM goes the dynamite.”

  • The Plutarchy Cometh

    If the middle class is a big balloon, it’s like someone untied the balloon knot and know the thing is slowly but surely leaking air, sputtering around the room like a cartoon dirigible. I feel like we’re living in truly absurd times. Times that, were you to read about them in a book, you’d say, “Oh! This is satire.”

  • Human Google Makes Twitter Chili

    On the other hand, when I turn to Twitter and I say, “Hello, excellent humans of Twitter, please bequeath unto me the essential ingredients to chili,” I get a flood of great answers. What did I learn? Well, I learned that chili recipes are as individual as the people who make it.

  • Worldbuilding Is A Kind Of Masturbation

    In terms of doing any prep-work for your story, it behooves you to first conceive of the story you want to tell at all levels of complexity (from the barest level of boy meets girl to the more complex outline, treatment or synopsis) and then use the world to prop up your story. Worldbuilding should be a slave to storytelling, not vice versa.