Last week’s challenge: “Doing The Subgenre Twist”
This week —
You’ve got 1000 words to write about bad parents.
Whatever that means to you? Write it down into a story.
Any genre will do.
Write the story at your blog, drop a link in the comments here so we can read it.
And that’s it.
Due by Friday, July 4th, at noon EST.
Mark Gardner says:
Man, I’m at work for another two hours. I can’t wait to write this.
June 27, 2014 — 4:02 PM
Mark Gardner says:
This one got away from me. Still under the 1000 word limit though.
http://article94.wordpress.com/2014/06/27/justice/
June 27, 2014 — 8:17 PM
colinjkeats says:
Probably got away because you had something inside you wanted to get out. Well done!
June 28, 2014 — 10:14 PM
fadedglories says:
There’s lots of meat in this one, it seems to come from deep inside you. I think the shortness of the story increases it’s impact. This is damn good writing.
June 30, 2014 — 3:04 AM
Mr Urban Spaceman says:
I couldn’t decide on one story, so I wrote eight.
http://mrurbanspaceman.wordpress.com/2014/06/27/i-had-bad-parents/
June 27, 2014 — 4:17 PM
Mark Gardner says:
Great take on thus weeks flash fiction challenge!
June 27, 2014 — 9:25 PM
extremelyirrelevant says:
I like how you understate having written eight stories ! Good one !
June 28, 2014 — 2:02 PM
Allison Maruska says:
Love your take on this!
June 29, 2014 — 9:59 AM
Pavowski says:
Oh boy, oh boy. Gonna try not to make this one personal.
June 27, 2014 — 4:54 PM
Pavowski says:
I struggled with this one because my parents are actually pretty good ones by virtually every yardstick I have by which to measure them. And, you write what you know, right? So I was stuck. I thought about writing to the news of the week, with the guy who essentially cooked his kid alive in a car, but the thought of getting inside a mind like that turned my stomach. Then I remembered this story which was told to me by a sweet old lady at the mall while we were chatting about my boy about a week ago.
So I decided to steal it and spruce it up.
I don’t feel there’s a whole lot of artfulness in this story, but it does make my blood boil.
Here’s “Just a Sec, Ty”: http://pavorisms.wordpress.com/2014/06/30/just-a-sec-ty/
June 30, 2014 — 7:07 AM
JP Juniper says:
Ow. Ow, ow, ow. I’ve met a few Tys lately, and this couldn’t ring more true or feel more like a punch in the heart. Ow.
June 30, 2014 — 10:31 AM
fadedglories says:
You did more than spruce it up, you invented a great little hero in Ty.
He comes across as the kind of kid who can survive any amount of negligent parenting and he’ll grow up to be a Super-hero or a Writer!
June 30, 2014 — 11:02 AM
JP Juniper says:
Mashing up Poe and Tregillis and bits of my own sordid educational history… ran a little long.
http://www.jpjuniper.com/stories/2014/6/27/beneath-one-wall-inside-another
June 27, 2014 — 6:20 PM
colinjkeats says:
love your stuff. can’t seem to find a way to follow your blog, though,and I am not on Twitter yet.
June 28, 2014 — 10:11 PM
JP Juniper says:
Thank you!
There’s an rss feed that’s linked on the “about” page, and is hidden in the stories page’s header: http://www.jpjuniper.com/stories?format=rss … I don’t see a way to make it more prominent, at least not with the template I’m using (squarespace is lovely in many ways, but you pay for the performance and convenience with a lack of flexibility compared to running your own WP site) (still, I would pick SS over WP 99 times out of 100).
June 29, 2014 — 11:16 AM
colinjkeats says:
Hmm I must be blog illiterate. When I click on the feed it comes up with ages of html.
June 30, 2014 — 1:48 AM
fadedglories says:
This seems like a twisted version of X Men and it’s a great idea. Binyamin is a sympathetic character and I’d love to know what subject he’s teaching. Thanks for sharing this one.
June 30, 2014 — 3:14 AM
JP Juniper says:
Pretty sure his area of expertise would have to be Geology. 🙂 (And thank you!)
June 30, 2014 — 10:23 AM
Angela Cavanaugh says:
This one might take some thought. The idea of “bad parents” is so subjective. It’ll be interesting to see the various extremes of people’s experience that they bring to thier writing. I know it hits home for me.
June 27, 2014 — 6:56 PM
chriswhitewrites says:
Here’s mine for this week, No Such Thing, although it only features one bad parent, and is strictly not autobiographical, although I wish it was…
June 27, 2014 — 7:23 PM
Mark Gardner says:
I wish it were autobiographical too!
June 27, 2014 — 9:25 PM
chriswhitewrites says:
So do I!
June 27, 2014 — 10:24 PM
chriswhitewrites says:
As do I, Mark…as do I!
June 27, 2014 — 10:32 PM
Suzie says:
Really interesting story — love that you took the idea and went somewhere completely different with it.
June 28, 2014 — 8:12 AM
colinjkeats says:
Liked it a lot. Image and Imagery great!
June 28, 2014 — 10:19 PM
Kurt Bali says:
Went a little over the 1000 words, but I think it was worth it. http://sixgunwizard.blogspot.com/2014/06/a-mothers-love.html
June 27, 2014 — 7:25 PM
fadedglories says:
Jenny is a wonderful character, a real super-mom. She should have a whole novel devoted to her, but I think Thomas will need to grow some balls to survive.
June 30, 2014 — 2:39 AM
Kurt Bali says:
Thanks for the feedback! Jenny’s character and deeds just sprung from my keyboard in one of those great moments of inspiration. I made Thomas a bit on the needy side because I really wanted to show the huge dichotomy between he and his mother and show how “normal” he is and how utterly not-normal his mother is. At the same time, I wanted Thomas’ views of his mother to be the kind of worship one has for their mother at that age, especially one who goes to any length to protect her son. I may re-visit this world again due to the feedback I’ve received.
June 30, 2014 — 1:22 PM
Ciaran Quaid says:
Had an interesting time writing this! Critiques are appreciated!
http://ceaselessevolution.wordpress.com/2014/06/27/flash-fiction-challenge-bad-parents/
June 27, 2014 — 9:24 PM
colinjkeats says:
Told from an interesting point of view,and provided perspective on a few different levels. Good job!
June 28, 2014 — 10:23 PM
fadedglories says:
I’m not sure whether your character deserves pity, she doesn’t seem entirely heartless but we don’t really learn a lot about her ‘badness’.
I like your idea a lot and you have some good stuff in there but this mother is a bit equivocal, maybe she’s nicer than she ought to be.
June 30, 2014 — 2:55 AM
Helen Espinosa says:
This just might be the dark side of me… Anyway, it’s exactly 1,000 words.
https://helenespinosa.wordpress.com/2014/06/27/the-day-my-family-fell-apart/
June 27, 2014 — 11:22 PM
fadedglories says:
Chilling.
June 30, 2014 — 10:12 AM
Mozette says:
You gotta ask the question: exactly who are worse? The rich or the poor?
http://youcantgoback-andotherimpossibilities.blogspot.com.au/2014/06/poor-little-rich-girl.html
June 28, 2014 — 2:38 AM
Mark Gardner says:
Creepy. Oh wait, Mozette wrote it? Standard fare for her. When you gonna put out a novel length horror story?
June 28, 2014 — 1:29 PM
Mozette says:
I’m working on it… I’m working on it…. 😀
June 29, 2014 — 12:21 AM
colinjkeats says:
Rich or poor, we all must eat! 😉 Creepy is right, but in a good way.
June 28, 2014 — 10:29 PM
fadedglories says:
Nice people, country folk I’m guessing? It’s a good tale, nicely told, with just a touch of relish.
June 30, 2014 — 10:18 AM
Mozette says:
Thank you guys for your great comments! I really appreciate it!
Actually I’m looking at getting some of the ‘greatest hits’ of my flash fiction and putting out an e-book and a proper paperback for all to get creeped out by… 😀 what do you think?
July 3, 2014 — 11:28 PM
Gry Ranfelt says:
This is a good one! By FREUD do we all have parent issues, eh, eh? Something we blame them for.
Roger, sir, I shall take you up on this. *Salutes and jumps into water*
June 28, 2014 — 2:49 AM
Alex says:
Ooh, this one touched a nerve.
http://justafeverdream.wordpress.com/2014/06/28/deals-with-the-devil/
June 28, 2014 — 6:49 AM
Suzie says:
Brilliant and scary story. Could easily see it becoming a reality :/
June 28, 2014 — 11:01 AM
Alex says:
Thanks Suzie :). I’m so glad I’ve done my procreating already!
June 29, 2014 — 5:25 AM
fadedglories says:
Thanks Alex, you really involved me with this story. It’s powerful and real. The subject matter makes me admire the telling, it’s restrained which gives it greater impact.
June 30, 2014 — 11:05 AM
Alex says:
Thank you :). Glad you enjoyed it!
July 1, 2014 — 8:21 AM
Allison Maruska says:
Nice job! I can see this turning into a novel where the characters rebel somehow.
July 1, 2014 — 10:11 PM
Alex says:
Thanks :). Writing that would be cathartic, at the moment!
July 4, 2014 — 10:41 AM
Suzie says:
Here’s my offering ‘No trouble’. http://suziehunt.co.uk/fiction/flash-fiction/no-trouble
Much easier than last weeks challenge, which I didn’t complete!
June 28, 2014 — 11:04 AM
JP Juniper says:
This is so well done. You manage to conjure such tension and emotion out of a chicken dinner. Just marvelous.
June 28, 2014 — 7:59 PM
Suzie says:
Thank you!
June 29, 2014 — 1:05 PM
colinjkeats says:
Evokes ‘Mommy dearest’!
June 28, 2014 — 10:36 PM
Pavowski says:
I recognize that mom. Not MY mom, but I recognize her. And by extension, I recognize that daughter too. Nice job capturing that intractable relationship.
June 30, 2014 — 7:45 AM
fadedglories says:
You write Good stories Suzie.
Anyone who’s spent time with elderly relatives can relate to this one. I was hoping that the worm might turn, but it’s still a strong story.
June 30, 2014 — 10:39 AM
paulbevanwriter says:
Never done one of these before…but here goes. My 800 or so words: “PAY ATTENTION”.
I hope you like it.
http://paulbevanwriter.wordpress.com/2014/06/28/bad-parents-flash-fiction/
June 28, 2014 — 1:15 PM
colinjkeats says:
Hi Paul, if this is a first effort for one of these for you, well done. Your dialogue is very believable. If you don’t mind some constructive criticism (which is the point of these exercises I think) I have some comments. All only my own opinion as a reader, of course, with the caveat that I have not even self-published, am not an editor or anything other than a starting-off writer. Please take with the appropriate grains of salt.
This might be a typo (or a blog glitch as I have had lines disappear when cut and pasted into my blog space):
but for this line: “…he said, loud enough that it made him.”
Made him what??
Another suggestion: instead of saying “David was her brother.” although there is nothing wrong with it, it reads like a narrator aside and jolted me back to reality and knowing this is a story I am reading. Maybe try putting it into the next line of dialogue. something like:
“She could always move in with David,” he said.
“C’mon,You know my brother has the dog.”
The story itself was a little predictable. I personally would have liked to have more buildup focusing on the daughter (maybe have the daughter being disabled in some way, which makes the parents even worse at the end) and perhaps some foreshadowing, either using the TV show, or having a stranger make an innocous and kind comment about their lovely daughter, giving the possibility that he/she was the ones that took her.
I also wanted more frantic intensity in the last lines when they discover she is gone. You had 200 more words you could have used there.
Keep it up!
June 29, 2014 — 12:00 PM
fadedglories says:
This is a story parents can relate to. I hope it had a happy ending so they could feel guilty and get over it, even change their ways, but maybe it didn’t end nice. You leave it to the reader to mull that over and that is good writing. Thanks, I enjoyed it.
June 30, 2014 — 10:45 AM
extremelyirrelevant says:
Thank you Chuck for this opportunity. Here’s my take on Bad Parents http://extremelyirrelevant.wordpress.com/2014/06/28/bad-parents/
June 28, 2014 — 1:30 PM
vshyacinthe says:
http://habitualclarity.wordpress.com/2014/06/28/jess/
Here’s my take. Sort of a journal entry style. Hope you enjoy!
June 28, 2014 — 3:58 PM
LindaGHill says:
Inspiring prompt – the idea for this came to me immediately: http://lindaghillfiction.wordpress.com/2014/06/28/out-of-the-frying-pan-flash-fiction-challenge-bad-parents/
June 28, 2014 — 4:45 PM
Hope Floats says:
Ooooh…I found this by following Linda. I wanted to participate in this one but it was “too close to home” I did write a non-fiction post on the topic though and found it brutally painful. Thank you. No pain no gain right? Great topic and some really great entries as well.
June 28, 2014 — 6:18 PM
Vee M. says:
This is my first time doing one of these. I’d appreciate some feedback and if you guys wouldn’t mind checking out my blog. Thanks! http://vanessamedina024.wix.com/the-story-builder#!Unwanted/cmbz/CDF41A6D-66F0-4360-AC4A-1BEC68E8678D
June 28, 2014 — 9:14 PM
colinjkeats says:
Hi Vee,
The premise for your story is good- almost a replay of Cinderella. If you don’t mind a suggestion or two, (with the usual caveat that this is just my personal opinion) I would say come at the whole story a different way. The style is too much telling and narration, not enough showing and hinting. Don’t do the whole set up of “From the start I knew …” Start with the trip to grandmas-emphasize the lovely time the girl is having, how much her sisters love her, build descriptions of them and her perfect parents into that lovely time at the beach, and then have her world turned upside down when she overhear the dialogue. Include a descripton of the main character showing her differences in that piece also, perhaps. Spend more time on her actions after that episode – I’m sure you can imagine some things one might do other than simply throwing oneself on the bed and sobbing. Spend more time on the reveal by the mother contrasting her beauty with her cruelty and indifference . Build some tension there so that the ending creates more emotion in the reader. And I would leave off the last line it is unnecessary. “Welcome home” says it all and if you ever decide to expand the story you can have many avenues to go.
Hope you take the comments in the spirit in which they are given. I would love to see the re-write on this!
June 29, 2014 — 12:19 PM
colinjkeats says:
Hmm, funny I had just written this, and although it is not about parents being intentionally bad, it is personal, in memoir style and is about my parents. Probably not a good fit here but I’ll plug it in anyway. If I have time this weekend I might try something fictional also.
http://colinjkeats.wordpress.com/2014/06/27/the-sins-of-the-father/
June 28, 2014 — 10:04 PM
Allison Maruska says:
I almost didn’t do this one, but came up with something that maybe works with 200 words to spare.
http://allisonmaruska.com/2014/06/28/flash-fiction-challenge-bad-parents/
June 29, 2014 — 1:27 AM
veemedina says:
Hey all I wrote on this subject as well on my blog. Come check it out and please leave some feedback. I’m just starting out, Thanks! http://thestorybuilder.wordpress.com/
June 29, 2014 — 1:35 AM
fadedglories says:
Just over the 800 words for my story of the struggle not to be a bad mother.
http://nanowrimoroman.blogspot.co.uk/?zx=150ca84e34a3e05e
Please tell me what you think. I really appreciate your comments
June 29, 2014 — 12:41 PM
Penny Tyler says:
I couldn’t keep anything about my bad parents under 10,000 words–so this is for anyone who thinks they have Writer’s Block…
http://pennytyler.com/2014/06/writers-block/
June 29, 2014 — 1:40 PM
extremelyirrelevant says:
It’s funny coz it’s sad
June 29, 2014 — 11:28 PM
Penny Tyler says:
Thanks Ex, The trick is to learn from it and move on 🙂
June 30, 2014 — 7:49 AM
Mari says:
I chose to focus on my own culture (Japanese) and explore the nuances of what is “a bad parent.” Reactions and/or feedback are welcome.
http://ghostsinthemachines.wordpress.com/2014/06/29/out-of-love/
June 29, 2014 — 2:29 PM
fadedglories says:
You evoke the scene on the beach brilliantly. I felt as if I was standing there watching. I don’t think you need the epilogue, it detracts from the impact of the story. Thank you for sharing, I loved it.
June 30, 2014 — 10:56 AM
Mari says:
Thank you very much – I had the same since about the epilogue. I appreciate the feedback.
June 30, 2014 — 11:29 PM
fadedglories says:
Thanks Alex, you really involved me with this story. It’s powerful and real. The subject matter makes me admire the telling, it’s restrained which gives it greater impact.
June 30, 2014 — 10:34 AM
fadedglories says:
This ended up in the wrong place. It’s a response to Alex’s story.
June 30, 2014 — 11:04 AM
adderob says:
Have never been to the site before, and reading some of Chuck’s posts inspired me to jump in on this. My blog is fairly new and not very fancy (I am a web developer, just bought my own web space to work on some personal projects that I keep procrastinating…), but below is the link to the story I wrote for this. It came out to exactly 1,000 words, which is kind of cool and was not intended.
Enjoy!
http://octivium.com/blogtivium/oh-father/
June 30, 2014 — 12:27 PM
fadedglories says:
I certainly did enjoy your story. It’s the kind you have to read twice to get all the detail, smiling as you read it again. I think it’s a great slant and mebbe it’s accurate too.
July 1, 2014 — 2:40 AM
adderob says:
I appreciate the feedback! My wife woke me up from sleep to tell me something similar, which was kind of cool of her. I am still working on editing and publishing 114,000 words, so doing this was a nice and challenging change of pace.
July 1, 2014 — 7:37 PM
litbandit says:
A little greek twist
http://literarybandit.wordpress.com/2014/06/30/bad-parents/
June 30, 2014 — 1:14 PM
StaceyHH says:
http://bumblebeesflight.com/2014/07/01/exactly-half-way/
Thank you for the challenge, it was strangely cathartic.
July 1, 2014 — 2:06 PM
Megan says:
I’ve been enjoying the blog and reading everyone else’s challenges the past couple weeks so I thought I’d add my own word-nerdery to the bunch this time. Thanks! I had fun with it.
http://meganandblog.wordpress.com/2014/07/01/bad-parents-flash-fiction/
July 2, 2014 — 3:16 AM
Free Jack Klugman says:
I don’t have much experience with bad parents (mine are wonderful), so instead I went with the story of a boy whose parents are bad, but not necessary at parenting. Here’s the result:
http://www.freejackklugman.com/shorts/vacation-bells
Enjoy!
July 2, 2014 — 9:40 PM
antipelican says:
Interesting take! I thought his parents were kind of awesome. I’d love to know what happened to the poor boy – did someone find him, or did he just sit in the car forever? Cos that would be sad. 🙁
July 3, 2014 — 6:15 AM
Tom Reed says:
A new blog from an old (sometimes) participator. I hope it works. I hope people like. And I hope there is bacon (I really hope for this last part).
http://reed.svbtle.com/lucky
July 3, 2014 — 12:38 AM
antipelican says:
Soooo…not sure how successful I was at this, but I took this challenge as an opportunity to expand a little on the universe I’ve created for the novel I’m currently working on. Poor Rollo not only has bad parents, but a very unfortunate phobia.
http://booksishouldhavereadalongtimeago.wordpress.com/other-stuff/flash-fiction/an-unfortunate-fear/
July 3, 2014 — 6:13 AM
Jemima Pett says:
Apologies to anyone expecting my usual wit and strangeness this month – I’m doing Camp NaNoWriMo and turning all those short pieces about Big Pete and the Swede, orichalcum asteroid miners, into a full-length book.
Thank you Chuck, for helping me discover orichalcum and my characters 🙂
July 3, 2014 — 4:23 PM
vlazabal6981 says:
This story was cathartic in a sad, strange way. http://veronikalazabal.com/2014/07/03/gulliver/
July 3, 2014 — 6:19 PM
Topher Ryals says:
This is the first thing I’ve written in a while. Looking forward to any and all feedback!
July 3, 2014 — 10:14 PM
momdude says:
After pondering for a while, I decided that parents who use their kids as pawns and weapons in a contentious divorce are really, really bad parents.
http://pauljwillett.com/2014/07/03/flash-fiction-center-seat-coach-class/
July 4, 2014 — 1:55 AM
J. C. McKenna says:
Been a while since I’ve done of of these.
“Tanya and Jerry Get Away”
http://jcmckenna.com/?p=365
Jerry’s rant about never saying no is one of those “things I wish I’d said” years ago when a neighbor kid threw a rock at my daughter’s head. The mom gave me most of that excuse word for word when I asked why she didn’t stop him when she saw it happening.
Other than that, decided to have a little fun with it.
July 4, 2014 — 6:04 AM
Dana Alyce-Schwarz says:
Not much to say on this one. “Parentis Draconis”
http://contrastsolution.blogspot.com/2014/07/parentis-draconis.html
July 4, 2014 — 9:58 AM