Last week’s challenge: “The Last Line Of A Story”
Holy crap, people. Over three-hundred entries in last week’s challenge.
This is going to be a hard one.
Some of you are out of the running — if you enter multiple times, I mostly discount your entries because you put me into a kind of choice paralysis. Plus, you get lots of the dead bodies, bullets, revenge variety — some of this stuff starts to feel very samey-samey. (Oh, and more than a few of you have a very liberal interpretation of a “last line” of a story.)
That being said, still, so many good options.
So, this is the five I’ve picked:
m3nace: “If it wasn’t for the inflation the devil could have bribed them.”
Lani Gerbi: “And then, being mindful not to spill my tea, I eased into the tartan embrace of Endolyn Muirden’s least offensive armchair, and settled back to watch him die.”
Ben Dodge: “The old man lying in the hold died three minutes later.”
Marlanesque: “She closed the book and watched as it turned to dust.”
Ryan Viergutz: “Cristobal climbed the ladder of arteries to the first universe that looked like it held more wonders and mysteries than the last.”
Squishy: “That plan didn’t fly, superhero, and now we’re short a bazooka.”
Josh Roby: “Once upon a time, there was a story so short, it was only a single line.”
lverawrites: “Life was easier before killing all the rabbits.”
David: “They never did find the orangutan.”
Damien Kelly: “Truth be told, I’m not sure any of them are actually dead.”
You’ll note that I’ve chosen ten there.
If you’re one of the lines picked, email me at: terribleminds at gmail dot com.
You will receive some manner of digital goodies.
NOW, for this week’s challenge —
You think it’s going to be, “Pick one of these last lines and using it as a last line in your story.”
BZZT.
Nope.
I want you to pick one of these last lines and use it as the first opening line in your story.
You’ve got up to 1000 words.
Write your tale. Post at your online space. Link back here.
Due by next Friday. July 19th. Noon EST.
Jim Franklin says:
I think I’m going to have to take…
Squishy: “That plan didn’t fly, superhero, and now we’re short a bazooka.”
Looks way too tempting for me to avoid.
July 12, 2013 — 12:38 PM
Jim Franklin says:
Well, here it is. A story of idiots and giant alien robots… The Brothers Dim
http://www.thezombiechimp.com/2013/07/14/flash-fiction-the-brothers-dim/
Hope you like it.
July 14, 2013 — 12:27 PM
Alecia Miller says:
This one had me chuckling. The brothers remind me of a couple of folks I know…
July 15, 2013 — 2:01 PM
alexanderthesoso says:
bonus points for using one of the OTHER ones as the ending line?
July 12, 2013 — 1:04 PM
D. W. Coventry (@DWCoventry) says:
And boom:
https://david-coventry.squarespace.com/fiction/2013/7/12/they-never-did-find-the-orangutan
July 12, 2013 — 1:25 PM
Brian says:
That was bold, but I really liked it. Nice write.
July 12, 2013 — 2:26 PM
D. W. Coventry (@DWCoventry) says:
Thanks Brian. I actually had a leg-up on this one. I was standing in line at a writer’s conference yesterday and started to joke with the guy next to me about what would be the worst pitch of the conference. We came up with “A unicorn is trying to assassinate the president and only a monkey disguised as an FBI agent can stop her”.
July 12, 2013 — 3:34 PM
Mr Urban Spaceman says:
Haha, very good! Loved the tongue in cheek humour of it all. You did much better with this line than I could have done.
July 12, 2013 — 3:16 PM
D. W. Coventry (@DWCoventry) says:
Thanks Senor Spaceman. I liked what you did on your blog as well.
July 12, 2013 — 3:34 PM
jdsfiction says:
That’s effing brilliant, dude! I love this story. Great job with the challenge line! 🙂
July 12, 2013 — 11:07 PM
D. W. Coventry (@DWCoventry) says:
Thanks man. Yours is great stuff as well. I’d love to see at least a few more thousand words with that version of Old Scratch as the MC.
July 12, 2013 — 11:23 PM
Alecia Miller says:
Excellent job on this one. I love the allusion to the Coen brothers, Bewitched, and Sit Terry Pratchett all rolled into one story!
July 15, 2013 — 8:44 PM
thesexiestwriter says:
Marlanesque “She closed the book and watched as it turned to dust.”
This one came out quick, but I guess that’s what flash fiction is supposed to be. My last flash fiction came out way too long, I got this one in at under 600 words.
http://criticalsexualmass.wordpress.com/
July 12, 2013 — 1:45 PM
Rick Cook Jr says:
Right now I’m feeling “Truth be told, I’m not sure any of them are actually dead.” but I may change my mind later.
July 12, 2013 — 1:58 PM
jdsfiction says:
“If it wasn’t for the inflation the Devil could have bribed them.”
Sounds like a winning ticket to me! I’ll be back with: Hot Off the Press
July 12, 2013 — 2:18 PM
jdsfiction says:
Came up with a strange slice of comedy. Enjoy. 🙂
http://jdsfiction.wordpress.com/2013/07/12/flash-fiction-friday/
July 12, 2013 — 9:26 PM
m3nace says:
Hah, awesome!
July 14, 2013 — 6:28 PM
jdsfiction says:
Glad you liked it! 🙂
And thanks for giving up the line to use, man!
July 14, 2013 — 10:40 PM
Mr Urban Spaceman says:
“She closed the book and watched as it turned to dust.”
None of the lines really spoke to me, but I did have something in mind which I tweaked for this line.
Sullivan’s Ark: http://mrurbanspaceman.wordpress.com/2013/07/12/sullivans-ark-flash-fiction-piece/
July 12, 2013 — 3:11 PM
thesexiestwriter says:
I really liked this. I’m not a huge sci fi guy but this got my interest. Reminded me of Foundation to some degree, except instead of colonies in a galaxy, this was colonies on a planet. Very engaging!
July 12, 2013 — 4:17 PM
Mr Urban Spaceman says:
Thank you!
July 12, 2013 — 6:22 PM
Wanderer says:
Only because I love snark. “That plan didn’t fly, superhero, and now we’re short a bazooka.”
http://secondstaronther.wordpress.com/2013/07/12/a-cog-in-the-machine/
July 12, 2013 — 5:04 PM
Matt jackson says:
I selected “That plan didn’t fly, superhero, and now we’re short a bazooka.” though I tweaked the line slightly.
http://www.msjx.org/2013/07/flash-fictoin-all-i-have-to-do-is-run.html
July 12, 2013 — 5:30 PM
m.s. jackson says:
Not sure what happened but my post disappeared. Here is my entry, my apologies to Squishy, I thought that was a character SAYING the line, not the person who submitted it. Sorry dude! 😉
http://www.msjx.org/2013/07/flash-fictoin-all-i-have-to-do-is-run.html
July 12, 2013 — 7:33 PM
jdsfiction says:
Great stuff man! I dig the narrative style. Thanks for sharing, I had fun with it. Keep up the wordsmithing, man. 🙂
July 13, 2013 — 12:05 AM
m.s. jackson says:
Thanks! I started and it just sort of flowed. Looking back I can see lots of typos and tense problems….but those are for editors to fix right? 🙂
July 13, 2013 — 12:26 AM
jdsfiction says:
Haha, true enough. Editing is my least favorite part.
July 13, 2013 — 12:28 AM
definitelynotapoet says:
Loved “And then, being mindful not to spill my tea, I eased into the tartan embrace of Endolyn Muirden’s least offensive armchair, and settled back to watch him die.” so decided to give it a shot.
http://definitelynotapoet.wordpress.com/2013/07/13/endolyn-muirdens-armchair-flash-fiction-challenge/
As you might have guessed, flash fiction is not my usual writing style.
July 12, 2013 — 8:34 PM
Jackie says:
The rabbits were calling to me.
lverawrites: “Life was easier before killing all the rabbits.”
https://littleatmospheres.wordpress.com/2013/07/12/the-shifting-of-light-flash-fiction-challenge-last-lines-first/
July 13, 2013 — 2:40 AM
Alecia Miller says:
I absolutely love this Jackie. I have a soft spot for folk tales and I love your take on the rabbits and foxes.
July 15, 2013 — 9:03 PM
Jackie says:
I give up.
July 16, 2013 — 1:10 PM
Jackie says:
Ugh, this thing hates me. Anyway, thank you. There are a bunch of random comments from me now.
July 16, 2013 — 1:12 PM
joolzj says:
The ‘tartan armchair’ is streets ahead of the others, in my humble opinion. The language is gorgeous, and, in so few words, we have a strong sense of this careful, sinister character coupled with intrigue and humour. And that name – ha! Genius.
Lani Gerbi (real name?) is truly a gifted writer.
July 13, 2013 — 3:45 AM
Rachel Saunders says:
Here is my take on “And they never did find the orang-utan”: http://www.scribophile.com/authors/rachel-saunders/works/tupple/
July 13, 2013 — 6:46 AM
Mozette says:
Wow! I found one here that just wrote itself… so here it is!
http://youcantgoback-andotherimpossibilities.blogspot.com.au/2013/07/my-last-job.html
Enjoy. 😀
July 13, 2013 — 8:24 AM
Mr Urban Spaceman says:
Nice take on a difficult line! I do think the whole ‘vamp’ thing could have been left out, to make the whole story (and the antagonist) more mysterious and a little more ominous, but it worked well enough with the assassination method.
July 16, 2013 — 2:46 PM
Mozette says:
Thanks man! The moment I read it… I found more words begin writing after it… my brain just added them on! So, I copied and pasted the line into a blank page in word 2010 and kept on writing and came out with a rough version of what you read… I fought with my muse with whether to keep the vampire thing a secret or not; and decided to keep it in. My muse wasn’t any help in that… just shrugged at me.
And I’ve been watching a lot of Supernatural and vampire shows lately… so mixed a few things I’ve gleaned off them into the writing – always fun when you can do that. 😀
Yours was great! Loved it – as always! 😀
July 16, 2013 — 11:31 PM
Aaron says:
I loved this line. “Life was easier before killing all the rabbits.”
http://aaronswordtree.blogspot.com/2013/07/life-was-easier-before-killing-all.html
July 13, 2013 — 1:16 PM
jreinmiller says:
There were some pretty interesting lines selected, but only a couple stood out to me.
I almost went with rabbits, but had to pick the one I reacted to first so I used: Truth be told, I’m not sure any of them are actually dead.
And that resulted in this story: http://www.jqpdx.com/2013/07/13/understanding/
Enjoy.
July 13, 2013 — 2:56 PM
jdsfiction says:
I dig it man. Great job, and I like the twist. Terrific tag line there at the end. 🙂
July 13, 2013 — 5:26 PM
Mr Urban Spaceman says:
Very neatly written. I really did think we were in for a zombie apocalypse for sure! I very nearly picked this line myself, but picked the book instead. I enjoyed how this one played out.
July 16, 2013 — 2:51 PM
jreinmiller says:
Thanks. 🙂
July 19, 2013 — 7:31 PM
eldiste says:
The story was almost fully formed in my mind after I read this line “Once upon a time, there was a story so short, it was only a single line”
http://eldiste.wordpress.com/2013/07/13/the-most-important-line/
July 13, 2013 — 3:51 PM
rainoftoads says:
I chose to use “She closed the book and watched as it turned to dust.”
What emerged was the following: http://blog.rainoftoads.com/?p=11
(684 Words)
July 13, 2013 — 5:02 PM
Greg says:
Going for Marlanesque: “She closed the book and watched as it turned to dust.”
July 13, 2013 — 6:02 PM
Emily says:
I think I’ll go for “The old man in the hold died three minutes later.”
July 14, 2013 — 4:27 AM
Jottermonster says:
Using “Truth be told, I’m not sure any of them are actually dead.”
http://www.jottermonster.tumblr.com/
July 14, 2013 — 5:35 PM
Jottermonster says:
Using “Truth be told, I’m not sure any of them are actually dead.”
July 14, 2013 — 5:38 PM
Jottermonster says:
http://jottermonster.tumblr.com/post/55450141625/side-doors
July 15, 2013 — 4:15 AM
Mr Urban Spaceman says:
Pretty good! A unique take on hell, and an entertaining read. Thanks for that!
July 15, 2013 — 2:43 PM
Jottermonster says:
Thanks! I really enjoyed how yours unfolded, very intriguing and disturbing. I’d definitely like to read more of it.
July 15, 2013 — 4:58 PM
everett87 says:
I decided to go with: Damien Kelly’s “Truth be told, I’m not sure any of them are actually dead.”
http://rebeccaeverett87.wordpress.com/2013/07/15/midnight-escape/
July 14, 2013 — 8:19 PM
Rick Cook Jr says:
Ran with Josh Roby’s “Once upon a time, there was a story so short, it was only a single line.”
The First Line Was The Last coming in at just under 900 words: http://panningforclouds.com/2013/07/15/the-first-line-was-the-last/
July 15, 2013 — 12:51 PM
Alecia Miller says:
I was torn between the following:
Marlanesque: “She closed the book and watched as it turned to dust.”
lverawrites: “Life was easier before killing all the rabbits.”
but ended up going with Marlanesque’s line.
http://aleciamiller.com/?p=47
July 15, 2013 — 1:53 PM
Rebecca Prescott says:
Okay, so I’ve gone and done it! I’ve entered my first attempt at one of these flash fiction challenges and you know what? I bloody loved it! Don’t care how crap it turned out, was just nice to be writing something quick and easy that someone else asked for. You can find my efforts at: http://darkmattersofthemind.blogspot.com/2013/07/terrible-minds-flash-fiction-challenge.html
Looking forward to reading all y’all other entries.
Much love
Bex
July 15, 2013 — 8:38 PM
Rob Sadler says:
Great story with a complicated main character. The “voice” you wrote with for the narrator works well to give her a personality. I enjoyed how the narrator’s greed easily overtakes any relationship she had with the author and leads to murder. Dark characters and motivations like that are right up my alley. Strong first attempt with the Flash Fiction Challenge.
July 16, 2013 — 12:56 PM
Rebecca Prescott says:
OOps, forgot to say that I went with:
Lani Gerbi: “And then, being mindful not to spill my tea, I eased into the tartan embrace of Endolyn Muirden’s least offensive armchair, and settled back to watch him die.”
July 15, 2013 — 8:40 PM
Jen @ The Well Read Fish says:
“Once upon a time, there was a story so short, it was only a single line.” That’s it. There ya go.
July 15, 2013 — 10:05 PM
Jen @ The Well Read Fish says:
Orangutans! This was very fun. Thanks!
http://wellreadfish.blogspot.com/2013/07/they-never-did-find-orangutan.html
July 15, 2013 — 10:59 PM
David says:
Ha! Silly humans.
July 16, 2013 — 10:48 PM
Rob Sadler says:
I chose Marlanesque’s “She closed the book and watched as it turned to dust.” I managed to start and end the story with that phrase. This is my second flash fiction story here and I’m eagerly awaiting feedback, so comments and critiques are greatly appreciated.
A Name on a Spine: http://www.andablankpage.com/a-name-on-a-spine/
July 16, 2013 — 8:26 AM
Josh Loomis says:
Using Damien Kelly’s line:
http://www.blueinkalchemy.com/2013/07/16/flash-fiction-bump-in-the-night-raven/
July 16, 2013 — 11:12 AM
Jackie says:
Thanks! I really miss winter, ha ha.
July 16, 2013 — 1:06 PM
Jackie says:
…weird. My reply was posted as a comment…
It’s down there, somewhere… But thank you 🙂
July 16, 2013 — 1:09 PM
Matt Gomez says:
http://www.writerscarnival.ca/scavenger-dogs-of-the-wasteland/
I wrote “Scavenger Dogs of the Wasteland” as a result of picking “That plan didn’t fly, superhero, and now we’re short a bazooka.”
July 16, 2013 — 8:49 PM
curiouskermit says:
I really like how descriptive this is! very fast-paced too. good story, fun read.
July 16, 2013 — 9:27 PM
mxgomez says:
Thank you!
July 17, 2013 — 11:23 AM
m.s. jackson says:
Very nice, really liked this one. One of my favorite settings/genres, but great job. Real flowed well and gave a great indication of the setting with just a few words.
July 16, 2013 — 9:27 PM
mxgomez says:
That’s the key to these 1,000 word stories isn’t it? How much can you strip down and still have the essentials? I daresay its been good practice for my “regular” writing as well.
July 17, 2013 — 11:25 AM
jdsfiction says:
That was awesome, man! I dig the style and pacing. As for Razzle…not the shit pipe, poor kid. Great job and dare I say, an seriously burly ride!
July 17, 2013 — 12:39 AM
mxgomez says:
Yeah, well, Dum-Dum’ll be paying for that later I’m sure. Would you believe I was worried that there wouldn’t be enough tension in the story? Guess I was worried for nothing. Thanks for reading!
July 17, 2013 — 11:26 AM
Mr Urban Spaceman says:
Enjoyed it very much! Unique setting, great characters, nice pacing. Thanks for an enjoyable read!
July 17, 2013 — 4:50 PM
Matt Gomez says:
Thank you for reading! Glad you enjoyed it. Wasn’t bad for an afternoon’s worth of work.
July 17, 2013 — 8:33 PM
Ilona the Rose says:
Loved it! This was writing I could actually feel on my skin – and one afternoon?! I want to read whatever you’ve been spending actual time over.
July 18, 2013 — 4:32 PM
Matt Gomez says:
Well, I have a number of pieces over at writerscarnival.ca. (Search for Matt Gomez to bring them up). Slowly working on my own collection of stories for publication. Thank you very much for the kind review.
July 18, 2013 — 4:44 PM
curiouskermit says:
I picked the line by Marlanesque: “She closed the book and watched as it turned to dust.” Here is my story:
“Librarian of the Gods”.
http://curiouskermit.wordpress.com/
July 16, 2013 — 9:18 PM
David says:
I felt obligated to write to my orangutan line. Here’s Fun With Zookeeping.
July 16, 2013 — 10:40 PM
Fatma Alici says:
I took “Truth be told, I’m not sure if any of them are actually dead.” I ended up with Death Sex Assassin http://naharavensari.wordpress.com/2013/07/17/death-sex-assassin/
July 17, 2013 — 3:38 AM
Erik Smith says:
Short and, hopefully, sweet.
http://thecowsayspookpookpook.blogspot.com/2013/07/the-story.html
July 17, 2013 — 4:11 AM