Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays, writer-types.
It’s the month of December and as a gift I’m going to give you:
My boot in your ass and my fist in your trachea.
It’s time to wipe the bullshit from our faces and squeeze all our little excuses so hard their heads pop off one by one. We will exterminate our worst writerly habits with a Dalek-like enthusiasm.
And by “our” bullshit, excuses and bad habits, I also mean my bullshit, excuses, and bad habits.
So! Consider this the annual “cleaning of the pipes,” the yearly “let’s get shut of nonsense,” the month of “fuck you, get to work” before we sashay our holiday-swollen hips into the shining light of the New Year.
If there’s anything you want me in particular to talk — er, yell — about, let me know now.
Now: onto other news!
December E-Book Promo
500 WAYS TO BE A BETTER WRITER is, quite honestly, doing very well for itself. And the “lists of 25” continue to draw in readers, so I’m assuming people like them and don’t find them overbearing. (Or, if they do, they’re at least amusingly overbearing?) (I originally mistyped that as “overbearding,” which is not possible — you can go overboard, but you cannot go overbeard. True story!)
So, I’d like to keep that momentum going.
If you procure 500 WAYS TO BE A BETTER WRITER during the entire month of December, I’ll throw in 250 THINGS YOU SHOULD KNOW ABOUT WRITING as a free PDF.
If you buy 500 WAYS as a PDF, this freebie will be automagic — I’ll email it to you accordingly.
If you buy 500 WAYS via Amazon or B&N, then you’ll need to email me proof-of-purchase at terribleminds at gmail dot com. Because, despite my deepest efforts, I am not yet psychic.
(Also, 500 WAYS could totally use more reviews at Amazon, B&N or GoodReads, if anybody is so kind and inclined? No pressure or anything. Ignore the gun at the small of your back. Shhhh.)
To procure 500 WAYS TO BE A BETTER WRITER:
$2.99 at Amazon (US), Amazon (UK), B&N, PDF
Blackblurbs
We have hot new tasty blurbage for BLACKBIRDS (which is, as you know, available for pre-order, right?) from some incredible people which I am eager and excited to share —
“Trailer-park tension, horrified hilarity, and sheer terror mixed with deft characterization and razor plotting. I literally could not put it down.”
— Lilith Saintcrow, author of Night Shift and Working for the Devil
“Blackbirds is a horror story, a traveling story, a story of loss and what it takes to make things right. It’s a story about fate and how sometimes, if we wrestle with it hard enough, maybe we can change it. Blackbirds is the kind of book that doesn’t let go even after you’ve put it down and nobody else could have made it shine like Chuck Wendig.”
— Stephen Blackmoore, author, City of the Lost and Dead Things
“Mean, moody and mysterious, Blackbirds is a noir joyride peppered with black humour, wry observation, and visceral action. Fans of Chuck Wendig will not be disappointed.”
— Adam Christopher, author of Empire State
“Balls-to-the-wall, take-no-prisoners storytelling at its best.”
— Bill Cameron, author of County Line
“[Blackbirds is] A gleefully dark, twisted road trip for everyone who thought Fight Club was too warm and fuzzy. If you enjoy this book, you’re probably deeply wrong in the head. I loved it, and will be seeking professional help as soon as Chuck lets me out of his basement.”
— James Moran, Severance, Doctor Who and Torchwood screenwriter
“Enchanting and drowned in blood, BLACKBIRDS is a meaty piece of fiction, a non-stop mind-job where the first hit hurts and you keep going back for more. It’s the kind of gritty, unapologetic story that grips you long after the book’s done; dark, intense, utterly without mercy. Chuck Wendig spins one hell of a tale.”
— Karina Cooper, author of the Dark Mission series
Other Workity-Jerkity
The first draft of MOCKINGBIRD is complete, and the second draft is actually almost in the can. It takes Miriam on a deeper journey into the heart of her gift-slash-curse. Of course, most of you haven’t even read BLACKBIRDS yet, but when you do, I think you’ll eat up the horror with a silver spoon. Oh! It looks like the second book’s release date is moved up, actually — now Aug/Sept 2012 rather than “sometime in 2013.”
I’m told that DOUBLE DEAD is doing well for Abaddon, which is nice! I’ve heard tell that some folks would like the story of Coburn the vampire to continue, and between you, me, and the starving raccoon in the corner, I’m hoping that such a thing will soon become a reality. Feel free to tell Abaddon — “Hey, that Chuck guy? We sure do like him a bunch. Here, have some candy. Get in the van. GET IN THE GODDAMN VAN.”
I’m receiving some killer stories from the assigned authors of the DON’T REST YOUR HEAD anthology. So far, my editorial job will be a very light one, indeed.
I’m revising the opening chapters of DINOCALYPSE NOW, my Spirit of the Century novel — I found a way to better connect to the characters and give them a stronger emotional throughline.
I’ve got a second round of notes on POPCORN back from uber-agent Stacia Decker, and I’m excited to push them forward — think it’ll really become the book I envisioned it becoming. (Never underestimate the awesome power of editorial criticism to refine a story and highlight paths you wish were obvious all along.)
Next week I speak to the Writer’s Guild in NYC, joining Lance Weiler for a day-long talk on transmedia.
Further opportunities continue to line up for 2012, all of which are filled with nougat and custard and other delightful flavors. Novels and a new film idea and some cool transmedia endeavors.
And 2012 will surely see new e-books. Hopefully one of those will be the follow-up to SHOTGUN GRAVY — but if you want that, then I need you to spread the word and help get the book to readers.
Finally, thinking on doing a Kickstarter to keep terribleminds running in 2012.
And that’s all she wrote, kids.
How are you doing?
Alisha Miller says:
YES. MORE COBURN. YYYYEEEEESSSSSS!
I actually was just thinking I’d like you to write about how to tackle a book series (especially how do you end a book that’s obviously part of a series), so, since you asked, that’s what I’d like to see.
I’m so excited – so many books coming! I want to read them all! I’ve been spreading the word pretty hardcore about Double Dead. I think a good chunk of my buddies over at Ogeeku will buy it – and especially after I write an article about how fantastic it is. They’re a bunch of zombie loving freaks, so it’s right up their alley.
In short, definitely a fan.
December 1, 2011 — 2:01 AM
CjEggett says:
I finally got Double Dead & pre-ordered Blackbirds. I reckon it would be worth it even if I just use them to tap the keyboard to open the RSS feed every morning, as this blog seems to be the first thing I read regardless.
As for things I’d like to see you write about, how about: 25 mistakes Sci-Fi writers make at least once in this reality.
December 1, 2011 — 4:02 AM
Alexa Muir says:
One review coming up Mr. Wendig, on Amazon UK – please can you remove the gun from my back now? Or you could consider some things I’d like to learn more about:
– Magazine submissions – worth it? Pile of pointless poop? Advice on successful submissions, etc would be good too. I want, nay, need to know.
– Beta-readers; where do I find them, how can I tell if they’re any good, will anyone do, and how can I threaten/bribe them to give me honest but constructive feedback.
– Blog post ideas; how the hell do you come up with so many and how can I do the same?
I could go on but I will stop. For now. These are my burning questions and I thank you for any advice you can give. *leaves room doing the Waynes World “We’re not worthy” body wave*
December 1, 2011 — 8:47 AM
John Adamus says:
Keep kicking ass on Dinocalypse Now.
And of course I’ll throw a bucket of money at your Kickstarter to keep things moving.
December 1, 2011 — 9:01 AM
Darlene Underdahl says:
Lots of *life* sitting on my shoulders right now, but after the holidays I’ll have another book up. This one will be about affable drunks, a cat, dogs, wild horses, nasty Mensa members, and a woman who thinks she’s Betty Boop. You’ll like it.
Since I lost a lot of writing years as a wage slave and family servant, I didn’t get some important memos; apparently there are *correct* ways to describe vampires, werewolves and zombies?
In my future books I’ll go for serial killers. I *know* I can do serial killers (smirk).
You’ve got projects all over the place and you’ve got a right to be proud of yourself! That didn’t happen in a vacuum.
I like the humor of the guy locked in your basement; don’t kill him.
December 1, 2011 — 9:28 AM
Joy Daniels (@AuthorJDaniels) says:
Great promo – you totally convinced me. I clicked on the link and bought “500 Ways” before I even finished reading the post.
A ‘Yeah NaNo Winner’ present for me! 🙂
December 1, 2011 — 11:22 AM
Amber J. Gardner says:
If there is one thing I’d definitely Iove for you to talk about is how on earth do you write so damn much and juggle so many projects at once successfully…while also having a family and a dog?
Thank you.
And yay for literary success/progress!!
December 1, 2011 — 12:00 PM
Amaranth says:
Aww! I just bought it a few days ago so no free stuff for me, huh?
December 1, 2011 — 2:33 PM
Chris Mackey says:
Agreeing with Alexa Muir, I’d love to see a “25 Things” about writing for magazines.
I will give your kickstarter money.
December 1, 2011 — 6:14 PM
Jen Galbavy says:
Purchased and email sent. I read this blog post right after two of my friends ganged up on me on Twitter to start seriously thinking about turning this year’s NaNo into something real. I hemmed and hawed and made excuses, then read this, about wiping the bullshit from my face and fuck you, get to work. And I thought damn. He could be right.
Of course, the irony that this advice was given and got me thinking about seriously editing my cheesy sweet romance novel isn’t lost on me.
December 1, 2011 — 9:17 PM
Guilie says:
Chuck, you’re my hero. Any time I start losing the knack for the kind of irony that slaps readers into paying attention and instead get gooey and verbose, I come to your blog to get back on track. Your advice–anything you choose to talk about, really–is fantastic (yes, I’m going to buy your book, thanks for the freebie), and the sardonic way you deliver it is over-the-top brilliant. Thanks!
December 2, 2011 — 10:20 AM
Ken Preston says:
Damn! I just bought 250 things… off Amazon about a week ago (and already read it!) Any chance I could have 500 ways…as a freebie…? 🙂
December 15, 2011 — 3:20 PM
terribleminds says:
I apologize, Ken — it goes the other way around. 500–>250. 🙂
Thanks, though!
— c.
December 15, 2011 — 4:00 PM
Ken Preston says:
You’re a hard man Chuck. But, seen as I love reading your stuff so much, I’ll let it go…
BTW, impressive beard. 🙂
December 15, 2011 — 5:39 PM