Chuck Wendig: Terribleminds

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Flash Fiction Challenge: To Write About Food

The loss of Anthony Bourdain is staggering to me. I’ve said elsewhere, but I feel like Bourdain was the next evolution of Hunter. S. Thompson — a vicious, rigorous truth-teller, but far less performative than Thompson. And ultimately far gentler, in all the best ways. He was authentic and earnest and I’ll miss his voice, his writing, his everything.

He wasn’t just a chef, and he certainly didn’t write only about food, but I think connecting food to stories is one of the things he did, in a bigger, stranger way than you usually find with people. He really understood the cultural connections and ramifications of that.

So, that’s your job today, in honor of Bourdain.

Write a story and let it be about food, but about more than food, too. Connect the food to something larger. Reach. Extend your narrative muscles. Find out how food is about culture, about people, sometimes about safety, other times about transgression. Go big or go small, just go somewhere with it.

Length: ~2000 words

Due by: Friday, June 15th, noon EST

Post at your online space.

Drop a link below so we can read it.

Write.

The Awkward Author Photo Contest Strikes Back

It is time, once more, for the return of the

AWKWARD AUTHOR PHOTO CONTEST.

*drum roll*

*crash of thunder*

*ravens descend*

We’ve done a few iterations so far, and some of my favorites and past winners are riiiight here —

(You get the idea.)

Way this works is easy:

You take a photo of yourself. Or someone takes a photo of you. And this photo is meant to imitate a really badreally weirdreally awkward author photo. Some real authors have terrible, terrible photos on their book jackets, and your job is to outdo those at every turn. Funny is good. Weird is wonderful. Clever is excellent. (More examples here.)

And yes, there be prizes.

The rules are these:

EDIT:

The contest runs from today till Weds, July 11th, 2018, noon EST.

You get one entry. Just one. Multiple entries disqualifies you.

Email that entry — a photo of medium or greater size, at least 700px wide — to me at terribleminds at gmail dot com, and when you do…

Use the subject (and this is a must): AWKWARD AUTHOR PHOTO CONTEST SUBMISSION 2018.

I will search for that subject, and if it ain’t exact, I might miss your entry.

Your photo will be uploaded to a public Flickr page so that it can be seen and judged, and it may also end up here on the blog or other social media if it’s one of the winners. I don’t own the photo, though, and I claim no rights to it. If you want to share credit for who took the photo, please do! I’ll try to include any credit I get with the photo page.

Open to international (non-US) participants, but international winners pay their own shipping.

I will get the photos up and judged in the week following the contest deadline, which means the books will likely be out to you around or just after Christmas, but before New Years.

Photoshop is acceptable, provided you’re ‘shopping a real photo.

You do not need to be an actual writer/author to enter this contest. Though, actual writers and authors are obviously welcome and encouraged to join.

There will be two winners.

The first winner is chosen by ME, ME, ME — *raises fists to the sky as lightning is summoned to them* — because damnit this is my site and I get to pick the Grand Prize Winner.

The second winner is chosen by YOU, YOU, YOU — *the camera whirls about you in a dizzying pirouette* — because surely nothing can go wrong with crowdsourcing.

I will pick my winner by Friday, July 13th.

And then I will open up the contest to a 7-day-voting period, which means the You-Chosen Winner will be picked by Friday the 20th. That said, I will be gone that following week, so I’ll announce winners on Friday, the 27th!

This is open only to those in the continental United States — international folks will have to pay their own shipping and handling.

The prizes be these:

The Me-Picked winner will win the following —

A full hardcover set of Star Wars: Aftermath, defaced with my signature.

A copy of Damn Fine Story, paperback, also ruined with my autograph.

A copy of The Raptor & The Wren, hardcover, also cursed with my inky name.

And a 3-book prize pack curated by Del Rey Books based on the winner’s tastes.

And a postcard where I inscribe for you a unique, and probably nonsense, piece of writing and/or life advice.

The You-Picked winner will win —

A 3-book prize pack curated by Del Rey Books based on the winner’s tastes.

And a postcard where I inscribe for you a unique, and probably nonsense, piece of writing and/or life advice.

And that’s it.

If you have questions, pop them in the comments below.

Otherwise:

BRING YOUR MOST AWKWARD AWKWARDNESS TO THE TABLE.

Macro Monday Magnifies The Moist Monster

Okay, that subject header sounds like I’m talking about one thing but I’m really talking about this thing. And before you click that link lemme just warn you — it’s a spider. I mean, not a real spider that will jump out of your screen and bite your face, but a spider photo, and it’s a spider covered in raindrops sitting on a flower. But some people are viciously arachnophobic, so I thought I’d hide it behind the jump there.

The same spider created the web in the header image above. The one that looks like something written in space in the language of raindrops.

Anyway.

HELLO.

I am back from BookCon and BEA, where I was able to rain copies of Damn Fine Story down on all those who would come near me — and as it turns out, many seemed to want the book, either because they knew what it was or because they were entranced by the monocled elk. So, if you have grabbed the book, or really any of my books, by garsh and by golly I could sure use the a review at the Review Location of your choice. Amazon! Goodreads! Carved onto the side of a mountain with a doom laser! Tattooed on your face! Whatever.

Here, for your service, have a creampuff:

Okay, it’s a photo of a creampuff, but you were okay with it not being real when it was a spider, so don’t complain now.

Let’s see, what other news nuggets of note?

Damn Fine Story will soon come to audio. More details when I have them.

Also coming to audio: The Raptor & The Wren and Vultures.

Zer0es is still a buck-ninety-nine.

Wanderers is out of copy-edits. Soon out for blurbs which is — ha ha, ohh man, that’s always a terrifying part of sending your book out.

Also, I’m really coming around to the idea of starting a Patreon/Drip (probably Drip) — it would focus on writing advice in an “advice column” way, where the column would, after a period of exclusivity, drift over here to the blog properly. I like the idea, but not sure how many readers here are really… interested in that? Give a shout in the comments if that’s a thing you’d dig.

And that’s it.

Have a good week.

Or don’t. I’m not your Mom.

I am your Weird Uncle though, so I feel I have some authority.

Flash Fiction Challenge: A Random Scattering Of Fresh Titles

BOOM. I’ll give you ten titles. You will either pick one of the ten or you will use a random number generator to select one, and then you will write some flash fiction paired to that title.

Get it? Got it? Great.

The titles are:

  1. Crying in the Wind
  2. The Dreamer’s Door
  3. Mist and Light
  4. The Hustler
  5. Absent Elves
  6. The Bridge and the Rose
  7. The Dweller
  8. The Reaper’s Rope
  9. Into The Parlor We Screamed
  10. Star Blight

(All randomly generated titles, by the by.)

Length: ~1500 words

Due by: Friday, June 8th, noon EST

Post at your online space.

Give us a link below to that post.

The end.

Fonda Lee: So, You Think You Know How To Write A Sequel

You cannot go wrong with Fonda Lee, as has been proven time and time again. That’s true with her books, and true with her guest posts here at terribleminds. And if you require further example, she’s back — this time, talking about how you think you know how to write a sequel, ha ha ha oh no. Ohhhh no.

* * *

STEP ONE: DELUSIONAL OPTIMISM

Congratulations! You wrote a book and now your publisher and your readers are eagerly clamoring for the sequel. No problem, you’ve got this. You spent a long time, maybe years, creating the world and developing the characters, so all the hard work is already done. Now you just have to continue the story, and you have plenty of ideas about how to do that because you cleverly left some threads untied in the first book and also scribbled some stuff on a Post-It note when your agent asked you for a summary of book two. Start by making an outline. Pat yourself on the back; it looks good. You’re a fucking professional now. Be sure to agree to an aggressive deadline. After all, the market rewards momentum and you don’t want to keep fans waiting!

STEP TWO: DARK NIGHT OF THE SOUL

Huh. You were sailing along in your writing, humming a merry tune, but now something’s wrong. You’re doing what you’re supposed to, you’re continuing the story, but there’s a nagging suspicion growing in your gut that you’ve been following the figurative path with your eyes on your feet and now as you slowly raise your head, you realize the sun has gone down in the woods and the trail has vanished, and the glowing red eyes are beginning to circle round.

What happened, you ask yourself. You analyze your choices. The sequel you’re writing is too similar to the first book; you’re just retreading ground and not being inventive enough. Or it’s too different from the first book; you’re not delivering any of the stuff that readers will want after reading the series opener. You’re spending too much time dealing with the events of the first book. Or not spending enough. You have too many new characters. You have too few. You step back and compare what you’ve done so far with your first book. Terrible mistake. The first book—in all its edited, revised, beautifully published glory—is perfect. This is dog vomit. You decide you would like to burn the manuscript, pretend this never happened, and start on a new project about something completely different. You can’t. You’re committed not just to the sequel, but to the canon you’ve already written. Also, you’ve already spent the advance money. By writing the first book, you made a very nice, sturdy sandbox, and now you’re trapped in the damn sandbox, and no one can hear you claw at the inside surfaces with your bloody fingernails.

Dazed and at a loss, you get on the Internet hoping for panda videos. Hey, people are talking about your first book! It’s doing well, getting good reviews, being nominated for awards, going into subsequent printings! You despair; you can’t possibly deliver a sequel that will live up. Or there’s silence; the first book’s not doing as well as you’d hoped. You despair; no one is going to read your second book anyway, so all you’re struggles are for nothing. You see-saw between these two states multiple times in a single day. You call up your writer friends. Oh yeah, they say, didn’t we tell you? Writing the sequel is a bitch. No, you scream, you didn’t tell me! No one told me! This is supposed to be easier! You rend your hair and crawl under the table.

STEP THREE: UNDERSTANDING THE NATURE OF SEQUELS

Okay, you’ve calmed down with the narcotic substance of your choice and have emerged from under the table to re-evaluate your situation. Slowly, you come to the realization that sequels are a unique challenge: You’re trying to write a new story (difficult at the best of times) within the scope of a larger story. You need to stay true to the events and the characters of the first book while also bringing in new elements, raising the stakes, and going deeper into the layers of the narrative, all at the same time. All with the shadow of public expectation hovering over you.

Take heart; you haven’t become a shittier writer between your first and second book. This is hard stuff and you haven’t faced this particular set of constraints and pressures before. Take a deep breath. You can do this. There are people who believe in you: your agent, your editor, your readers—they believe in you. To start with, let go of your first book. Just a little. You need some mental distance from it and how it’s performing. Stop reading reviews of what people liked and didn’t like about it and what they want or don’t want in the sequel. Pretend someone else wrote that book and you’re picking up where they left off. You can’t lose sight of the story canon that’s been established, but this new book is its own thing. What’s the story you want to tell now?

The characters, wherever they were at the end of the first book, need new goals and story arcs and/or new layers or complications in the motivations they’ve carried forward. The plot needs to make sense in the context of what’s already happened but also go in fresh and unexpected directions. Think about some of the best movie sequels: Terminator 2 flipped expectations by making the villain of the first movie the hero of the second. The tone of The Empire Strikes Back is dramatically different from the space opera candy of A New Hope. The Godfather Part II cut back in time. Alien was an atmospheric horror story; Aliens was a rousing action flick.

Put yourself in the sequel’s shoes for a minute. Just as every villain is the hero of their own story, the sequel doesn’t think of itself as a second player. The sequel thinks of the first book as the opener, and itself as the main event. “Thanks for warming up the crowd for me, buddy, let me take over from here,” says your sequel, confidently throwing its cape over its shoulder. Sequel acknowledges what was cool about First Book, but it isn’t afraid to do its own thing. With that in mind, you stop obsessing over writing a good sequel, and focus on simply writing a good story.

STEP FOUR: ALL THE WORK AND HALF THE FUN

You recommit. You write the damn book. You rewrite it. You revise it. Many times. You probably go through more drafts than you did with the first book (but you set that fact aside, because you’ve resolved to stop comparing this manuscript to the first book, remember?) You’re under time pressure, but if you need to, you ask for an extension because it’s more important that the book is good than that it’s released on a precise schedule, no matter what they say.

At last, you’re done. It was a ton of work, and guess what? The sequel will likely less attention that the first book did, especially if the first was your debut. Odds are it will get less hype, fewer trade and reader reviews, lower sales, and have less chance of being nominated for awards. Woop-de- friggin’-do! So…why do people do this again? Why don’t we all write standalones?

Because the reward for both the author and the reader is just too good to pass up: a chance to go back to a world we’ve fallen in love with, to spend more time with characters who’ve captured our hearts, to tell a bigger story on a bigger canvas, to answer the burning question, “What happens next?” With luck, your badass sequel goes out into the world and makes your existing readers very happy, and to the new readers, it says, “Hey, you’re missing out, but you can still get in on the party. Let me introduce you to my buddy over here, First Book.”

Ahhh, you did it, you wrote a sequel! Flush with victory, you sit down to write the third book!

Don’t talk to me about the third book.

* * *

Fonda Lee’s new young adult science fiction novel, Cross Fire, is the sequel to Exo, which was a Junior Library Guild Selection and Andre Norton Award finalist. Fonda is also the author of the YA novel Zeroboxer. Her recent adult debut, the fantasy saga Jade City, was a finalist for the Nebula and Locus Awards and named a Best Book of 2017 by NPR, Barnes & Noble, Powell’s Books, Syfy Wire, Den of Geek, and the Verge.

In the stunning follow-up to Exo, Earth’s century of peace as a colony of an alien race has been shattered. As the government navigates peace talks with the human terrorist group Sapience, Donovan Reyes tries to put his life back together and return to his duty as a member of the security forces. But a new order comes from the home planet: withdraw. Earth has proven too costly and unstable to maintain as a colony, so the aliens, along with a small selection of humans, begin to make plans to leave. As word of the withdrawal spreads through the galaxy, Earth suddenly becomes vulnerable to a takeover from other alien races. Invaders who do not seek to live in harmony with humans, but to ravage and destroy the planet for its resources.

As a galactic invasion threatens, Donovan realizes that Sapience holds the key that could stop the pending war. Yet in order to save Earth, all species will have to work together, and Donovan might just have to make the ultimate sacrifice to convince them. But can one person save an entire planet from total extinction?

Fonda Lee: Website | Twitter

Crossfire: Exo Excerpt | Indiebound | Amazon | B&N | Powells (Signed Copies)

Macro Montuesday Is Back From The Heat Death Of The Universe

I HAVE RETURNED FROM THE DESERT, HAVING HAD A VISION OF A BUNCH OF WEIRDO AUTHORS GATHERING THERE TO DRINK FANCY COCKTAILS AND TALK NERD SHIT and lo, it was good.

I met those randos above, which include, from L to R: Brandon Sanderson, Mark Coal, James Joyce, Stevia McGee, and me in the center: Chnurk Mandog.

*checks notes*

Okay that can’t be right.

Fine fine fine, it’s a handful of WONDERPALS, the storytellers: Sam Sykes, Myke Cole, Aaron Mahnke, and Delilah S. Dawson. We were loosed onto the streets of the city to roam and wreak havoc. (Oh and P.S., Aaron Mahnke’s newest Lore tome is out today. Go grabby Wicked Mortals — print or e-book. Don’t make me come over there.)

Seriously, Phoenix Comic-Con — wait, Comic Fest? — wait, Fan Fusion? — was rad. Such a wonderful crowd of fans and writers, really some of my favorite people in the whole damn universe. Trips like this make me realize how lucky I am to do what I do and to surround myself with such talented, kind, and utterly strange people.

*throws mug to the ground; it shatters*

ANOTHER, I SAY.

(More photos below.)

Let’s see, what else is going on?

OOH OOH OOH, Tor.com revealed the newest and last Miriam Black coverVultures, which comes out in January 2019, now has what has easily become one of my favorite covers of all my books, courtesy of Adam Doyle. Tor has the exclusive. They also have the exclusive cover copy/story description — but I’ll warn you, if you’re not caught up, it’s hella spoilery. Good news is, you can bop over and see the cover without reading that. But it will give away the events of prior books, as the last book in a series ultimately must. Vultures is not a book to read if you’ve not read the five books that precede it.

I also have some cover designs rolling in for Wanderers, and some ARCs have already started to go out — even though the book doesn’t come out until April of next year, Del Rey wants to get an early promotional jump, so that’s exciting. I’ll show the cover when we’ve settle on one but it is looking really amazing. I’m honestly nervous to have people read the book.

Hm. What else?

Some nice sales or price-drops on my books in digital —

Blackbirds is now $5.99.

Invasive is also $5.99, but also is enrolled in Kindle Unlimited.

Zer0es is on sale for $1.99 — not sure how long that lasts, so go grabby grabby.

And I think that’s it.

More photos from the con below:

(photo courtesy of either Kris Morris or Janelle Badali — not sure which of them took the shot!)