Chuck Wendig: Terribleminds

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How To Make Your Kids Like Spinach

Maybe it’s just me, but although veggies are increasingly hard to come by in this area, one vegetable lingers, reluctantly available: spinach. And I don’t know why. Spinach is goddamn amazing. It’s a nutritional powerhouse, for one. For two, it tastes amazing. No, it may not have the COLON LOCOMOTIVE powers of, say, kale, it’s still green and healthy and all that happy shit.

But, for some reason, people aren’t buying it. Again, around here. Maybe where you are, everybody’s Popeye looking for muscles, but here, they’re leaving that and Brussels sprouts on the shelf. Lockdown still won’t push them to the fringes of the produce aisle, I guess?

(Here’s my Brussels sprouts recipe, before you ask.)

Maybe it’s because The Kids Today are like The Kids Of Yesteryear and just won’t eat spinach. (And only now is it occurring to me that Popeye was some kind of vegetable propaganda. Same way an apple a day keeps the doctor away, and carrots “help” your “eyesight” and other such vegetable legends.) I sure didn’t eat spinach when I was a kid, are you nuts? No, no, I had a discerning palate. It was Spaghetti-Os or nothing, you vulgarian. Toss a couple hot dogs in there? C’est magnifique.

More seriously, I’ve come to believe that the parents of yesteryear — like, let’s say of the 80s — really didn’t get how to cook vegetables all the time. And a lot of veggies available were in cans? It wasn’t a good time for vegetables, no wonder we were all sick and weak. Mushy asparagus. Mushrooms that tastes less like graceful wood ear and more like human baby ears. Steam it, boil it, meh. So, entirely possible spinach just wasn’t winning any awards back then. But we’ve grown smarter when it comes to cooking vegetables and I have a super-hella-stupid-easy spinach dish that will —

Wait, what are you looking at?

Hello? Eyes down here.

Ah. Ah. Yeah, I get it, the photo at the top of the post contains no spinach. It’s tomatoes and okra and potatoes and tomatillo husks and I’m sorry, I don’t have any spinach photos. Settle down. It’s fine.

AS I WAS SAYING

This is a spinach dish my kid doesn’t just eat, but that he eats with delight.

Now, my kid is also a little weird. He likes veggies a whole lot. He likes sushi. For his birthday, he asks for me to make him Brussels sprouts. So, do recognize his tastes are skewed for a kid, but I also like to believe, perhaps mistakenly, it’s because I know how to make food tasty.

And this spinach? Is tasty.

Here’s what you do.

Skillet. Stainless steel for me.

Bit of olive oil or butter, depending on your predilections for particular FOOD LUBES.

Then, some chopped garlic. Again, your tastes matter here. Thinly sliced garlic is nice. Minced is fine. Maybe a shallot instead, who cares. Food is customizable, it’s a menu of possibility and delight. Honestly, if all you have is garlic powder in These Perilous Quarantimes, that’s fine, too, just don’t add it now, add it later. Just note that the bigger the chonks of garlic, the milder the garlic taste will be, because it’s got less cuts to the, I dunno, GARLICKIAN MICROSTRUCTURE and reduced GARLIC SQUARE FOOTAGE or something. Hashtag science. Hashtag shut up.

Get the garlic in the oil or butter.

Cook until fragrant, not until burned.

Then, fill the skillet with spinach.

Here the question is, fresh or frozen? Yes. Whatever. Either. Frozen is fine, and remember, frozen vegetables tend to be plunged into suspended animation at the peak of their freshness. I like the Woodstock brand, because it comes out looking like a batch of cryo-nuggs of sci-fi weed, and it has a delicate tea-leaf taste to it. Shit, maybe I’ve just been cooking tea leaves and weed? That might explain a lot about me. It’s fine. Point is, fresh or frozen.

And it can also be Swiss chard. Or other greens of your choosing.

This application is easy and applies to every cooking green I’ve tried it with.

So.

Heat on medium. Spinach in the pan.

Salt and pepper go onto it.

Cook it down until the leaves are reduced. If fresh, you’ll start with this massive APPLE CART of spinach, and end up with four thimbles, as all that water comes out and the leaves wilt. And in that case you can keep adding spinach to freshen it up. It’s pretty resilient long as you don’t burn it.

Add in couple splashes of chicken broth, just enough to coat the bottom of the pan.

A pinch of Italian seasoning or Herbs de Provence.

(That’s French for Herbert, of Provence.)

Cook, cook, cook.

Ten minutes, fifteen, I dunno. Like I said, spinach is resilient. A good food for these tough times. Spinach doesn’t give a fuck. It has green goodness and it doesn’t care if you don’t like it.

Then when it’s cooked down pretty good and has started to lose its emerald green in favor of a Bob Ross-painted pine-tree, you want to add first a splash of sherry vinegar. How much is a splash? I dunno. A splash. You can add more if you need to so like, think a tablespoon or two.

Then, cook a bit, just a minute or two to incorporate.

Final bit, add in a couple splashes of heavy cream. Twice the amount of the vinegar, let’s say.

Mix-a-mix-a-mix.

There. That’s it. Season again after tasting if need be.

It’s good. Your kids will like it. You will like it, too. Unless you’re one of those weird adults who won’t eat vegetables. Christ in a crab trap, eat your vegetables, you scurvy-sickened ricket-monsters.

All right, that’s it. Go eat some spinach. And buy my books or I die.

Molly Tanzer: Five Things I Learned Writing Creatures of Charm and Hunger

Two young witches, once inseparable, are set at odds by secrets and wildly dangerous magic.

In the waning days of World War II, with Allied victory all but certain, desperate Nazi diabolists search for a demonic superweapon to turn the tide. A secluded castle somewhere in the south of Germany serves as a laboratory for experiments conducted upon human prisoners, experiments as vile as they are deadly.

Across the English Channel, tucked into the sleepy Cumbrian countryside, lies the Library, the repository of occult knowledge for the Société des Éclairées, an international organization of diabolists. There, best friends Jane Blackwood and Miriam Cantor, tutored by the Société’s Librarian—and Jane’s mother—Nancy, prepare to undergo the Test that will determine their future as diabolists.

When Miriam learns her missing parents are suspected of betraying the Société to the Nazis, she embarks on a quest to clear their names, a quest involving dangerous diabolic practices that will demand more of her than she can imagine. Meanwhile Jane, struggling with dark obsessions of her own, embraces a forbidden use of the Art that could put everyone she loves in danger.

As their friendship buckles under the stress of too many secrets, Jane and Miriam will come face to face with unexpected truths that change everything they know about the war, the world, and most of all themselves. After all, some choices cannot be unmade–and a sacrifice made with the most noble intention might end up creating a monster.

* * *

Writing from experience can add verisimilitude to a fantastical narrative…

Creatures of Charm and Hunger is set at the tail end of WWII, in the Cumbria region of England (very near the place where Beatrix Potter lived, wrote, and drew). Miriam, one of the co-tagonists, is a 15-year-old German Jew who has been living with English family friends for years, after her parents sent her away. Miriam, her friend Jane, and Jane’s mother Nancy are all diabolists—they summon demons and traffic with them.

A lot of that is well beyond my experience, it’s true! So, to anchor the narrative I made a few choices. I decided to tell a story about being frustrated about feeling ineffective in a world gone mad, which is something highly relatable to most of us I’d guess. Of wanting to spread one’s wings and getting angry when they feel clipped. And I decided to inject a little of my own experience of having a complicated identity. Miriam is actually half-Jewish—or not Jewish at all, depending on how Talmudic one wishes to get about it. That’s my life, too. My father was Jewish, my mother is not, and I grew up not knowing how to feel about it. We didn’t do a lot of Jewish things, and I knew I wasn’t technically Jewish, but growing up in rural Georgia in the 1980s meant I felt pretty Jewish when I’d experience bouts of antisemitism from my neighbors. So I decided to mine that strange sensation to give Miriam some (hopefully) realistic characterization as a counterpoint to her using diabolic astral projection to kill Nazis.

…but writing truthfully, from outside of one’s experience, is crucial in other ways

While I consider myself a fantasist, I also consider myself a realist. I write about people, and I spend a lot of time trying to craft realistic interactions between those people, even when they’re in speculative situations. And one of my missions in my Diabolist’s Library series was to write about people from all walks of life interacting with demons and diablerie. So, Creatures of Will and Temper had lesbian romance and a bit of straight romance too in with the fencing and the art and the secret societies; Creatures of Want and Ruin featured a healthy polyamorous relationship as a counterpoint to the rigid moralism of the villains, and in Creatures of Charm and Hunger I’ve got an ace character, Jane, and a coalition of diabolists of all sorts teaming up to fight Nazis. Researching asexuality, as well as everything else, helped me understand my world a bit better, and also served to increase the realism of a fantastical narrative.

Joy moments are crucial, especially for dark stories

Years ago now I read a review of Prometheus, the now-notorious Alien sequel that featured some real head-scratchers like male-only surgery pods, gay impregnation panic, and scientists who don’t seem to know a whole lot of, well, science, that remarked upon how there is only one real moment of genuine joy in the film. They pointed to that scene where the cyborg (or whatever; I’m not googling it) played by Michael Fassbender stumbles upon a bunch of glowing technology balls (I really do refuse to google) and looks upon them in awe and astonishment. Fassbender seems to have an experience of the sublime in that moment, one that stands in stark, regrettable contrast to the scientists and explorers, who come across as both tense and inattentive most of the time. That sort of filmmaking doesn’t exactly inspire the audience to feel much (for another example of this, see the dour “space sure is boring” turkey Ad Astra). There’s no wonder, no sense of anticipation or excitement felt by anyone on board the ship when they land on Alien Planet. One wonders why they became scientists at all!

Fassbender’s joy moment is indeed so remarkable that it was used widely as the image associated with the film. And there’s something instructive in this—something I thought about when writing Creatures of Charm and Hunger. Creatures of Charm and Hunger is a dark story, about war, about the perils of growing up and the perils of refusing to, about what drives us to want to be seen and what drives us to wish not to see. And when I read my draft through the first time, I saw a lack in it—the same lack Prometheus has. No joy moments. And these girls—they’re teen diabolists doing fantastical things with bizarre reagents. There needed to be moments of “oh fuck this is so COOL” in there with all the big feelings of anxiety and pain and rage and uncertainty.

Figuring out “how magic works” is not for me…

The biggest thing I learned working on Creatures of Charm and Hunger is that I freaking hate writing about “how magic works.” And I’m pants at it it, too—my agent told me to cut most, if not all of the specifics of diabolism from the novel. I was only too happy to; it was not good writing. Lampshading it was the right choice, narratively and aesthetically, but even dialed-back it felt overwhelming to make choices of that sort. I hated it so much I texted a writer friend of mine the following:

Just in case…

Every writer has things they do well and things that challenge them. I learned from Creatures and Charm and Hunger that figuring out how magic works isn’t for me—and that’s okay! It’s something I’ll think about moving forward, since I don’t plan on stopping writing magical and fantastical stories.

…but writing about cats sure is

Creatures of Charm and Hunger is a cat book. “What’s a cat book?” you might ask, if you’re not a cat person. But cat people… we know that all books with a prominent cat in them are “cat books.” Sabriel, Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban, Bunnicula, The Castle of Llyr, The Master and Margarita—the list goes on and on. Cats end up in books because cats add a certain zest or whimsy to a narrative, and a prominent cat sticks in the mind, especially a well-written one.

Smudge, the cat in Creatures of Charm and Hunger is largely based on my own cat, the Toad. Toad… oh man, the Toad. He has always been a challenging kitty. Yes, I know the Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal comic about how everyone (except replicants) thinks their cat is special, but as a life-long cat owner, I’ll tell you what: the Toad is a mess. (I hand raised him, and he has a lot of the problems that come from that, as well as other, weirder ones.) But, he’s my best boy, and I used a lot of his quirkiness to give life to Smudge, who ends up being even more unusual than most cats. Which is saying something…

I said above that I love writing people. It turns out, I love writing from life. Studying the Toad to add realism to my depictions of Smudge was no hardship. Most cat people will happily drop what they are doing to watch their cat clean their ears for minutes at a time! But this, for me, was different. I wasn’t just staring at him through my usual haze of toxoplasmosis; I was watching him to capture him, as I do with people. I’d never written a book with a prominent animal companion in it before, and I liked it so much, my next book is going to have one, too.

* * *

Molly Tanzer is the author of The Diabolist’s Library trilogy: Creatures of Will and Temper, the Locus Award-nominated Creatures of Want and Ruin, and Creatures of Charm and Hunger. She is also the author of the indie weird western Vermilion, an io9 and NPR “Best Book” of 2015and the British Fantasy Award-nominated collection, A Pretty Mouth. For more information about her novels, her appearances, and her critically acclaimed short fiction, visit mollytanzer.com, or (better) follow her @molly_the_tanz on Twitter or @molly_tanzer on Instagram. She lives outside of Boulder, CO with her cat, the Toad.

Molly Tanzer: Website | Twitter

Creatures of Charm and Hunger: Indiebound | Amazon

Disjecta Membra: 4

Once again, the big delicious cookie of a blog post I might have once planned has been stepped on and broken into fragments. A crime, to be sure, for now it is all crumbs, but just the same, crumbs is what I got. Please enjoy the broken bits.

Fiona Apple has a new album out wait what? I knew there was an album coming, as I’d read it in Emily Nussbaum’s phenomenal piece on Apple earlier this year. But I didn’t know the album would just one day be a thing I could have. And now I have it? And it’s amazing?! Okay, listen, Idler Wheel is probably one of my favorite albums of all time. A top tenner. It is raw-boned and throaty and barely constrained in its willing derangement, and it speaks to me in a thousand different ways. So I’m digging into this new one and finding it has its own lunacy — it’s a bit quirkier, but still feels like someone took their heart and their brain and blended them up in a Vitamix and dumped it on a countertop. It’s wonderful. More fun and less flensing than Idler Wheel, but still toothy as shit. Got bite. Got little shrieks. Got dog barks. Pitchfork gave it a rare 10, if you care about that sort of thing.

I remember how I found Fiona Apple. I mean, I didn’t “discover” her and give her to the world or anything. I was working in college for a coffee house — Dillworth, in Charlotte, NC — and we of course played a lot of “coffee house” music. (Think, y’know, Lilith Fair and weird jazz.) We would get random CD deliveries from… honestly, I’ve no idea who. Music companies? Demons? Whatever. They’d deliver weekly stacks of CDs and nine times out of ten they were half-shit. But one time, in the stack came Tidal. And I was working a shift with my good friend and roommate Jim at the time, and we put it in and… I dunno how many times during our shift we listened to it, but I knew it made me feel the same way I felt when I listened to, say, Portishead’s Dummy. And we were like, fuck this, this is too good for the coffee house. So, we took it. And listened to it constantly. Her work since then has been a journey, each album still irrevocably her, but each album also very much its own creature.

I aspire to have my books be that, by the way. I never found genre to be a thing I wanted to be trapped in, or by, but I also want you to read one of my novels and know it’s one of mine, and have it feel like I’m my own damn genre, even if the genre is sci-fi, or horror, or fantasy, or whatfuckingever. Which also is why I can see how some people bristled at the Aftermath series — I mean, besides the usual shitbirds who had problems with the ahh, “content” in terms of who is allowed on the page. But I remember reading a forum post at one point where someone lamented, “Doesn’t he [i.e. me] understand, all we read are Star Wars novels?” and that clarified a lot of things for me. I wasn’t just writing a Star Wars novel. I couldn’t. I had to still write a “me” novel, otherwise, what’s the fucking point? It’s my name on it, too. I have to own it. And that’s my feeling on all my books — that’s me on there, that’s my name, it has to be all of what I bring to the table. Which then makes me think, what are all the authorial things I’m bringing to the table without realizing it? Common themes, but also lazy bits? Hmm. Worth more study. When I’m not trapped in lockdown. This fragile era is not the best time for putting the self under the lens, maybe. Or maybe it is. Who knows.

Oh, to explain the aforementioned dog barks. Yeah, no, it literally has dog barks in it, the new album. It’s the perfect lockdown quarantine album. Because it feels like she just recorded it all last night, in a binge, in her house. (I think she actually did record a lot of it in her house.) Her dogs sometimes bark. It’s amazing. (And for the record, I know she didn’t just record it last night. Its chaos is far too artful — the power of it being in how it feels improvised and mad, but is no such thing. It is her design.)

Pennsylvania is champing at the bit to “reopen.” Which is, at this point, delusional, but never underestimate people’s ability to misread a moment. See, here in PA things aren’t as “bad” as people thought, so like the Y2k bug, you have people claiming it’s either a hoax or that people got it “wrong,” despite the fact that PA arguably did a lot more a lot earlier, and has since clamped down on some of the worst of things. (Also don’t forget, we’re still not testing like we should be. So the true numbers are wildly unclear.) To reopen everything, you gotta go slow, methodical, and increase testing or get antibody testing in play. But you have the local Republicans just wanting to hee-haw their way into kicking the doors open for everyone to come rushing in, back to business. Which will cause a certain spike and surge, because, a-duhhh, the virus didn’t magically go away. Listen, I want shit to get back to normal, too. But we cannot just ignore experts and embrace magical thinking just because we want businesses open. We need better leadership from the top that helps people weather this storm in a way that doesn’t just toss vulnerable folks into the pyre in the name of Mammon, for Chrissakes.

Just the same, I guess we’re doing okay here. I got yeast, thanks to a friend who did a driveby driveway drop-off. We stood 20 feet apart and yelled conversations to one another. It was both nice and super weird. With yeast, I guess I’ll now try my hand at bread like every other carboloading individual out there. If you have good bread recipes, hook me up, because I’ve zero idea what I’m doing.

We have VR, an Oculus Quest, and it’s great. This should be the Quest’s shining moment, because VR actually feels a little bit like an escape (and you can see how Ready Player One actually comes to be). But the supply chain is disrupted and the Quest is hard to get at a meaningful price so, oops. But there are some truly spectacular experiences for it. I need the new Half-Life, but it isn’t on Quest natively, and I don’t have a PC that will load or run it. Is now a good time to get back into PC gaming? Probably not, and yet, I wanna? Because I’m an idiot?

Speaking of apples, since apparently I like anything with the word “apple” in it: did you see about the lost apples, rediscovered? Or there’s this video of an apple detective. Which is what I wanna be when I grow up. I’ll be DETECTIVE COXWORTH “GOLDEN DELICIOUS” PIPPIN, aka “Doc Pippin” for short. I will solve all the apple mysteries. This is my design.

Got me a birthday next week. In the middle of all this, a fuckin’ birthday. That should be illegal. Also illegal: our current autocratic government ineptly and cruelly stomping on all our norms and freedoms. But also, the birthday thing.

Maybe next week I can announce a cool thing? Maybe I can tell you about one of my secret books. Maybe. We’ll see. No promises. Time is goopy. Everything is wet paint.

And now, a bird photo. It’s an oafish cardinal yelling HEY at you. And not a friendly hey but like a HEY QUIT LEANIN ON MY CAR, YOU JABRONI.

Being Broken In Half (But Wanting To Be Whole)

Here is the difficulty for me, and maybe also for you: despite all of what’s going on, life continues to exist. It goes on. It doesn’t need my approval to do so, or yours, and will brook no interpolations or injunctions. Life progresses. It does so for us, and it does so for others, and as such, those others often need us. We have dependents. We have pets. We have spouses. We have friends and family and we have that guy we locked in our cellar and we have ourselves, and all of them need us in some way. They need us to be there, to be strong, and we need them to be strong, too.

But we’re not strong, not right now.

We’re all hobbling about on a pair of broken legs, emotionally speaking.

We’re operating, at best, at half-past half-ass. I mean, okay, sure, I know some people who are like, WOWZA I’M REALLY GETTING SHIT DONE, I’M SUPER PRODUCTIVE, I JUST WROTE A BOOK AND CLEANED MY HOUSE TIP TO TAINT AND BOY HOWDY I’M LIVING MY BEST QUARANTIMES, BABY, but those people are

a) sociopaths

b) lying

or c) unaware that they are repressing some grave emotional reckoning that is about to rise up on them like a tsunami made of angry ghosts and wreckst themselves before they checkst themselves.

Assuming you’re not one of those people, you are instead a person who feels a little like Frodo after he was stabbed by the Morgul blade — you’re not dead, not exactly, but you’re passing into some spectral realm, and all you really want right now is for some brave elf lady to ride up and take you to a mythical city where you can just get some goddamn rest. And then you can get up and go home. Except, even after that you can’t get up and go home because you have a burden to carry. You have that fucking goddamn ring. And other people are looking to you to carry it, even though you are clearly not at your best. Hell, other people are hoping you’re the brave elf lady who will carry them across a river to safety. And you’re hoping they’re the brave elf lady and — well, you get the point, I guess. The shit’s not over even when it’s over. Life goes on. So does the burden.

The question is, for me and also for you, how do you balance it? How do you be there for others, and be there for yourself, when you barely feel like you’re there at all?

I wanna be upfront: I don’t know the answer to this. It’s a fucking riddle to me, too.

I’m trying to suss it out, though. I know that as a writer — and I suspect a lot of other creatives are aware of this balancing act — I have to constantly find the sweet spot between self-care and bullshit excuses. In other words, there’s this interstitial realm where I am both being kind to myself and recognizing my limits while also, in recognizing those limits, I push myself to them, and sometimes beyond them when it is most appropriate. It’s like running: I run a gentle minimum of mileage but also know that whenever possible I am to push past that minimum, often by a considerable amount if I’m up for it. It’s this weird balancing act of knowing when to be good to yourself and knowing when you’re being too good, so good that you have actually made it bad. (To explain this in a different way, you should treat yourself to ice cream once in a while, but you can’t make it breakfast, lunch, dinner, or I’m pretty sure you’ll just die. A bloated corpse, leaking melted vanilla.)

(There are worse ways to go, though, I guess.)

And so I wonder if there’s a lesson in that, here. Some general awareness of knowing that I can’t half-ass it, but I also will definitely not be able to whole-ass it, much as I want to. Of knowing that for myself and others I have to be both kind in every direction, but also know when to push on myself to get done what needs doing. Let’s call it “three-quarter-assing it.” Like, no way I’m at a hundred percent, but people also need me to be better than 50%, so here I am, pushing when I can push, and hoping that gentleness and understanding will get us the rest of the way. It’s like my kid with distance learning. No fucking way is he going to be operating at top effectiveness because this is nowhere near normal for him — it’s like he’s learning inside a fishbowl. This shit doesn’t even feel real half the time. As if it’s all some manner of bizarre simulation.

So, I don’t have any advice. Except to be gentle on yourself and everyone, but also to be there in whatever capacity you can be. We don’t simply lay supine upon the ground waiting for rain to fill our mouths and float us down the drain to the land of the sewer clowns, but we also don’t get up and run. We hobble, we walk, we heal. We help others do the same and hope they do that for us, too.

I say this feels like a slow-motion 9/11, but 9/11 at least gave us the grace to have it happen and then go through the stages of grief and mourning. Here we are, trapped in them, not really progressing through them but violently lurching from one to another and back to the beginning. We’ve no idea how this ends, we just keep going. It ends someday, somehow, but what day, and what how?

Onward, onward, ever onward.

None of this is an answer, I realize. This probably doesn’t help. But it’s the challenge for me right now, and maybe it’s the challenge for you, too. I think we just have to recalibrate our expectations while… still having expectations. Because having expectations is, in its strange way, a form of optimism and hope, isn’t it? That anyone will need anything from us now or ever is recognition that the world still exists, that life goes on, and that while normal has gone all fucky, we are humans with needs who are interspersed with other humans who have needs. Things have changed. But we’re still here.

And I’m glad you’re here.

All of you.

Except you, in the back row. You know who you are. Gordon.

Here now, are my dogs, because if I can give you nothing, I at least have them to parade about.

Disjecta Membra: 3

Once again I return not with a single blog post (because I can barely concentrate enough to manage that feat), but a prismatic one — a single blog post broken up into fragmented, colored beams. Please to enjoy. Or don’t. Don’t enjoy things. No obligations.

A good portion of my day is now spent as a digital hunter-gatherer. I eyeball our supply and try to loosely plan meals and such and then I’m like, I DON’T THINK WE HAVE ENOUGH EGGS OH FUCK OH FUCK and then I realize Easter is coming and so I spend an hour doing some kind of Internet deep dive trying to source local eggs, and I make a bunch of phone calls and then, boom, I get two dozen eggs and the day is saved. Until the next crisis. Do I have enough toilet paper? I better go check again, oh shit, oh shit. Can I wipe my ass with tree bark or an errant squirrel? Should I have some kind of toilet-side shower pail, a tabo?

Last night, part of my huntering-gathering was about cocktail ingredients. I know. I know. That is probably not healthy? I promise I’m not drinking any more, I’m just not drinking any less — zing! Ahem. No, it’s just, we have a lot of base spirits. I’m well-stocked on gin and whiskey and such, but then, things to mix? Not so much. And yes, you can drink whiskey straight, and I do, but these days I am a fancy man who sometimes likes to add in various syrups and occult reagents to my drinky-dranks. Or tonic, at least. I think tonic makes gin medicine. Right? Whatever.

An interesting side effect is our buying has moved almost explicitly local. By which I mean, a lot of what we’re getting (particularly regarding food) is coming from local providers, makers, growers, farmers, etc. — like, meat from local farmers, veggies/fruits from an upcoming CSA, apples (and hard apple cider) from a local orchard, oatmeal and flour from a local mill (!), sourdough starter from a local pizza place, bread from a local bread place, all deliverable or curbside. I say this again as a very privileged person: a 20-minute drive will put me at one of at least seven proper grocery stores, and that’s not including all the growers and farmer markets, which are considerable. I live in the opposite of a food desert. I don’t say any of this as a moral lesson, only noting the interesting shift in where our stuff is coming from. As a plus, what we are getting seems to be of a measurably higher quality. Again: privilege speaking, and not for much more money. Sometimes less, actually, with veggies and fruits. But our grocery stores are becoming erratic in their supply. I’m to understand this isn’t because the supply isn’t there, but chains are either broken or rearranging, so there’s gonna be some instability. Turbulence ahead in every direction, so onward we go, seat-belts tightened right the fuck up.

I should do another post about Animal Crossing. It’s getting all French Guyana up in my island. Except with more rampant capitalism.

I have a secret book. I just got edits for it. I’m excited about it but it does mean I’m gonna have to muster up some will to do proper work.

Actually, I have three secret books. No, wait, four. Not trying to humble brag, I actually lost count. None of them are announced yet. Publishing involves a whole lot of waiting. Especially now, when everybody’s just, SHRUG, I DUNNO WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING NOW.

People are losing their jobs in everywhere, and in publishing, too. It helps if you can buy a book. And if you can’t, taking one out from a digital library loan is good, too.

One by one you start to know more and more people who are getting The Virus. And you start to know people who are dead from it, too. Not just names you know, or people online, but real people. A lot older. But not all of them.

I think the most vicious bites this Virus takes are the ones regarding loneliness. It’s not enough that we are forced into relative isolation, but worse, if you get “the Cove,” you end up quarantined. And then if you die from it, you die alone. And when you die alone from it, you also have no funeral. None can gather to see you off into the beyond. You’re alone from snout to tail of this thing. On a boat, drifting out to sea, into the mist, until you’re gone.

Hang this on the GOP’s neck like a cursed albatross. All of it. Trump. McConnell. Every salivating little goblin in their crew. This is on them.

Sorry, that got dark. But I mean, it’s gonna, sometimes. It’s a pandemic. One made worse by intervention that is both ignorant and malevolent.

I feel like I wanna podcast or something. But I don’t know what the fuck it’d even be about. Certainly me and Carboni could fire up the Ragnatalk van again. (Here I’ll note that before I moved, we had been working on a rewatch of Avengers: Endgame. But now I’m like, is that inappropriate? Or extra appropriate?) I thought about doing a writing talk podcast, but do I even have the juice for that, mentally? It feels a bit like “rearranging the Titanic’s deck chairs” to try to focus on just talking about HEY HERE’S HOW YOU DO WRITE GOOD when the world is falling apart. Hmm. Not sure. More thought necessary. Or I’ll just sit and stare at the wall. There’s your podcast. It’s just me sighing and grumbling, ASMR-style.

Wanderers is still on sale. Still $3.99 if you’re so inclined. *stares*

So, it’s Biden. I wanted Warren. Was good with Bernie. Biden’s low on my list, but I’d vote for him over Trump any day. I mean, I’d vote for a pile of raccoons stuffed into a scarecrow over Trump, because I don’t hate myself and I don’t hate this country. So, I’m voting for the Supreme Court. For the environment. I’m voting because Biden is someone you can hold to the fire, and Trump isn’t. And one good thing about Biden I like is, I don’t think he wants this job. I don’t think he relishes it. That’s a plus to me. Regardless, I hope he picks a helluva running mate.

Fuck your lawns. Your lawns are a wasteland of nature. Here’s a good article, and it interviews rewilding advocate (and oh, also excellent novelist) Jeff Vandermeer. We did it last year at our last house and had a bumper crop of fireflies and a fox family take up residence. Gonna try it here and see how it goes. Will also try to plant a lot of natives when we have access to those plants, but not sure how I get them now. You might have a HOA that’s a dick about this sort of thing, but this might be a good time to try to push for changes — or just cough a lot anytime a HOA rep tries to get to your front porch. Maybe they’ll get eaten by whatever you have growing there, now.

I have a lot of new birds at the house. Birds I’ve not seen before. Let’s see, here’s a quick catalog for the four of you who care: Eastern towhee, Eastern bluebird, Carolina wren, golden-crowned kinglet, downy woodpecker, hairy woodpecker, red-bellied woodpecker, yellow-bellied sapsucker, Northern flicker, tufted titmice, black-cap chickadees, nuthatches, chipping sparrow, white-throated sparrow, song sparrow, tree swallow, Cooper’s hawk, red-tailed hawk, black vultures, turkey vultures, robins, cardinals, pine warbler, red-winged blackbirds, scarlet tanager (not seen this season, but in fall), blue jay, cowbirds, catbirds (also not yet seen this year), uhhh, let’s see, brown thrasher, gray junco, house wren, and there’s probably more? Anyway. Here, have some birbsnaps, bye.

Corry L. Lee: Five Things I Learned Writing Weave The Lightning

Empire. Revolution. Magic.

Gerrit is the son of Bourshkanya’s Supreme-General. Despite his powerful storm-affinity and the State’s best training, he can’t control his magic. To escape the brutal consequences, he flees.

Celka is a travelling circus performer, hiding both her link to the underground and her storm-affinity from the prying eyes of the secret police. But Gerrit’s arrival threatens to expose everything: her magic, her family, and the people they protect.

The storms have returned, and everything will change.

***

People can believe in terrible things.

I wanted Weave the Lightning’s government to be scary—secret police bursting into your house in the middle of the night kind of scary. But that has a lot of wiggle room. In an early draft, I explored a Soviet-style dictatorship where it didn’t matter how clear your party affiliation, you could still be targeted and everyone lived in fear. This created an obvious villain, but it also left basically no one “good” on the dictator’s side.

I discovered it’s more interesting when people have good reasons take different sides. (I mean, maybe they’re not Good reasons with a capital ‘G’, but at least understandable ones.)

This led me to a fascist state, where plenty of zealots believe the party line. They support the regime not out of fear of what happens if they don’t but because they believe. Maybe they think they’ll get something out of it, maybe they have a grudge against the people the regime is villainizing, maybe they just want to belong and they see the regime as a powerful force they can be part of. Regardless, there’s a strong belief that the regime is right, that it’s necessary. It may not be pretty, but what can you do when enemies are breathing down your neck?

The trick then was figuring out the kind of character who could have been steeped in that belief but have a chance to escape it. What would it take to kick the State’s conditioning? How would that belief erode, and what would it leave behind?

In Weave the Lightning, this character is Gerrit. He’s the youngest son of the Supreme-General, and he’s a mage trained in a top military academy. But he never managed to gain his father’s respect, and he can’t help challenging stupid orders. When the ability to create new magic returns to the world, some serious shit starts to go down, and it sets Gerrit on a path of questioning his deeply engrained beliefs. This leads to an interesting journey and a complex character—a richness I lacked when the regime was just the Big Bad.

People are complicated; so, too, magic.

Complex magic makes my brain sing. I love when the magic feels organic, an outgrowth of nature with deep roots. People work to understand it—they come up with theories, and those theories yield practical results. But as with science, we don’t know everything. There’s always more to discover.

Magic has one up on technology, in my opinion, in that it can be personal. With tech, you press a button and your computer turns on; it doesn’t matter if you’re in the right headspace. With magic, it’s not necessarily so easy—and from this, organic complexity can arise.

Building in this personal element, however, turns out to be… challenging. I describe the details of my magic system on my website, but one central element is the “neighboring reality” where magic is formed, a place of needs and ideas and emotion. It appears as a full-blown alternate world for those strong enough to see it but, because it arises from the mage’s internal landscape, it’s different for everyone.

This turned out to be a pain in the ass. It’s cool, don’t get me wrong. I love how it makes magic deeply personal. But inventing complex characters is hard enough on its own; digging into their psychology to manifest their emotional world… oof. Sometimes I hate past Corry.

Sometimes, you just have to explain.

Writers are often warned about the perils of exposition. “Show, don’t tell” is the knee-jerk adage. But sometimes, you really do need to tell.

Figuring out the right balance is hard—not least because the balance is different for everyone. I personally like figuring things out from subtle incluing. I’ve also been reading spec fic since I could sound out words on the page, so I have a vast cannon I can call on to understand new worlds, and I love when tropes are turned on their heads. Other readers may not work that way. One fabulous writer my year at the Odyssey Writing Workshop (which is specifically for spec fic writers) didn’t know that to kill a zombie you had to destroy their brain.  People have gaps.

It is perhaps unsurprising, then, that my early drafts of Weave the Lightning suffered from a complex magic system and an (utter) lack of reader hand-holding. I got better. I learned that exposition, when used sparingly, is a wonderful tool.

I still trust my reader to figure things out alongside my characters… I’ve just added enough waypoints to make it so they can.

And for readers who prefer an explanation up front, I put a magic primer on my website.

Break open your reveals.

I live for narrative moments when characters discover that things not what they believed—the surprising reveal that slots everything before it into place; the discovery that flings a character on a new path. I planned several for Weave the Lightning, and they were awesome. My readers were going to love them.

When an early critique said, “Gerrit doesn’t have time to react to [awesome reveal],” I was confused. That reveal set him on a new course! It changed everything about how he viewed his life before! What did she mean he didn’t have time to react? Clearly that comment was garbage.

It took me over a year to understand. When I did, it blew my mind and reshaped the book.

What my clever friend (Kate Alice Marshall, whose books I highly recommend) was trying to tell me was that I had a multi-stage reveal smashed into a single moment. Gerrit discovered something really big about his past, but that discovery came at the same time as he learned something else plot-shaking. I had done something similar with Celka later in the book. Because I had conceived of each “reveal” all at once, I saw each as a single point, when in reality they were complex. (As a physicist, I feel I should use the analogy of an atom that seems indivisible until you reach higher energies and discover it is actually made of protons, neutrons, and electrons. And those, in turn, are composed of…)

Getting back to reveals…

By unknotting the multiple threads that made up each reveal, my characters could uncover clues and piece them together throughout the story, building up to those earth-shattering moments. This gave them space to react to each component of the reveal (you’re welcome, Kate), and brought the reader along for the ride.

It’s okay to trash a draft.

And trash it again. And again.

I have this dream that one day I’ll write a book and I won’t end up throwing the whole thing away and rewriting from a blank page. *wistful sigh*

Like many daydreams, in my heart of hearts, I’m not sure I believe it.

I hear other authors talk about writing their first draft, doing some minor revisions, and publishing it. I’m not that writer. Often I wish I was. It seems so much simpler, so much more efficient! If only I could plan things out well enough ahead of time, maybe I could become that writer!

Bah.

I number my revisions like software. Version 2.3 is, for example, the third major rewrite (I start at version 0), with its fourth minor rewrite. When I blow the whole thing up, it gets a new version number. Weave the Lightning reached version 9.

And that’s okay.

***

Corry L. Lee is a science fiction and fantasy writer, Ph.D. physicist, award-winning science educator, data geek, and mom. Weave the Lightning is her debut novel. Her science fiction short story “Shutdown” won the Writers of the Future award.

In Ph.D. research at Harvard, she shed light on the universe fractions of a second after the Big Bang. At Amazon, she connected science to technology, improving customer experience through online experimentation.

Everything Corry does, she does with intensity. Currently, she’s obsessed with cross-country skiing, French pop music, and single origin coffee.

Corry L. Lee: Website | Twitter

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