Chuck Wendig: Terribleminds

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Swati Teerdhala: Five Things I Learned While Writing The Archer at Dawn

A stolen throne. A lost princess. A rescue mission to take back what’s theirs.

For Kunal and Esha, finally working together as rebels, the upcoming Sun Mela provides the perfect guise for infiltrating King Vardaan’s vicious court. Kunal returns to his role as dedicated soldier, while Esha uses her new role as adviser to Prince Harun to seek allies for their rebel cause. A radical plan is underfoot to rescue Jansa’s long-lost Princess Reha—the key to the throne.

But amidst the Mela games and glittering festivities, much more dangerous forces lie in wait. With the rebel’s entry into Vardaan’s court, a match has been lit, and long-held secrets will force Kunal and Esha to reconsider their loyalties—to their countries and to each other.

Getting into the palace was the easy task; coming out together will be a battle for their lives. In book two of Swati Teerdhala’s epic fantasy trilogy, a kingdom will fall, a new ruler will rise, and all will burn.

***

THERE’S A REASON WHY PEOPLE STICK TO ONE POV

My first book, THE TIGER AT MIDNIGHT, has dual POVs and it came to me pretty naturally. I had a clear idea for each of their storylines and it was overall an organic process. Not so for THE ARCHER AT DAWN. This book required me to meticulously plan out every step in both Kunal and Esha’s individual journeys in a fairly painstaking fashion, making sure that they had individual character arcs that merged with the plot––and with each other’s arcs. At the end, however, I had a truly intertwined and unique story that I realized only could have been achieved by planning it from the perspective of dual POVs.

HEISTS ARE HARD

I don’t know about you, but I always wanted to write a heist of some sort, especially after seeing Danny Ocean smooth talk his way to stealing a whole casino in Ocean’s Eleven (yes, I know it didn’t exactly work like that). But heists in films and heists in literature are two different beasts. I ended up doing a twist on a heist, a people heist, if you will. And it was one of the most difficult parts of the plot to figure out. Heists are hard! Especially in a fantasy world. But scribbling furiously onto large notepads and creating multiple excel sheets helps. Also, watching lots and lots of heist movies.

SECOND BOOKS ARE FERAL THINGS

Sure everyone tells you that second books are hard, but it isn’t until you actually try to write one that you understand the unique pain that is trying to wrangle a second book. THE ARCHER AT DAWN’s first draft came out as a tangled, snarling mess of words and it was my job to wade through and find the story. It was definitely there but at points it felt like the story didn’t want me to find it. I was in a constant battle between the story it wanted to be and the story I thought I needed to tell. It wasn’t until I let go and listened that I was able to tame the story and make it into a real book.

SECOND BOOKS ARE ALSO MAGICAL

Yes, second books are hard. But there’s also a certain magic to being able to dive back into a world and into the lives of characters you already know. Writing THE ARCHER AT DAWN allowed me to dive into my characters’ lives and backstories. To write them having special, hilarious moments with each other that they wouldn’t have had in the first book. It’s like when you reach the next stage in friendship with a new person. You’re past all the stilted conversations and slightly awkward coffee dates and finally on to the good stuff–the emotional rewatches of your favorite teen movies, the late night drinks pondering the vagaries of the universe. That’s the magic of a second book.

NO ONE WRITES ALONE

The typical image of a writer is alone at their desk, typing or scribbling away furiously as inspiration pours out of them and onto the page. We all know the latter is untrue and just rude, but the idea of the solitary nature of writing has endured. It’s romantic in a way, I suppose. But none of my books, and certainly not THE ARCHER AT DAWN, would exist in their form without the support and help of my many writer friends. They were the ones who helped me brainstorm a new way to tackle a plot hole or encouraged me when I was absolutely sure my deadline was out to murder me. And while I’ve always loved my writer group, I learned to truly and deeply appreciate them after writing THE ARCHER AT DAWN.

***

Swati Teerdhala is a storyteller at heart. After graduating from the University of Virginia with a BS in finance and BA in history, she tumbled into the marketing side of the technology industry. She’s passionate about many things, including how to make a proper cup of tea, the right ratio of curd to crust in a lemon tart, and diverse representation in the stories we tell. The Tiger at Midnight is her debut novel. She currently lives in New York City. You can visit her online at www.swatiteerdhala.com.

Swati Teerdhala: Website | Twitter

Archer At Dawn: Harper Collins

Steven Spohn: We’re Not Going Anywhere

Steve Spohn is a friend and an inspiration, and he’s always welcome at this blog. Give it up for him:

***

I have a sad, pathetic life as a terminally ill, profoundly disabled man who uses a power wheelchair and lives on a ventilator, according to the Internet. I mean, most of it is true; I am profoundly disabled, born with Spinal Muscular Atrophy (SMA), and it is a terminal illness. I do use a wheelchair that’s more expensive than most BMWs–$56,000 according to my insurance–and I do use a ventilator.

But my life is anything but sad and pathetic.

***

In February, I was scheduled to go to Austin, Texas, for SXSW to accept an award for my advocacy work championing people with disabilities in the videogame space. They called it “Champion of Change.” Fancy title, right?

Sadly, that wasn’t meant to be. The world had started shutting down. A new virus had come along, which we didn’t know a lot about, but it was definitely worse than the common flu. All we knew was that things were terrible, people were dying, and someone on a ventilator has a much more difficult fight against this new invisible opponent.

The news came in fast and furious. All of a sudden, I found myself being tossed into a new category of “the 3%.” But it wasn’t like the fun “3%” like the ones who hold all the wealth in the world where I would get woken up every morning on an aircraft-carrier-sized yacht floating in international waters by a violin player gradually raising me from my slumber in my 24 ft.² waterbed covered in the feathers of the last remaining dodo bird so that I can be spoonfed cornflakes made of real 24 karat gold.

No. This 3% was much less fun. I was suddenly a part of the disposable 3% of immunocompromised individuals who were sick with underlying conditions and “probably going to die soon anyway.”

Like all Tales from the Internet, some people were exceedingly kind; some people were not. But the flavor of the unkind comments was…. Different. Most trolls will make fun of my weight, disability, or the fact that I like listening to Taylor Swift. These, however, focused on something different: the value of my life.

I’ve been an advocate for 15 years, and I’ve been disabled for the entirety of my life. Having to fight to prove I have value as a human being is not something new for me. Almost everyone who has gazed into my intoxicatingly blue (humble brag) eyes still acknowledges that I’m a real human being with feelings and aspirations, even if they don’t want me as a(n) employee, lover, friend, etc.

After all, I have a life, and that’s worth something.

For a solid month, I heard celebrities, politicians, military personnel, civilians, and people in between suddenly questioning if shutting down the country was worth saving the lives of people like me. The worst of them were tweeting me directly that saving my life and the lives of people like me was not worth any inconvenience to their everyday routines.

As you might imagine, having that thrown at you repeatedly has quite a taxing effect on your mental health. Yet, life for me really isn’t that much different than it was before the epic lockdown. My days out have gone from twice a week to zero. And my home care nurses are wearing masks 24/7. Other than that, it’s pretty much life as usual. You know, besides the whole “somebody coughing on me could kill me” thing.

But beating the odds is not something new for me. I’ve been called into a WWE cage match more than once, and I’ve come out victorious every time. How? Technology!

When I was very young, a severe flu put me in the hospital. Things got so bad that I ended up on the ventilator for the first time. It was horrifying. Imagine a nine-year-old trying to comprehend, deal with, and accept that I would never breathe on my own again.

Luckily for me, Children’s Hospital of Pittsburgh had an inter-hospital videogame system explicitly set up to encourage children to lean on each other for support. They created a virtual paradise full of palm trees, sunshine, and an oasis in the middle of rolling green hills and sand as far as you could see. Flowing into the sanctuary was a waterfall where I would meet a lovely pink star. She was my everything. We talked for hours every single day. We would commiserate, complain, and share stories of our favorite memories, including our pets!

Thanks to my inpatient best friends, Vicodin and Morphine, I don’t know exactly how many times we met, only that it was a lot. And in the end, I continued visiting long after that beautiful pink star stopped shining in that magical, virtual place.

***

I go into this and an entire 10-minute story about the time I wanted my mom to let me go on my new YouTube channel, which sounds like a plug (and it is, go subscribe, it’s free), but more precisely, it’s another part of the technology that is saving my life. I started this channel during the Flatten the Curve initiative as a way to help me follow my dreams while life tries to crush them. I had planned to start making the pivot to become an inspirational speaker this year. I’d rather be out on the circuit doing talks and inspiring audiences. However, fate will not allow that until there is a vaccine. But in the meantime, I can hone my skills, making videos from the speeches I want to give.

See, technology is as much the hero as the villain in my story. Twitter makes me feel bad sometimes, but it’s also the reason I’ve been able to meet and hang out with cool people like Chuck. I’ve gotten to have conversations with The Rock, Ryan Reynolds, Gary Whitta, and so many cool people. Without Twitter and Twitch, despite all of their flaws, my social life would not exist, and I doubt my career would either.

YouTubes allows me to continue chasing my dreams despite a nightmare level virus that’s wreaking havoc on the world.

Being a Partner on Twitch allows me to build a community of positivity and laughter, full of amazing people that keep my social life alive and my creativity flowing.

Google’s texting via computer is what allowed me to start texting (the adult kind and the kind talking about chicken nuggets) because I can’t hold or use a regular cell phone.

Assistive technology transforms my Rocket Raccoon hat into a videogame controller capable of enabling me to play video games. And without access to those technologies, who knows where I would be? Certainly not on a red carpet at the biggest show in the video game industry.

KX9A5B The Game Awards 2017 at Microsoft Theater – Arrivals Featuring: Steven Spohn Where: Los Angeles, California, United States When: 07 Dec 2017 Credit: Tony Forte/WENN

On May 21, 2020, we celebrated Global Accessibility Awareness Day (GAAD) — a fantastic day that brings attention to technologies used by millions of disabled people around the world.

When I started this story, I told you my life is not sad or pathetic. Thanks to advocates fighting for accessibility in technology, I lead a terribly wonderful life full of dreams, aspirations, and hope.

Disabled people like me are just people like anyone else, worthy of love, laughter, and a bunch of cookies. We are not disposable. And indeed not a 3% statistic to be written off as a rounding error. We are each unique and individual.  Disabled people can be helpful, mean, kind, selfish, generous, prickly, fabulous, and/or any other adjective you can imagine. Each of us has our own goals. Some of us are chasing fame and fortune, and some of us are just trying to live life. No matter what we choose, it’s no different than the lives of our non-disabled friends.

When you see someone with a disability, don’t let yourself feel bad for them. Don’t let Internet trolls or Facebook heroes tell you that our lives suck. Our lives are more difficult in many ways. That’s true. If you think wearing a mask is a hassle, you’re not going to love using a ventilator; I can promise you that.

Carry forward the mantra: Everyone’s life is every bit as valid and as important as anyone else’s.

Me? Well, I do have a terminal illness, and I’m well aware of it. But I use technology to keep pushing forward and do what I can to make a difference in the world.

I will continue fighting against ableism and promote acceptance for disabled people in mainstream culture. But it’s not a battle that I fight alone. There are many cool advocates with disabilities living their lives publicly so that we might inspire others in the right way. Not by merely getting out of bed in the morning, but by doing really cool stuff.

To you, my lovely reader, I ask you to go out of your way to find disabled content creators that speak to you. If it’s me, cool, I hope you’ll click one of the numerous plugs that Chuck totally didn’t notice above (love you) and follow my journey (Hi Lin-Manuel Miranda).

But maybe I’m not for you. I can be loud on Twitter, sarcastic on Twitch, and hey, that’s perfectly okay if you’re not into that. My name isn’t Neo. I’m not The One. I’m One of Many, many people with disabilities representing our community.

Find disabled people putting out messages of positivity and inclusion that you feel resonate in YOUR soul. Invite them to be members of your tribe. Follow them. Amplify their words and give them a chance that many in society have not: the opportunity to be seen. Whether you have three followers on Insta, 400 on Facebook, or 2,000,000 on Twitter, you can help us “normalize” being disabled.

Thanks to technology, we’re out here. And we’re not going anywhere.

Eliot Peper: Five Things I Learned Writing Veil

When her mother dies in a heat wave that kills twenty million, Zia León abandons a promising diplomatic career to lead humanitarian aid missions to regions ravaged by drought, wildfires, and sea level rise.

What Zia doesn’t know is that clandestine forces are gathering around her in pursuit of a colossal secret: someone has hijacked the climate, and the future of human civilization is at stake.

To avoid a world war that appears more inevitable every day, Zia must build a coalition of the powerless and attempt the impossible. But success depends on facing the grief that has come to define her life, and rediscovering friendship, family, and what it means to be true to yourself while everything falls apart.

* * *

Follow Your Curiosity

A few years ago, I listened to a podcast interview with award-winning journalist Charles C. Mann in which he described scientists researching how to intentionally manipulate the global climate to offset the worst impacts of climate change.

While geoengineering proposals range from seeding the oceans with bacteria to sucking carbon dioxide directly from the air, only one approach is practical with today’s technology. You fly planes into the stratosphere and spray inert dust that makes the Earth ever so slightly shinier, reflecting a tiny bit more incoming sunlight back into space, thus reducing the amount of energy entering the Earth system and cooling the planet. The kicker is that it would only cost two billion dollars a year to offset the current rate of global warming. That means that any country and even a few wealthy individuals could decide to create such a program all on their own.

This scenario raises so many questions that will define the coming century: what does it mean to exist within an environment in which we ourselves are the primary agent of change? What will the future look like when technologies like nuclear weapons, CRISPR, the internet, and geoengineering can give a single human being the power to literally change the world? How can we harness our own natures in order to leverage such technologies to actually make the world better?

Holy shit, I thought. Someone needs to write a novel about this.

And Veil was born.

Don’t Try to Be Original

The more I learned about the science of geoengineering, the more I pressured myself to construct a story as intricate as the climatology models I was reading about. Part of it was wanting to honor the source material, but there was also a less honorable aspect: wanting to impress readers with an original science fictional take on an important issue.

We’ve all experienced the joy of appreciating a truly original work of art—something that opens new worlds for us. But is the originality we experience the result of the creator striving to be original? My best work emerges when my ego gets out of the way, when a story flows onto the page as if I am no more than a conduit. Veil refused to get going until I stopped trying to be clever and just wrote what seemed obvious.

Don’t try to be original. Just do what comes naturally. Others will call what comes naturally from you “original” because *you* are its source, your nature informed it. But you know the secret: you did what was obvious, and that’s what made it inspired.

Don’t Let Routine Get In Your Way

As we shelter in place to flatten the curve of a global pandemic, it feels like a lifetime ago, but last year at this time my wife and I were embarking on a pilgrimage. The Camino de Santiago is an ancient pilgrimage route, a network of paths across Europe that lead to the purported resting place of St. James in Santiago de Compostela. My wife and I aren’t religious (only about half of the pilgrims we met were Catholic), but we love walking, and over the course of five weeks, we hiked five hundred miles along the mountainous northern coast of Spain.

I was supposed to have finished writing Veil before we started.

I hadn’t.

So after spending all day lugging a heavy pack through pouring rain, howling wind, or baking sun, I would sit on my bunk in the converted gymnasium of a remote village albergue—volunteer-run shared sleeping quarters for pilgrims—and write a chapter, or a scene, or a sentence, before passing out.

So often, I trick myself into thinking that I can’t write unless the conditions are right: a large block of time, hitting a minimum word count, a quiet place to work, having eaten the optimal breakfast, an ample supply of inspiration, etc. But routine can hinder as well as help. I finished the rough draft of Veil on the Camino because I didn’t let routine get in my way. I wrote whenever, wherever, and however I could, and you can too.

Choose the Rollercoaster

Writing Veil was an emotional rollercoaster. Here’s the 1980’s montage version: bursting with ideas and enthusiasm—>thinking “wow, this one is different in a good way” as I whiz through the first few chapters—>insidious doubts gather in my mental shadows until—>somewhere around the halfway point I have an existential crisis that this book won’t, can’t work—>after extensive struggle, the crisis resolves into a new understanding of the story itself—>momentum builds until I’m experiencing the excitement of reading the climax even as I write it—>etc.

It turns out that this doesn’t get easier. It’s a rollercoaster I board ever time I write a new novel. The only difference experience makes is that now I know that I’m buying a ticket when I sit down to draft a new story. The rollercoaster is an integral part of my process. I choose the rollercoaster.

Realizing that the rollercoaster is a choice is crucial. It means I’m signing up to do the work. It means that when things get tough, I recognize that the struggle is the work. It means that when fear rears its ugly head, I face it—clear-eyed and even-keeled.

Find the Heart of the Story

I only ever figure out the heart of the story as I’m writing it. Rather than executing a clever plan, working through a manuscript sentence by sentence feels like hacking through dense undergrowth, following an overgrown path that might or might not lead out the other side.

As I explored this particular jungle, patterns began to emerge. Zia took on unexpected depth and started making decisions that surprised me. Her circle of friends came into focus. Strange loops connected choices, objects, locations ever more tightly—opportunities to increase the story’s density of meaning, a pocket universe reflecting itself.

But it wasn’t until a long train ride through Italy—interrupted by a wildfire on the tracks during which conductors handed out plastic water bottles to sweating passengers—that my wife posed the ultimate question: why are you writing this story in the first place?

Only by answering did I realize the answer. I was writing this story to take readers on a journey that would challenge them to reflect on life in the Anthropocene. I was writing it because the characters’ personal losses echo how we have all lost capital-n-Nature—the ability to draw a clear line between humanity and our environment. By coming up with ever more ingenious tools that extend our reach from the subatomic to the cosmic, we have lost a neat metaphor for explaining the world to ourselves. The cast had to find the courage to face their grief, to reconcile, to figure out a way forward. That is precisely the situation we find ourselves in with respect to the Earth system: we can no longer afford to pretend that our actions don’t have consequences or that it’s possible to turn back the clock. However difficult it may be, we must take responsibility for the extraordinary powers we’ve developed, and use them to build a better future together.

* * *

Eliot Peper is the author of Cumulus, True Blue, Neon Fever Dream, the Uncommon Series, and the Analog Series. His novels have been praised by the New York Times Book Review, Popular Science, San Francisco Magazine, Businessweek, io9, Boing Boing, and Ars Technica. He has helped build technology businesses, survived dengue fever, translated Virgil’s Aeneid from the original Latin, worked as an entrepreneur-in-residence at a venture capital firm, and explored the ancient Himalayan kingdom of Mustang. His writing has appeared in Harvard Business Review, the Verge,  Tor.com, TechCrunch, VICE, and the Los Angeles Review of Books, and he has been a speaker at Google, Comic Con, SXSW, Future in Review, and the Conference on World Affairs.

Eliot Peper: Website | Twitter

Veil: Amazon

Jason L. Blair: Five Things I Learned Writing Full Deck Roleplaying

A bit of a preamble, if Chuck will allow it, for those who may be wondering, “Full Deck Roleplaying? Is this a book? A game? Weird title for a novel.”

Full Deck Roleplaying is a book. And a game. It’s a tabletop roleplaying game or RPG, kinda sorta like Dungeons & Dragons which is everywhere these days. I’ve been making RPGs for almost twenty years. They’ve done well for me. They, in no small part, are responsible for my career in making video games.

Now, RPGs run the gamut as far as how they’re played and what they do. D&D is a dungeon crawl. You get together with friends and another person, the Dungeon Master, sets out challenges the players have to overcome to be heroes and get loot. Some RPGs are story engines. They are all about giving people the tools to tell engaging narratives. Some RPGs have lots of rules and some have very few. And there’s tons of options in the middle and all over the place. Tabletop roleplaying is a vast and varied landscape.

Full Deck Roleplaying is built around telling stories which might be why Chuck invited me to write something for his blog. Stories are my passion. Games are one of the ways I tell them.

In Full Deck Roleplaying, players create characters, create worlds, and create drama through the use of standard playing cards. But the cards are not just there to do your bidding. They influence the game by narrowing your choices and adding new details, forcing you to adapt to the hand that life—or at least the game—has dealt you.

You can try out Full Deck Roleplaying for absolutely free or you can kick in a few bucks if you want, no pressure. The beautifully-illustrated 66-page PDF contains the core Full Deck Roleplaying game system—setting creation, character creation, and the rules of play including handy reference sheets so you don’t have to dig for information during a session.

Full Deck Roleplaying puts the story in your hands.

What follows are five things I learned while writing this game, my first major game release in over eight years.

* * *

Write Where the Comfort Is

The past four years of my life have been defined by terrible things. I lost my brother and my father almost a year apart. (My brother died after a long battle with sepsis. I found out my dad had cancer on Christmas of that same year, he died only months later.) The top of my left femur literally started decaying and I had to have my hip replaced. I pulled up roots and yanked my family across the country away from friends and an established community for a bad career move. My recently-widowed mother relocated to be closer to us just as the studio I was at and I decided to part ways and just as I was told I was being divorced after almost 26 years. Soon after, my two kids—the light of my entire life, folks—moved back to Illinois and far far away from me.

It’s been a bad ride, friends.

Now, there have been bright spots. Even though the job didn’t work out, I met some good people there. I got to hang out with friends in the area and get to know them better. After that job and I shook hands for the final time, I was offered an opportunity at a great studio working with some fantastic people—and it’s only three hours from my kids. Plus I’m near a Trader Joe’s and that’s always nice.

But. Still. I have never carried this much pain in my life. It weighs on me every day. I feel its shadow over me in the morning and its breath on my neck at night. I never thought my life would so utterly implode. I’m still trying to find stuff amidst the debris.

I let the feelings of the past four years—all of which culminated in the greatest middle finger from the universe I’ve ever seen—keep me run into the ground for months. But one good thing came from it. Well, one good thing in regards to writing. I stopped caring about market trends and zeitgeist. I stopped caring about marketability. I started to just write. For me. I started to write where the comfort was.

In February, I wrote a Middle Grade novel that I’m currently shopping to agents. In March, I wrote a new roleplaying game that I just released in May. Those two projects may not seem to have much in common but the link there is that I wrote what I wanted. I wrote to comfort myself. In the novel, I wrote the story that came to me after my father’s passing. With the game, I wrote a system that I’d like to play. I didn’t know if anyone else would connect with it or not but it’s what I wanted. Those projects, well, I won’t say they “made me happy” but they gave me a joy I hadn’t felt in a long time.

I found a lot of comfort in both them. They were cathartic in different ways. In the novel, I got to see my father again. In the game, I got to see myself again. My younger self who took more risks and swung harder for the fences. I found a fire again. And it wasn’t the crackling embers of Hell at my feet. It was flames in my belly giving me the strength to pick up and move.

Editing is Alright

You could fill a book with chestnuts and platitudes comparing writing versus editing—and people have. Some writers love the editing process. To me, it was a necessary evil. I did it. Like I said, it’s necessary. But I didn’t enjoy it. It was rushing up river, it was playing in traffic.

But now, for whatever reason, I have found enjoyment in editing. Maybe it’s just narcissism but I like reading what I’ve written. I like rethinking how a chapter is constructed, how something is worded. I like making sure all the right seeds are planted throughout the text so, when the tree sprouts at the end, you want to sit in its shade.

I honestly don’t know what happened there. I don’t know what switch got flipped. Maybe it’s because, for the first time in ages, I feel connected to the material so revisiting it and making it stronger isn’t a chore. It’s helping a friend get better.

Routine is Nothing; Routine is Everything

I wrote the entirety of both that novel and that game in Google docs on my phone. 30,000 words on the novel. 8,000 on the game. I’m currently writing these words in a Google doc on my phone. It’s how I’ve been writing for the past eight months. I’ve written this way on my couch, in my car during lunch or in the parking lot of a grocery store, on a lumpy half-broken bed way too late at night, on the floor, on my back, on my stomach, on my side.

Which to say, anything I thought I needed to write—a comfy chair, the perfect software, the right atmosphere, the proper routine—were all excuses. What I needed was to write.

That said, the intimacy of being inches from my phone, the familiar motion of tapping letters on a screen with my thumbs became my routine. When I think of writing anymore, that’s what I think of. It’s comforting. And, most importantly, it gets the writing done.

This method didn’t come about as a personal challenge or a deliberate means to break some unhealthy writing barrier—

Actually. Well.

That’s a lie.

It came about because I was deep deep in the thrall of depression and would spend my entire evening staring at my phone, watching YouTube, checking Facebook, texting friends, and, of course, reading TerribleMinds.com, RELIGIOUSLY. I couldn’t watch TV much less sit in front of a computer and write.

But I knew I needed to do something, to distract myself if nothing else. So I gave myself a project—a book for adults about a cult deprogrammer on his last assignment. Which is weird because I see myself more as a kid lit author but I also knew I had some stuff to work through that was better suited for an adult audience. Anyway. I figured since I was staring at my phone all evening anyway, I may as well put that to use. One night, I opened up the Google docs app and started tapping away. The next night, again. The third night, the same. Then every night for a month. Multiple sprints every evening. Anywhere from 500-2000 words a night. Day after day. I didn’t want to break the streak.

I started to feel that rush. I was building momentum, chapter after chapter, and I would be up until 2a some nights writing away. The dopamine hits started coming. I was writing. After years of not doing much of nothing for myself, I was getting words down and building a story.

The routine came from that. And, y’know, writing on a phone isn’t hard. Jean-Dominique Bauby wrote The Diving Bell and the Butterfly by blinking his left eyelid. Tapping a screen is cake.

Sure, it has its frustrations. App notifications, text messages, the dreaded phone call, making sure you have enough battery, autocorrect’s helpful edits but all that can be managed. And I don’t find myself switching apps to check Twitter or Facebook but I do switch apps to quickly open Wikipedia or to Google something. I love it. Anymore, I can’t imagine writing any other way.

You Are Building Towards Something

I’ve been making games for almost twenty years. My first published effort, Little Fears, was a great setting with an okay system. In the years since, I’ve released other game books—some entirely of my own creation, some based on established systems and lines. With every release, every project, I strove to make the best book I could. There’s something different about Full Deck Roleplaying. I don’t mean that as ad-speak. There was something different in how I wrote it. Not just that I was writing for comfort, like I said above, but I felt like all the little lessons I’d learned in my years as a game designer were coming together. Full Deck Roleplaying is the culmination of everything I know about making tabletop games. And there was incredible freedom that came with that. I knew what I wanted this to be. I scrutinized every rule to make sure it was doing what it needed to do. I stripped out anything that didn’t belong. It was the first time, if not ever then in a long while, where I felt strong. A musician nailing a solo. A surgeon intuiting a procedure. It gave me a level of confidence and clarity that I had been missing for years. I didn’t feel meek. I didn’t second-guess and compromise. I had a vision and I worked hard to make something that fit that vision.

Full Deck Roleplaying is what I’ve been building towards as a game designer. And the plans I have for it are what I want to do. I see a road where nothing was before. It’s an amazing feeling.

All this is to say that, whatever it is you’re doing, you’re growing. In skill, in endurance, in wisdom. Even the work you look at it and spit on has given you something. If that something doesn’t manifest soon, it will eventually. Just keep going.

I Have the Best Friends

Okay, maybe I didn’t learn this while writing Full Deck Roleplaying. Maybe I knew it way before. But it’s certainly been made evident in the days following the game’s release.

I was blown away when Chuck asked if I wanted to do a Five Things about this little self-published game book of mine. I’ve known Chuck for about a decade now and we both come from the tabletop mines but he is all National Bestseller and Awesome Writing Advice Guy and he wrote a book that maybe caused the pandemic? I dunno. I skimmed the headline. But he’s Chuck Wendig, y’know? He’s someone that I feel awkward mentioning in the list of people I know because it sounds like a name drop. I’ve read his work. Turns out? It’s really really good. You might say he’s a Kick-Ass Writer. [ed — goddamnit, blair — c.w.]

Me, I make my living as a game designer. I make video games during the day and tabletop games at night. Sure, I have aspirations to be a novelist—and I’ve self-published a novel—but I’ve yet to make that transition to Writer With Books at Barnes & Noble or Author With a Respectable Amazon Ranking.

Still though, I was totally gonna take him up on the offer. I’d be an idiot not to. Which, I mean, I’m an idiot—but not that kind of idiot. Chuck was doing me a real solid—and he wasn’t the only one.

My friends have been spreading the word about this new game of mine, retweeting and sharing posts, talking it up to people. In 20 years of working in games—and 40+ years of working at life—I’ve made some amazing friends who have my back.

Full Deck Roleplaying may seem like just another game book. Easily made and easily ignored. Plenty of RPGs come out every day. But this game means a lot to me. It’s an attempt to crawl back from total life failure in some way that I own and control completely. I cannot overstate how wonderful my friends have been. Maybe they sensed something special in this game. Maybe they’ve kept up with what’s been going on in my life and just want to help. It doesn’t matter why. It just matters they are. I know it and I see it.

Thank you to Chuck, for the platform to reach more people and just to talk about things I usually only talk about in filtered groups on Facebook. Thank you to all my friends who have helped make navigating the River Styx that much easier. Thank you to my mom and aunt for the immeasurable support. Thank you to my kids for knowing how hard this has all been. I can’t even imagine how it’s all been for you.

Finally, thank you—YOU—for reading. I hope your friends are as wonderful as mine are. You deserve it.

* * *

Jason L Blair makes video games by day and tabletop games by night. A recent transplant to the Chicago area, he is currently enjoying the confines of his tiny apartment and longing for IKEA to reopen. In what time is left over, he likes to write Middle Grade novels and chapter books that he hopes, one day, kids of all ages will get to read. You can keep tabs on him over at JasonLBlair.com and see what kinda games he’s cooking up at FunSizedGames.com.

Jason L. Blair: Website | FunSizedGames | Twitter

Full Deck Roleplaying: DriveThruRPG

Wanderers: Now Out In Paperback

Welp, it’s out. Wanderers has landed in paperback, finally (all 800 pages of it) — the tale of mysterious sleepwalkers moving their way through a pandemic-throttled America. If you’re looking for a good time, look no further, because America’s hottest bookclub is Wanderers — it’s got everything: artificial intelligence, bat fungus, washed-up rock stars, white supremacist militias, shady corporations, an election year, social media, a beloved theme park. Hashtag Stefon voice.

It’s obviously, um, weird having a book out like this right now because… you know, it’s surprisingly on-point. Now, to be fair, sci-fi and horror authors aren’t out there to really predict anything — if we’re talking about the future in our books, we’re really using that as a way to talk about our present. I just, um, didn’t anticipate this to be so presently present. At the same time, a lot of what’s in here aren’t things we couldn’t have seen coming. Hell, we did see this coming. Pandemic-level diseases are not new. They pop up every 10 years or so. It’s just, usually, they don’t get a foothold, and often they don’t get that foothold because we are somewhat ready for them. This one, we were not and here I could devolve into talking about the failure of a “””president””” who encourages people to make bleach smoothies and stick lightbulbs up their asses, buuuuut we already know all this.

There were a few bits of the book I wasn’t ready to have mirrored in reality (predictive AIs like BlueDot, or the comet called Swan), and there were quite a few bits I totally missed. If I were writing the book now I’m sure I would’ve written a chapter on toilet paper hoarding.

Hey, look at this — the back of the book has this little bit right here:

That’s pretty rad. It hit a lot of best-of-year-lists. Was nominated for the Stoker. Hit a lot of national bestseller lists. It’s gotten quotes from some people who… well, the list blows my mind (and culminates in five [!] pages of blurbs and comments at the fore of the paperback edition). I’ve honestly been very fortunate that people have responded as well as they have to this little (er, big) book. Am I humble bragging? No, I’m actual bragging, because I think authors should be proud of their books, and this one, I’m genuinely proud of.

Let’s get some of your procurement options out of the way, and again, given the era in which we live, it is worth considering buying from a local indie store, if you find yourself able to — independent bookstores are trying to stay alive (as are we all) in this peculiar epoch of pandemic bullshit, so helping them helps the industry which helps the authors and which creates a strong bookish ecosystem, and bookish ecosystems help books thrive so readers have them:

Paperback: Indiebound | Bookshop.org | Doylestown Books | Let’s Play Books

Or you can check out the book’s page at the publisher for more buy links.

Here’s the review aggregator from Lit Hub (ooh, look at those raves).

Also, I’ve updated my FAQ from when the book launched in July…

Is there a content warning?

There is. I’ve concealed it behind a ROT13 filter so that those who desire the warning can simply unscramble it by c/p’ing the encrypted text into the window at rot13.com.

Pbagrag jneavat: fhvpvqny vqrngvba, fhvpvqr, gbegher, enpvfz naq ovtbgel, qvfphffvbaf bs zragny urnygu naq zragny vyyarff, tha ivbyrapr, naq n tencuvpny qrfpevcgvba bs Z/Z encr (sbhaq ba cc 434-435 bs gur uneqonpx, ng gur raq bs puncgre 50).

Who will like this book?

YOU WILL, OF COURSE. You, specifically you. *stares unswervingly*

More seriously, this book is for fans of things like The Stand, Station Eleven, Lost, Swan Song, The Passage, The Book of M, The Strain, The Hot Zone. 

Wait why would I buy this pandemic book during a pandemic?

Well, that’s kind of on you, I guess — I don’t really know. Some readers will seek pure escapism during this time and others will go the opposite way. (I read McCammon’s Swan Song during the height of nuclear panic in the 80s and… well, it helped. YMMV.) I do think this helps contextualize a lot of what’s going on, and further, because what goes on in the book is so much more cuckoo bananapants, maybe our current reality will feel a little better. Plus, the book is, despite its grim matter, full of what I wanted to be heart and hope and humor. As Kirkus put it, “A story about survival that’s not just about you and me, but all of us, together… equal to Stephen King’s The Stand.” SyFy said it “makes the Apocalypse beautiful.” Kinda depends on your gut, but I like to think it’s still a worthy book to read right now.

Is this part of a series?

It not part of a series and is currently a standalone. (Though it’s big enough for 3-4 novels, I guess.) I’ve always said that there could be a sequel if the sales warranted it and if I had a story in mind and… *coughs into hand* I CAN SAY NO MORE.

What genre is it?

I don’t know. I mean, I guess technically it’s either “speculative fiction” or “science fiction,” but I also wrote what I feel is implicitly, if not explicitly, an epic horror novel. Certainly it seems to be working well for readers who like, say, Stephen King books. Hey, whatever. Thankfully, genres are just a thing people made up. So find whatever narrative taxonomy works for you!

What if I can’t afford the book?

Then I slyly but pointedly direct my gaze at Your Local Library. Libraries are where the free books — and essential community services! — live. If they do not carry the book, you can always contact them and ask them to, or perhaps request it through ILL (inter-library loan).

[Note, libraries are not all open right now, but many still lend e-books and audio!]

What can I do to support the book?

The story goes that what is most likely to convince someone to read a book is not me telling you to, or advertisements, or a blog tour, or a tweet, or, or, or — but rather, word-of-mouth. Meaning, the best thing you can do is talk about it. Online, in meatspace, wherever, however. Reviews on Amazon or Goodreads. Tweets, blog posts, incoherent wails of joy. Tell friends and family and random strangers and cherished villains. If you read it, and you like it, and you’re feeling particularly enthusiastic, that’s the best way to help — just try to get other people to read the ding-dang thing. That’s the hardest part, and I really can’t do it. This part falls to you. If, of course, you like it (and me) enough to do so.

Can I come see you and get the book signed?

So, once upon a time, the paperback was going to come out in July and I was going to go on a book tour. As a bit of inside publisher baseball, we looked at the sales numbers of the book and where the book overperformed were in places that, drum roll please, I went on book tour. Proving that book tours work — at least, for the right kind of author, and with the right kind of event. Were I a brand spanking new author with little “platform” (ugh) or “brand” (uggggh), maybe that wouldn’t work so well. But, I do okay in that department, and so I am fortunate enough that people come to my events to hear me talk. As such, Del Rey was intending to send me out again for this one — in this case, to states and cities I had missed the first go-round. Except, oops, that’s not happening now.

I will be doing some online gigs, of course, as we do now. I’ve got a great podcast interview about it coming up with Ana Marie Cox. Today I’ll be recording with Del Reydio, talking to my amazing editor, Tricia Narwani. I’ll also be doing an Instagram Live thing this Friday with Paul Krueger (2pm EST, at the Del Rey IG account), and may also have some other bits and bobs in the works.

As to whether or not you can get a signed book from me…

Welp, you can check with Doylestown Books, and it’s possible if you buy a copy from them, I can sign it? I think we can maybe facilitate a safe, socially-distant, mask-on way of doing that.

Are there Easter Eggs in the book?

There are, indeed. Lots of references to other books, other authors, my own books, and so forth. A hundred points to the Hogwarts House that finds them all.

What’s next for you?

Initially, Book of Accidents was coming out late Summer/early Fall, but we decided to move it based on the coming election, since media attention would be hyperfocused on that shitshow, and it seemed best to get out of the way of that screaming cultural locomotive lest we become blood paste on the tracks. So that is now coming out in Summer 2021. It’s done — though I should have a copy-edit pass to go, and a cover yet to reveal.

There’s also You Can Do Anything, Magic Skeleton, coming out in 2021 — my inane “motivational” tweets with art by the awesome Natalie Metzger.

And there’s Dust & Grim, my MG, coming out in 2021.

Gonna be a busy year.

That’s not even accounting for SECRET BOOKS 1, 2, AND 3.

So, please tell folks. Spread the word.

And don’t forget —

Black Swan says “hi.”

Disjecta Membra: 8

First and foremost, let’s talk free ice cream. I said I was giving away some free Jeni’s ice cream contingent on a donation to the RERF (Restaurant Employee Relief Fund), and we had 26 people donate, each for $25 or more, meaning a $650+ contribution to the RERF. Thank you all! Winner of the free ice cream was Kim Nelson! YAY KIM.

Also, let’s get the self-promo out of the way early. Reminder: the Wanderers paperback is out tomorrow! I might pop up some places here and there to promote it. Like, in your bathroom mirror.

Where the fuck is Flick? Where the Flick is Fuck? What? Huh? Shut up. Yes, I’m still playing Animal Crossing and I have an island full of cool rare bugs and I haven’t seen that motherfucker Flick in like, three weeks. Is this important? No. Am I mad about it regardless? Yes.

I might have fresh strawberries this afternoon. I know, you’ve got a soul boner for this hard-hitting content I’m laying down. But hey, fresh strawberries are a true joy of spring, and seems like we might be getting some today. And I didn’t know if we’d see much by way of fresh berries this year. Though we did plant some blueberry bushes, even though blueberries are, by and large, a disappointing bullshit fruit that consists largely of fruit that tastes more like the ghost of blueberries than actual blueberries. And yes, someone will say, BUT THAT’S JUST THE SUPERMARKET VERSION, except I’ve also had some farm market local blueberries too and they were also just little Baron Harkonnens full of berry-scented water. I’ve had maybe two pints of blueberries that tasted like blueberries, were delicious, and required naught but popping them in your maw. The rest were merely purple sadness balloons.

So, wait, why plant blueberries, then? For the birds, duh.

Speaking of birds! Seen some new ones recently including — whoa, what, a cuckoo? A literal goddamn cuckoo? Yep. Cuckoo. Photo at the bottom of the page, plus some other finds.

We are told that everything will now change. The pandemic, the lockdown, it’s changed us, changed society, changed what we do going forward. And I’m sure it has, to some degree, but I suspect those degrees are small — weird chaotic cascades. We’re expecting a BIG SOCIETAL SHIFT, but… then you see people lining up for bars, and wanting to hop on the next cruise ship, and refusing to wear masks because MAH FREEDOMS or some horseshit. Maybe nothing will change. Maybe this is, as others have noted, more like the gun debate, where we simply accept a tithing of blood and flesh to some disturbed, distorted idea of personal liberty. Personal liberty and American exceptionalism, each throttling the health of the community, and by proxy, the health of the individuals in that community. Because, though cliched, it really does take a village. And when we value the individual over the village that raised them — well, that’s how shit gets fucked up.

I keep hearing about a vaccine in the fall, but how? I’d think that’s too fast, isn’t it? Not that I don’t want one. I do. But a rushed vaccine that either doesn’t work well or that has deleterious side-effects will only widen the reality gap between science and anti-vax propaganda. It’d arguably give them ammo to push for that anti-science agenda. I mean, again, I want the vaccine soon — but given that a 12 month turnaround time would already have been abnormally fast, what’s it mean if that timeline is halved again to six months? What gets lost?

Here’s a thing that happens. Whenever any new Star Wars property comes out, I get tagged in a lot of articles about Aftermath, often due to speculation or because I decided some portion of the post-OT canon. Which is fine! It’s nice, even. But then I get a series of people who assure me that they have the inside scoop that XYZ thing from the New Star Wars property is actually a thing from Aftermath. This is also fine! I don’t think it’s problematic or anything, I just mean to say, it’s never been true. Some little Aftermathy bits have crept in — the valachord reference in Solo, or the general sort of vibe of Palpatine’s end game in ROTS. Needless to say, I’m again hearing things about how XYZ in Mandalorian Season 2 is from my books and — all I’ll say is, I will caution you to not believe it. Generally things in SW don’t jump from print to screen; they go the opposite, from screen to print. Screen leads the way. It’s a giant connected canonical universe, yes, except all revolves around a single star, and that star is the film and TV properties. This is not a rendered judgment against it. It’s just… how it tends to work.

Rise of Skywalker hasn’t stuck with me. I really liked it when I saw it in the theater, but haven’t yet been able to sit through it all the way now that I have the home version. I tried. But it’s just kinda soggy to me at present. It feels really pacey, like someone impatient is behind it, snapping fingers and asking it to hurry the fuck up and just get it over with. It doesn’t take any time to breathe. I should try skipping to the second half, see if that helps. I recall the second half feeling more paced out, more drawn, more consequential. Hrm. But my kid hasn’t really cared much about it either, which surprised me. For him it’s mostly about The Mandalorian. (As a sidenote, this is about me and not about you, and whether you hate the movie or love it, it says nothing about you, nor your tastes, nor mine. We really need to get over the idea that our pop culture preferences — or even our general preferences at all — are in any way an assault on anyone else’s own feelings.)

We’re doing No-Mow May. Which is, like, the most wonderfully lazy way to support the environment. We just don’t mow. The front yard is getting leggy as hell, but seeing a lot of wildflowers pop up, and a lot of native pollinators. Already got bumbles bumbling, but also mining bees. And we have what I think is a huge sycamore maple which has these dangling scrotal blossoms on it, and they are COVERED in bees. And now we’re all imagining scrotums slathered in bees and I’m sorry, but also, I’m not that sorry.

Also planted some native plants. What did we get, let’s see — helianthus, phlox, blueberry, asters, bee balm, mountain mint, hazlenut, hyssop. Will get more as we can. Also have some actual veggies growing now: radishes, kale, snap peas, carrots. Put in some temporary beds too and will plant some more post-frost seeds.

Sorry, back to Star Wars. Damn, though, the Clone Wars final season was… aaaaghghrbrbble, so good. I honestly have a sort of sour gut feeling whenever I think of Star Wars these days (too much time in those trenches, I guess), but this was a hump I didn’t have a hard time getting over. Honestly, feel how you feel about the prequels — but TCW series and even Rebels truly contextualize the prequels in a meaningful way. One thing that’s interesting to me is that the character of Anakin in the films and the character of Anakin in TCW are… pretty different. TCW is a more confident, subtle version of Anakin, one whose fall feels more natural — and one who, I think, you like more. It’s interesting to see that divergence, and ponder if it’s just a stylistic authorial choice or a willful kind of course correction.

That’s it, I think. Photos, and see you tomorrow.