Last week’s challenge, I asked you to come up with an opening line for a story.
This week, you’re going to write a story based on one of those opening lines.
(Er, not your own, thanks.)
Look through them:
Choose one.
(Choose one that complies with the original mandate of keeping to 15 words or less.)
A lot of great options in there. (Though, to be fair, a surprising lot of not so great options in this batch. Lots of errors and over-the-limits. People: read your entries before you click SUBMIT. It’ll take you like, 30 extra seconds, I promise.)
Please identify in the comments below which opening line you’ll choose.
I’ll tally and, presuming there’s a winner, I’ll send that person The Kick-Ass Writer.
Then: you write 1000 words using your chosen line. Post at your online space and link back here.
I’ll choose one of the participants (by random) and toss you a copy of — well, I dunno what. I’ll grab something off my shelves and mail it to you. (Or, if you’re international, I’ll give you something digital.)
Due by noon EST on November 22nd.
Get your fingers tapping.
Francesca Carrillo says:
I chose Jan O’ Connell’s: “Appropriately enough, it was a shopping trolley that killed her.”
Death by Trolley
November 19, 2013 — 1:30 AM
C.M. Simpson says:
For a long while I was stuck on what to write in response to David Novack’s entry: “Well,” Jimmy muttered, “it was clearly a mistake picking this room to piss in.” but the words eventually cooperated and along came “The Dinabranki in Defeat”.
http://cmsimpson.blogspot.com.au/2013/11/flash-fiction-challenge-response.html
Enjoy 🙂
November 19, 2013 — 5:40 AM
JL Henry says:
Oh i liked that very much 🙂
November 20, 2013 — 11:05 PM
Gina Hay says:
http://gekkegina.simplesite.com/298906585 , officially handed in before the deadline. Victory is mine.
November 19, 2013 — 8:02 AM
Ilona the Rose says:
I like this story – it’s truly intriguing, and unexpected. I was bewildered and satisfied all at once when it was through. But you need to edit! A solid block of text without any paragraph breaks is about as inviting to read as a clean brick wall (I know it sometimes formats like that when you copy-paste into a blog editor), and there’s some spelling/grammar mistakes in there too. There’s still a couple days before the week is out, plenty of time to tidy up.
Keep writing, and I’ll keep reading!
November 20, 2013 — 4:56 AM
Simon B. says:
I liked it. I actually think the wall-of-text approach works very well in this particular case – it reads as a disorganised stream of consciousness from someone not quite sure what to make of his experience.
November 20, 2013 — 5:19 PM
Ilona the Rose says:
I know what you mean Simon – as uninviting as it looks, I had no problem following the story, and despite no breaks, it isn’t rushed or confusing. The words do all the work and carry all the weight. I do like a good rule-breaking, when it works.
November 20, 2013 — 10:16 PM
Jeremy Podolski says:
My challenge offering begins with the line, “I won’t tell you how I died, and they can’t tell you why,” contributed by Allison Rose. Read RULES OF MORTALITY at http://jeremypodolski.com/2013/11/19/short-fiction-rules-of-mortality/
November 19, 2013 — 2:36 PM
murgatroid98 says:
This is really good. I’d love to read more of it.
November 20, 2013 — 6:41 PM
Jeremy Podolski says:
Thanks for reading! I’m definitely interested in doing more with this character.
November 20, 2013 — 7:19 PM
JL Henry says:
I enjoyed this. The egg imagery worked really well.
November 20, 2013 — 11:20 PM
Jeremy Podolski says:
I appreciate the note – thank you
November 20, 2013 — 11:30 PM
Smoph says:
I liked solving violence with logic. Good work!
November 23, 2013 — 1:02 AM
Allison Rose says:
I’m honored you chose my line! You’ve written an intriguing story; I’ve always been intrigued by death and the afterlife. I enjoyed reading your story.
November 25, 2013 — 10:40 AM
Jeremy Podolski says:
Thanks, Allison, for your comments here and on my blog. It is a spectacular line, and I loved the opportunity to work with it!
November 25, 2013 — 10:48 AM
Ken Crump says:
I’m using zanzjan’s
His first mistake was burying it in his own backyard.
November 19, 2013 — 10:34 PM
Ken Crump says:
Half a day late, but done and posted. Separation Anxiety
http://brickhousepiggy.wordpress.com/2013/11/22/separation-anxiety/
November 22, 2013 — 7:59 PM
Simon B. says:
I loved the tone, completely unexpected. I liked that there were a lot of unanswered questions.
November 25, 2013 — 6:55 PM
Byron Lagrone says:
I’m using Caitlin’s — “Everyone knows The 7 Deadly Sins. Y’think the others are the good guys? Think again.”
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1-bSDMAmmS0H_fRY_QqhH2syVxxV-cuLTA1eVCpZmbXw/edit?usp=sharing
November 20, 2013 — 2:35 AM
zer_netmouse says:
I’m using “Sam was puzzling over the hatch in the basement floor when he heard a knock.”, by boydstun215
November 20, 2013 — 9:15 AM
zer_netmouse says:
Here’s the story: http://netmouse.livejournal.com/774909.html
November 22, 2013 — 11:06 AM
Joe Donahue says:
Here’s my attempt. My opening line was “Every second Saturday Tom Pope had a beer with Devil.” It was contributed by Andrew Jack.
https://joebrewing.wordpress.com/2013/11/20/chess-with-devil/
November 20, 2013 — 1:55 PM
Adrienne says:
I chose Julia H’s “I flicked the lighter open and watched the flame dance in the wind.”
A bit short on the word count, but here it is:
http://thepaddedcastle.wordpress.com/2013/11/20/fiction-challenge-hunter-of-hunters/
November 20, 2013 — 4:15 PM
mckkenzie says:
Really good!
November 20, 2013 — 4:21 PM
Kyra Dune says:
Good story.
November 20, 2013 — 8:10 PM
Shiloh A. Ohmes says:
That was a wild ride, I want to read more!
November 22, 2013 — 12:43 PM
Adrienne says:
Wow! Thanks guys!
November 23, 2013 — 10:22 PM
C Calhoun says:
So I chose JD’s opening line: Nothing good ever happens after midnight.
Here’s the story
http://niftywords.weebly.com/1/post/2013/11/midnight-mission.html
November 20, 2013 — 4:59 PM
Simon B. says:
Second time poster here.
I chose Ashley M. K.’s “Lock. Unlock. Lock. Unlock. Lock. He always locked doors three times. Everything in threes.”
I clock in just shy of 1,500 words, potentially disqualifying myself, but I was having too much fun to finish before seeing where it led.
http://probablyfalse.tumblr.com/post/67594574799/three-skidoo
November 20, 2013 — 5:03 PM
Simon B. says:
I ended up doing another, shorter one, prompted by “At first it was just a tiny dot in the cool blue afternoon sky.”
http://probablyfalse.tumblr.com/post/67750253226/shell
It sort of wrote itself in the early hours of this morning and by accident. I thought I might as well put it up here. I’m hoping it’s not too… translucent.
November 22, 2013 — 8:53 AM
Ilona the Rose says:
Adrenaline rush! Loved it and would read more – this hints at a much larger story that needs to be told now you’ve tantalised us with this tidbit. What is ‘subbing’? What event set this in motion? I have to know.
November 24, 2013 — 3:49 AM
Simon B. says:
Thanks for reading, Ilona, and thank you for the kind words.
November 25, 2013 — 6:56 PM
Bill says:
I chose:
“It doesn’t mean death,” I told her.
From murgatroid98.
Here it is: http://wmontefiore.com/terribleminds-flash-fiction-challenge-find-your-favorite-opening-line/
Hope you enjoy!
November 21, 2013 — 3:14 AM
Jeremy Podolski says:
I liked your line about his “mind’s ear” a lot.
November 21, 2013 — 2:03 PM
Fatma Alici says:
I went with Murgatroid98’s “It doesn’t mean death,” I told her.
http://naharavensari.wordpress.com/2013/11/21/forgotten-bargain/
November 21, 2013 — 4:23 AM
Heather Milne Johnson says:
I liked your story. Now I’m wondering what happens to Max 🙂
November 23, 2013 — 8:42 AM
Fatma Alici says:
To be honest so am I.
November 23, 2013 — 1:31 PM
Ilona the Rose says:
“At first it was just a tiny dot in the cool blue afternoon sky” – ZTS
http://ilonatherose.wordpress.com/2013/11/21/the-dot-on-the-sky/
November 21, 2013 — 3:44 PM
Kyra Dune says:
Interesting.
November 21, 2013 — 4:06 PM
Simon B. says:
This is really quite thought-provoking. It’s a great concept and you haven’t wasted a single word. I think you captured that sense of childhood intensity really well.
I *loved* the idea of Harold making a ‘gallant effort’ with his tea. It reminded me of fighting similar dinnertime battles against insurmountably yucky green odds as a kid, hating it but knowing it’d please my mum.
November 21, 2013 — 7:43 PM
Rebecca Douglass says:
I like the story. I also like your art!
November 21, 2013 — 8:09 PM
Ilona the Rose says:
Cheers! I’ve been drawing a lot more than writing lately – people have begun telling me I should write a children’s book.
November 24, 2013 — 5:09 AM
Jeremy Podolski says:
This took me to an unexpected place, and I thought your dialogue was very realistic.
November 22, 2013 — 9:36 AM
Ilona the Rose says:
Thanks all for your feedback! Much appreciated.
November 24, 2013 — 3:30 AM
Shiloh A. Ohmes says:
I chose ‘Annoyed, she stabbed him and finished her dinner,’ by marybelr.
http://crazyinkslinger.wordpress.com/2013/11/21/short-fiction-the-last-job-fates-a-bitch/
November 21, 2013 — 3:56 PM
Shiloh A. Ohmes says:
I chose the opening line ‘Annoyed, she stabbed him and finished her dinner,’ by marybelr.
http://crazyinkslinger.wordpress.com/2013/11/21/short-fiction-the-last-job-fates-a-bitch/
November 21, 2013 — 4:48 PM
Tony Taylor says:
I really enjoyed the story and wanted more. I chose the same line form Marybelr, but went with a way different approach.
Along with the story, I also enjoyed your short, but concise descriptions that captured the events as they unfolded. Nicely done. I am including my version for your perusal. Thanks and happy writing.
http://taylormaderandomwrites.blogspot.com/2013/11/dinner-with-blind-hate-flash-fiction.html
November 21, 2013 — 11:21 PM
Shiloh A. Ohmes says:
Thanks for the read! I’m glad you enjoyed it. It ended up being an origin story for my current project, which worked out great.
Your version is awesome, I could see everything unfolding like a movie in my mind. The emotions were spot on, and I love the twist at the end. You built up to it nicely, it gave me the chills.
Happy writing!
November 22, 2013 — 6:47 AM
Tony Taylor says:
I, in turn, would like to also thank you for reading. I am just now rediscovering my lost love for writing and I am hoping to continue as writing is the one thing that gives balance to my world at this moment. I am so thankful for this web site and the chance to share and interact with people who are as passionate about words, story and character as I am. Continued and happy writing. Best of luck with your future work. I look forward to reading them.
November 22, 2013 — 6:53 AM
R.T. Wilder says:
I chose Andrew Jack’s “Every second Saturday, Tom Pope had a beer with the Devil.” http://rtwilder.wordpress.com/2013/11/21/for-flash-fiction-challenge-find-your-favourite-opening-line-titled-care-bear-scare/
November 21, 2013 — 6:46 PM
benjaminryant says:
I used Mike Paul’s line: “Someone once told me bourbon was great for removing blood stains.”
http://brtwrites.com/2013/11/21/flash-fiction-thursday-the-kitchen-pantry/
November 21, 2013 — 11:16 PM
Rebecca B. says:
I am eager to present my first flash fiction!
I selected the line “All she had to do was wait” by Nora.
http://girlbooksblog.wordpress.com/2013/11/22/the-last-noel/
Yay I actually finished something!!!
November 22, 2013 — 12:22 AM
JL Henry says:
I loved it. The build of tension to the final line was perfect.
November 22, 2013 — 1:50 AM
momdude says:
I’ve used the first line offered up by Kenneth Jobe (November 9th, 12:32 AM in last week’s comments) to produce “Zero To Hero”. As always, comments and constructive criticisms are appreciated.
http://pauljwillett.com/2013/11/21/flash-fiction-xxx/
November 22, 2013 — 12:28 AM
M.R. Dorough says:
I chose ZTS’s “At first it was just a tiny dot in the cool blue afternoon sky.”
http://mrdorough.wordpress.com/2013/11/22/the-shadow-in-the-valley/
November 22, 2013 — 1:48 AM
Lani Gerbi says:
Greetings! It’s been a while but I come to you now bearing (nearly) 1000 words of silliness. Hope you like it. 😀
http://lanigerbi.blogspot.com.au/2013/11/fiction-greg-and-dragon.html
November 22, 2013 — 6:37 AM
Lani Gerbi says:
Sorry forgot to mention. My opening line is tbianconi’s:
“You amuse me, human,” the Dragon said, swallowing several thousand Smarties in on gulp.
November 22, 2013 — 7:32 AM
Heather Milne Johnson says:
I used mikepaul’s line: Someone once told me bourbon was great for removing blood stains. This was a lot of fun, I look forward to completing more challenges.
http://wp.me/p3McUV-1S
November 22, 2013 — 6:44 AM
Nikki Snow says:
I loved your story! I used the same line but went in a different direction. I really liked the twist at the end. Nice job!
November 22, 2013 — 7:30 AM
Nikki Snow says:
This is the first time I’ve done a flash fiction. Wicked fun! Thanks for the prompt Mr. Mike Paul (“Someone once told me bourbon was great for removing blood stains”)! I haven’t written in quite a long time.
http://nikki.io/archives/entry/20/
November 22, 2013 — 7:21 AM
Heather Milne Johnson says:
“their fists curled into angry wrecking balls” I loved that line and really enjoyed the whole story. Your character is such a bad ass.
November 23, 2013 — 8:26 AM
Julia H. says:
I used Nora’s: “All she had to do was wait.”
November 22, 2013 — 9:36 AM
Julia H. says:
Here it is, I call it “The Switch.” It’s my first flash fiction and I’m sort of new to this whole writing business. Tell me what you think, I’m open to criticism. http://juliaunheardof.blogspot.com/
November 22, 2013 — 11:32 AM
Nikki Snow says:
Hi Julia – I really liked your piece. I want to know more of the backstory! Perhaps you’ll flesh it out into a longer story? Please let me know if you do.
November 22, 2013 — 12:47 PM
Julia H. says:
Thanks! I hadn’t really thought much into the backstory besides what’s in the piece so far. Maybe I will expand it sometime in the future.
November 22, 2013 — 2:08 PM
Mildred says:
“Kill me with Kindness” 🙂 http://www.scribd.com/doc/186339528/Kill-Me-With-Kindness
November 22, 2013 — 12:29 PM
Mildred says:
Apologies for being half an hour late. I miscalculated EST.
November 22, 2013 — 12:33 PM
flyawaybluebird says:
Thanks for picking my intro, Mildred! I enjoyed the read. Who knew kindness had such a dark side?
November 23, 2013 — 8:36 PM
Jemima Pett says:
I’m doing some more of these in the lead up to Christmas. Today’s is here: http://jemimapett.com/2013/11/29/friday-flash-fiction-the-scottish-connection/
November 29, 2013 — 5:54 AM