{"id":22426,"date":"2014-02-18T06:58:14","date_gmt":"2014-02-18T11:58:14","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/terribleminds.com\/ramble\/?p=22426"},"modified":"2014-02-18T09:49:57","modified_gmt":"2014-02-18T14:49:57","slug":"baboon-fart-story-is-now-an-actual-thing","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/terribleminds.com\/ramble\/2014\/02\/18\/baboon-fart-story-is-now-an-actual-thing\/","title":{"rendered":"&#8220;Baboon Fart Story&#8221; Is Now An Actual Thing"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>The other day, in my &#8220;<a title=\"http:\/\/terribleminds.com\/ramble\/2014\/02\/16\/self-publishing-truism-bingo\/\" href=\"http:\/\/terribleminds.com\/ramble\/2014\/02\/16\/self-publishing-truism-bingo\/\"><span style=\"text-decoration: underline;\"><strong>self-publishing truism bingo<\/strong><\/span><\/a>&#8221; post, I said:<\/p>\n<blockquote><p>&#8216;I can literally write the word \u201cfart\u201d 100,000 times and slap [on] a cover of baboon urinating into his own mouth, then upload that cool motherfucker right to Amazon. Nobody would stop me. Whereas, at the Kept Gates, a dozen editors and agents would slap my Baboon Fart Story to the ground like an errant badminton birdie.&#8217;<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p>That book,\u00a0<strong>Baboon Fart Story<\/strong>, now exists on Amazon.<\/p>\n<p>Cover and text descriptors remain accurate.<\/p>\n<p><a title=\"Baboon Fart Story: An Experiment\" href=\"http:\/\/www.amazon.com\/Baboon-Fart-Story-experiment-inspired-ebook\/dp\/B00II8I98G\/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&amp;qid=1392724455&amp;sr=8-1&amp;keywords=baboon+fart+story\"><span style=\"text-decoration: underline;\"><strong>Link here<\/strong><\/span><\/a>.<\/p>\n<p>I am not the person who posted it, nor did I know it was a thing. It was created by a psychologist who goes by the name &#8220;Phronk,&#8221; which I think is also the sound our taco terrier makes when she&#8217;s snoring. It now has 24 reviews. Which is more than some of my books have.<\/p>\n<p>I am sorry and you are also welcome.<\/p>\n<p>[EDIT: 9:48AM, EST]<\/p>\n<p>It would seem as if the sweet ride that was <strong>BABOON FART STORY\u00a0<\/strong>is over, 24 hours after it began. The link is dead. The dream has died. (More seriously: I don&#8217;t know if THAT SURLY GATEKEEPER KNOWN AS &#8220;AMAZON&#8221; removed it or if the author did or what, but for now,\u00a0<em>&#8217;tis gone<\/em>.<\/p>\n<p>*viking funeral for baboons and farts*<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>The other day, in my &#8220;self-publishing truism bingo&#8221; post, I said: &#8216;I can literally write the word \u201cfart\u201d 100,000 times and slap [on] a cover of baboon urinating into his own mouth, then upload that cool motherfucker right to Amazon. Nobody would stop me. Whereas, at the Kept Gates, a dozen editors and agents would [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":{"0":"post-22426","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","5":"hentry","6":"category-theramble","8":"no-featured-image"},"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/pv7MR-5PI","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/terribleminds.com\/ramble\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/22426","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/terribleminds.com\/ramble\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/terribleminds.com\/ramble\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/terribleminds.com\/ramble\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/terribleminds.com\/ramble\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=22426"}],"version-history":[{"count":6,"href":"https:\/\/terribleminds.com\/ramble\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/22426\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":22432,"href":"https:\/\/terribleminds.com\/ramble\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/22426\/revisions\/22432"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/terribleminds.com\/ramble\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=22426"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/terribleminds.com\/ramble\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=22426"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/terribleminds.com\/ramble\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=22426"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}