{"id":11318,"date":"2011-10-20T09:00:55","date_gmt":"2011-10-20T13:00:55","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/terribleminds.com\/ramble\/?p=11318"},"modified":"2011-10-20T10:42:46","modified_gmt":"2011-10-20T14:42:46","slug":"penmonkey-status-report","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/terribleminds.com\/ramble\/2011\/10\/20\/penmonkey-status-report\/","title":{"rendered":"Penmonkey Status Report"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

Okay, first thing out of the gate is —<\/p>\n

HOLY CRAP BLACKBIRDS <\/strong>COVER.<\/p>\n

If I could bedazzle that, make it pulse, blink, throw in a bunch of interrobangs, have the letters get up and work-it work-it on the stripper pole, Sweet Molly McGoggins, I would<\/em>. Because it’s a helluva cover.<\/p>\n

I’m a lucky dude with a cover like that.<\/p>\n

Miriam Black, realized.<\/p>\n

Oh so many tiny images contained within that one. Beautiful. Beautiful!<\/p>\n

And a cover like that is thanks to the Mighty Artification Powers of Joey Hi-Fi<\/strong><\/span><\/a>, who also did the award-winning cover<\/strong><\/span><\/a> to Lauren Beukes’ ZOO CITY<\/strong> (a book if you haven’t read, you need to correct ASAMFP).<\/p>\n

Bow down to him.<\/p>\n

Thanks to the mighty bibliomantium overlords at Angry Robot for making such a killer cover happen.<\/p>\n

Writing Advice Snidbit<\/h3>\n

Right quick, I posted this on the Twittertubes and the Google-Doubleplusgoods yesterday, and so I thought I’d just pop it up here as a tiny li’l snidbit of dubious writing wisdom:<\/p>\n

When writing a 1st draft, duck your head low and bolt for the finish line. Don’t stop. Don’t blink. Follow the map far as it takes you.<\/em><\/p>\n

Know that the book will be born during rewrites. When you break its carapace and find the true beast beneath the old ruined skin. <\/em><\/p>\n

It’s okay when your map, the plan, the outline, fails you. That’s good. Sometimes roads are closed for a reason. Don’t freeze. Keep writing.<\/em><\/p>\n

Remember: slow and steady wins the race when rocking that first draft. Even 1k a day gets you your draft in under three months. <\/em><\/p>\n

Also, something-something-porn-whiskey-dopamine-killyourdarlings-cthulhu-fthnagn-poop-noise. Now shut up and write.<\/em><\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Do with that as thou wilt. Share! Discuss! Debate! Dispute!<\/p>\n

Allonsy<\/em>, Alonzo!<\/p>\n

Why I Write<\/h3>\n

LA Gilman<\/a><\/strong><\/span> pointed out that today is, apparently, the National Day Of Writing, and so you can head over to Twitter and use the hashtag #whyiwrite to, well, describe why you write.<\/p>\n

For me, it’s simple:<\/p>\n

Writing is how I tell stories, and telling stories is how I communicate myself to the world. I am my stories and my stories are me and just as civilizations used mythology to explain themselves and their world, I use storytelling and writing to explain myself<\/em> and my world<\/em>, and transmit that idea via the penmonkey frequency to all who care to intercept it. That is, of course, the philosophical side.<\/p>\n

The practical side is, Mommy gets a what-what and needs money, and writing is how I get that money. Sorry to crass it up with commerce, but trust me, writing is a pretty fangasmic way of earning a living.<\/p>\n

Hop over to Twitter or tell us in the comments:<\/p>\n

Why do you<\/em> write?<\/p>\n

Penmonkey Incitement Level Up Ding!<\/h3>\n

Holy crap, the Penmonkey Incitement is up to 442\/1000 copies of COAFPM<\/strong><\/span><\/a> sold.<\/p>\n

Which means we crossed the 400 mark.<\/p>\n

Which means I need to give away:<\/p>\n

Another postcard.<\/p>\n

Another t-shirt.<\/p>\n

Another penmonkey critique of someone’s writing.<\/p>\n

It also<\/em> means that after another 58 sales, I’m going to give away a Kindle<\/em>.<\/p>\n

I’m going to wait until tomorrow morning, at this time (9AM EST) to pick the winners, thus giving you folks a chance to get your names into the hat if you haven’t already. Diggit?<\/p>\n

So, to those who have procured the book via PDF: you don’t need to do anything.<\/p>\n

Those who have procured it via Amazon or B&N, well, you need to make sure I know about it. Send me proof of purchase to terribleminds at gmail dot com<\/strong>.<\/p>\n

Also be advised that buying CONFESSIONS<\/strong><\/span><\/a> or<\/em> REVENGE OF THE PENMONKEY<\/strong><\/span><\/a> during the month of October also<\/em> earns you a free copy of 250 THINGS YOU SHOULD KNOW ABOUT WRITING<\/a><\/strong><\/span>. Again, though, if you bought via Amazon or B&N, you need to contact me at the above email address to make sure I know you bought it. I ain’t psychic.<\/p>\n

Ch-Chak, Boom! Shotgun Gravy Has Arrived<\/h3>\n

I’m sure you noticed this, but SHOTGUN GRAVY<\/strong><\/span><\/a> arrived on Amazon, B&N, and here at terribleminds<\/strong>.<\/p>\n

As of this moment, I’ve crossed the 100 sales mark, which is where I hoped to be. The first day was a little tepid but I think that’s because it was a Friday (and a Friday in which a new iPhone dropped — hell, half the day I was trying to get mine activated, so I get it). I’ve gotten emails and tweets from people who seem to not just like it, but really love it, which is overwhelmingly awesome. The story means a lot to me and I hope people take a chance on it.<\/p>\n

If it sells steadily, I’d say BAIT DOG<\/strong> is a good bet for December-ish.<\/p>\n

If sales hit the wall — well, who knows?<\/p>\n

If you find my promos of SHOTGUN GRAVY<\/strong> ever get too loud (they will die back soon enough, I assure you), please poke me in the ribs and politely ask that I cool it down. It’s hard being a self-published author in particular because you’re forced to be a one-man-marketing-machine, and the line between “Helpful Advertising!” and “Annoying Spamfuck!” gets real blurry, real quick-like.<\/p>\n

Obviously if you liked the book, please do leave a review and share with your friends how much you dug it.<\/p>\n

Inner Views And Udder Links<\/h3>\n

Hey, look, ma, you can hear my voice at various places!<\/p>\n

First up: The Mighty Maven Of Word-Making, Mur “The Murder” Lafferty interviews me over at her podcast, ISBW (I Should Be Writing). Check it out riiiiight here<\/strong><\/span><\/a>.<\/p>\n

Second up: Sexy svelte storyteller extraordinaire J.C. “The Rabbit Hutch” Hutchins has me visit at his site where we dig into some transmedia chatter. Check that out at this underlined linky-thing<\/strong><\/span><\/a>.<\/p>\n

If you have not read the first chapter of DOUBLE DEAD<\/strong>, then you will note that Flames Rising has posted that very thing<\/strong><\/span><\/a>. Want to preorder? Go right ahead<\/strong><\/span><\/a>. Coburn is coming.<\/em><\/p>\n

I’ve got a story in THE NEW HERO <\/strong>(Vol I), featuring a thug enforcer for the quite-literal Underworld, Mookie “The Meatman” Pearl. Robin Laws edited, and Gene Ha did the cover:<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

…and if you look at the bottom row and see a big dude with a meat cleaver, that’s Mookie. It’s a story I’m really proud of and was a fuuuhuuuhuuuuuckin’ hoot to write. Hopefully the same to read.<\/p>\n

I know, right? Two awesome covers in one day.<\/p>\n

My khakis, they are shellacked.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Anyway, here’s a general “What The Shizznut is Wendig Up To?” post. Absorb it into your brain-stream or ignore it at your leisure. Contained within: dubious advice! Book covers! Interviews! Promotions! Incitements! Poop noise! Shall we continue? Let’s! As the Doctor would say: Allonsy!<\/p>\n

(Alonzo.)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[11,16],"class_list":{"0":"post-11318","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","5":"hentry","6":"category-theramble","7":"tag-chuckwendig","8":"tag-news","10":"no-featured-image"},"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/pv7MR-2Wy","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/terribleminds.com\/ramble\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11318","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/terribleminds.com\/ramble\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/terribleminds.com\/ramble\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/terribleminds.com\/ramble\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/terribleminds.com\/ramble\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=11318"}],"version-history":[{"count":12,"href":"https:\/\/terribleminds.com\/ramble\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11318\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":11327,"href":"https:\/\/terribleminds.com\/ramble\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11318\/revisions\/11327"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/terribleminds.com\/ramble\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=11318"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/terribleminds.com\/ramble\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=11318"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/terribleminds.com\/ramble\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=11318"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}