Posts Tagged ‘travel’
A Blue Hawaiian tastes and looks like Windex. Poi looks like library paste, or the sputum of a grandfatherly goblin, but it tastes a little like sour clay — which sounds horrible, until you pair it with kalua pork or pipikaula. Poke looks like cubes of raw tuna, but it tastes like heaven’s nectar. A [...]
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I totally don’t have a cold. I totally don’t have a cold. I totally — oh, goddamnit, really? Do I have a cold? Again? In Hawaii? This totally happened last time, you know. Got a cold about halfway through the trip. I’m going to just go ahead and pretend it’s not true. LA LA LA [...]
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I don’t mean to denigrate anybody’s culture. I really don’t. I’m just saying — the Hawaiian language, with its reliance on a sparse few consonants and the whole caboodle of nouns, well, c’mon. I have the brain of a 12-year-old boy (in a jar under my desk). Hoonani. Hoowili. Poipu. Pe’e. I’m just saying, it’s [...]
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Okay. I’m not saying I’m drunk. I mean, it’s not like I pissed myself or anything (ahem, yet). I’m really not that bad. It’s just — hey, my lips are numb. And my teeth feel alive. I just drank a Mai Tai out of a giant tiki head. And then I consumed some kind of [...]
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At my back is the sound of waves crashing. We are in Hawaii. We almost were not in Hawaii today. Yesterday, we wake up to make a mid-morning flight. Shuttle service was supposed to pick us up at 7:00AM, but since they dropped us off at the wrong address the first time through, I figured, [...]
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