The Weekly Wire: “The King Stay The King”

In case you missed it, I’m suddenly hip-deep in The Wire, and hot damn, I’m hungry for more. So, here’s the deal. I figure if hoity-toity snooty-ass Harvard can have a college course about The Wire, we can do a little something like that here at terribleminds. From time to time, I’ll post a little snippet of dialogue from the show (yes, I know, the post title says “weekly,” shaddup shuttin’ up, rabbit). Why? Because you want to learn how to write, you have to learn how to pay attention... Read The Rest →

My Life As Liz

That’s a really weird blog post title, isn’t it?  No, this is not the blog post where I finally transition into becoming a woman. (Fun Fact: had I been born a girl, I would’ve been named “Charlene.”) Rather, this is a post where I exhort you to watch… MTV. I know. I know. Just push past it. For now, just nod and smile for me, okay? I don’t need the twisted frowns, the raised eyebrows, the “jerk-off” motions performed by mocking hands. Stop sniggering. Stop it right now. I’m not... Read The Rest →

Please To Meet Death, The Thief Of Conflict

Awooga, awooga. Warning. Sirens. Red lights flashing. A naked old man gesticulating wildly. I’m going to spoil various fictional properties. I do not like spoilers, and I am not spoiling them because I drink in your misery. That said, in making my point it will be necessary to pull back the curtain on some particular pop culture properties — otherwise, I have to say something like, “And that ahem, main character dies in that one television show on ABC that we’ve all seen, wink, wink, thumbs-up,” and you’ll blink and... Read The Rest →

Anatomy of a Saturday Night Live Sketch

Step One: Introduce the Apparently Funny Concept. These may include: people with kooky catchphrases, people who wear wacky outfits, or hilarious stereotypes! Mix all three for a potent Hilarity Cocktail! Yummers! Step Two: Reiterate, but do not escalate, the joke. The arc of a good comedy sketch should be a single flat line going from Point A to Point B! Examples might include: saying the same catchphrase multiple times throughout the sketch, or, continuing to be stereotypey in the same way! Remember — if something is funny once, it’s funny... Read The Rest →

FlashForward: The Slapdash Sort-Of-Review

This new show on ABC says, “Hey, just what the fuck would happen if everybody passed out for two minutes and seventeen seconds, and in that blackout saw a glimpse of themselves six months into the future?” I thought, shit, that sounds interesting. I’d read some good early reviews. I know it’s based (loosely?) on a novel by Robert Sawyer. I decided to watch. The verdict? Ehh? Mmm? Okay? Guh? And other non-committal noises? (My review — if you can call it that, as it will be loose and unmoored... Read The Rest →

Doctor Greg House: Incurably Himself?

If you can read it, check out that tagline in the upper-right corner of the House M.D. “Snakes on a Cane” poster. It reads, “Incurably himself.” Do you watch House? I got hooked into it about a year ago, and the wife and I absorbed the entire run in a very short time thanks to the one-two punch of Netflix and the USA Network. Last night was the show’s sixth season premiere (“Broken”), and it was a goddamn great episode. (Beware some light spoilers.) House, trapped in an asylum for... Read The Rest →

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