Here’s How To Finish Your Revision, You Filthy Animal

CONGRATULATIONS, YOU HAVE SHAT OUT A BOOK. You clenched up your middle and wrinkled your brow — then, from one of your creative holes poured this narrative slurry of words and ideas, this malformed gremlin egg of unhatched potential. On every page, characters flop and flail, they say stuff, they do stuff, and it all hangs together with rubbery tendon and braids of discolored flesh. You wrote a book. Nice job. Yes, high-five and fist-bump and go get a cupcake. *swats cupcake out of your hand* I DIDN’T SAY EAT THE... Read The Rest →

Macro Monday Gets A Little Frosty

That’s not a recent macro, but I figured given the white stuff that dumped upon a lot of you in the past few days (though we only got a couple inches at most), this macro was appropriate. Not much else going on, really, of note. Blackbirds, the first Miriam Black book, remains $1.99 for your e-machine: at B&N, Amazon, Apple, Kobo and Google Play. So, if you were looking for a cheap and easy way to dive into Miriam Black’s blood-soaked, nicotine-charred world of asphalt and motels and murder, well, there’s no price like the present one. It... Read The Rest →

Flash Fiction Challenge: Apocalypse Now!

AND WE’RE BACK. It’s time to revivify these challenges, I think, and this time around, let’s lean hard into our current geopolitical poopshow and ponder THE APOCALYPSE. Except, here’s the deal. I don’t want you to write THE USUAL APOCALYPSE. I want you to make one up you have not seen before. A rare, strange, unparalleled apocalypse. Unexpected. Unwritten. You have, ohhh, let’s say 1500 words to give us a glimpse of your brand new uniquely-you Apocalypse. Due on (dun dun dun) Friday the 13th, by noon EST. Post at... Read The Rest →

I Gotcher Blackbirds! Blackbirds Here! Just A Buck-Ninety-Nine

DEAREST AUDIENCE, I write to inform you of a recent change regarding my debut original novel, Blackbirds, which features the first adventure of the heroine, Miriam Black, a scalding cup of rat poison in human form. Miriam is a psychic and is able to see how and when you die simply by touching your skin to her skin. This has, quite clearly, left poor Miriam feeling less and less pleasant as regards humanity and the rest of its sweaty ilk. That novel is presently on sale for a mere one dollar and ninety-nine pennies, and it is... Read The Rest →

Awkward Author Photo Contest: The Awkward Author Winners!

AND SO IT IS DONE. The votes are tallied. The awkwardness is codified and canonical. Here then are the top four winners – #14 (by a long shot), #22, then in a tight race, #27, and #15. #2 also came in close enough where I’m gonna just go ahead and count it as five winners as much as four, because those last three were one vote off apiece, and god only knows if I fucked up the vote count. Congrats to you winners. I mean, “congrats,” because c’mon. *side-eye* YOU... Read The Rest →

Writer Resolution, 2017: Write Despite

Every year I try to offer up some kind of writerly resolution, some goal, some quest, some authorial charge to lead you into and through the New Year. It’s half-bullshit, as everything here ultimately is — because I’m not you and you’re not me and a single resolution is just a brick in the wall. And writing advice is mostly bullshit, anyway. I offered up a metric fuckload of resolutions in 2013. I had a lesser gaggle of resolutions in 2014. In 2015, I said that as a writer you should be... Read The Rest →

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