This month, I have inundated you with writing advice — specifically advice geared toward writing a novel, advice given in order to coincide with National Novel Writing Month (NaNoWriMo). It has been a mighty deluge, a briny flood of novelthink spraying from my fingertips as if from a high-pressure hose. Hopefully it did not burn your eyes. Or fill your lungs with its gargling nonsense.
To clarify, I maintain that writing advice — yes, mine included — is in no way universal, in no way absolute. Each snidbit (snippet + tidbit) of advice given is nothing more than a tool for your toolbox or a weapon in your armory: I expect you to pick it up, test its heft, estimate its value to your coming endeavor, and then either carry it forth onto the field for the purpose of crushing your enemy’s eggshell skulls or set it back in its case with a curt shake of your head. Sometimes it’s a “square peg meets circle hole” kind of thing. Other times it’s just what the doctor ordered.
It is strictly YMMV: “Your Monkey May Vacillate.”
No, wait, that’s not it.
Young Marmoset Make Vacuum?
Mmm. No. That feels wrong, too.
Your Mastectomy May Vary?
That feels closer.
I’m sure I’ll remember.
Also worth noting: my advice is purely selfish. I put it out there to help clarify my own process first and foremost because I secretly believe that I am the only occupant of this universe and you are all clearly figments of my caffeine-addled imagination. Writing is a weird journey, unique to each pilgrim walking its uncertain path. I’m just documenting the steps I’ve taken and pondering the steps I’ve yet to take.
(Yellow Machine Mumble Vicariously? Nnn, no. Damnit.)
Here, then, is a list of the blog posts I’ve written this month on the subject of writing a novel.
This list serves two purposes:
a) It is meant to be of some convenience for you penmonkeys, especially those of you still trundling along on the NaNoWriMo path. Maybe there’s something you missed? Make with the clicky-clicky.
b) It is meant to appeal to my laziest of sides because, hey, I don’t have to do a brand new blog post. I can just point and make hooting noises and jump up and down. It’s so easy. Besides, it’s Sunday, and I’ve got to head down yonder hills to take my lovely mother out to breakfast.
So, here’s that list.
(Yowling Mewling Marmot Vendor? Shit. No.)
And that’s all she wrote, cats and kittens.
(Your Mileage May Vary! Hahah! Haha! I did it! Woo! Do I get a prize?)