Cough Cough Hack Wheeze
I’m trying vigilantly to write up the epic trip report for the last two weeks of travel, but this cold keeps conspiring to get in my way. It has largely segued from “I think there’s a fist in my throat” to “It feels like I just swallowed a broken Coke bottle” to “IT LIVES IN MY FACE” to, at present, “I am coughing up lung goblins, and those lung goblins are building an army with which to destroy me.”
This makes sleeping really fun.
All that hacking. All the rumble-tumble of goblin drums.
It was a Friday night and I didn’t get to sleep until 4:30 in the morning. Awesome.
So, while I continue pecking away at this trip report, let us ponder (drum roll please) the cold remedy.
Everybody’s got one. Everybody has their own personal alchemical recipe that turns leaden phlegm into golden light. Some people have their own recipe for OTC meds (my current medication situation stands at: mint Cold-Eeze, Neti pot parties, Mucinex, Advil). But you also get people who have their own folksy remedies (“Reduce a pan of root beer and deer urine down to a thick syrup, then rub that sweet homemade sap onto your bare chest and upper lip, then wrap yourself in a roll of tinfoil and sleep under the full moon. That’s how you become a werewolf. I mean, cure a cold”).
So, I turn to you, my buzzing hive-mind.
Weirdest you’ve ever heard or tried?
What’s your go-to solution for kicking a cold out of your body?