I love these posts because they don’t require me to have theme or purpose. I brain-dump, and you all get a little on your shirt and pants. That’s good times, right there. Do you like these posts? Or do you hate them? Do you hate me? Do you think my ass looks fat in these jeans? Because I half-heartedly defended Dan Brown, do you want to slit my throat and lap at the gurgling blood as if feasting with sloppy licks at a water fountain? That’s okay. I accept that. On with the spew.

• I’m taking ideas for blog posts. Rather, I’m taking five ideas for blog posts. You give me a topic you want me to talk about, or a question you want me to answer, and I’ll take a day and do it. Maybe even next week, if you people are quick about it. Chop-chop.
• I love my iPhone, but the latest update has introduced some annoying little bugs. For instance: the sound will sometimes stop working, or email stops pushing to the phone. Turning the phone off and on does the trick, but, it’s still a real dick-bite. If anybody has advice, I’m all ears. Er, all eyes, since this is the Internet.
• We had a contest over at The Storyverse (coughcoughChapter9coughwheeze), and we decided to award two winners instead of one. One of those winners is a special gent who goes by the initials MCM. He’s a writer. He’s worth checking out. In fact, if I may recommend it, start by heading over to one of his fiction works, The Vector. It’s very readable on any screen, made even for mobile readers.
• Amazon keeps recommending more Walking Dead to me. Anyone else keeping up with it? I finished on…  Volume 8? Made to Suffer? The series turned a corner for me where it just became ceaselessly dark. Almost like it had to keep upping the death-and-disaster quotient, but I can only stomach that manner of escalation for so long. I feel like he could’ve explored other avenues of conflict, but… well. Anyway, the question is, do I bother picking up more? I think volumes 9 and 10 are out. Any other comics I should be reading? I’m taking suggestions.
• Speakacomics, why doesn’t Zuda have an iPhone app yet? Zuda. People. Fix that shiznoz.
• Speakaroleplayinggames (I know, nobody spoke of it, but do not ignore the voices inside my head): I now have copies of Eclipse Phase and eCollapse. The latter being by gaming superhero, Greg Stolze. The former being beautiful to look at, thanks in part to Adam Jury. Haven’t really had a chance to read either, yet, though, so comments will come later.
• Hey, look! Historic ammo shortage! Oooookay. I’m pro-gun, generally, and hey, if this corner of our economy is keeping people in jobs, cool. But let’s be clear, this is a little retarded. Dudes are stocking up — “I’m trying to get at least 1,000 rounds for each of my guns.” Jesus Christ. What does this guy plan on killing? All the deer in the county? A Chinese batallion? Congress? It cracks me up, the logic. “Obama’s more anti-gun than Clinton.” Except, he’s not. He’s been remarkably soft on gun control. He’s softer than I am on gun control, I think, and I like guns. When I went to a gun show… I guess it was back in December, it was amazing the way these guys were stirring panic over Obama’s incoming administration. “He’s gonna take away all your guns!” Except, that’s never going to happen. The most gun control you’re going to get is a ban on automatic weapons and maybe some greater restrictions on buying handguns. They assume it’s a slippery slope, though: “Once they take away my hand grenades, it won’t be long before they’re putting corks on all my steak knives and ripping out my teeth so I don’t get bitey!” The dumb thing is, these smacked-asses who are hoarding ammunition are keeping it out of the hands of regular sportsmen who just want a box of bullets to take hunting. If these geniuses were that concerned about the bullets being taken away, they should just buy reloading equipment. Asses.
• Some good new TV floating around out there. Glee continues to make me… uhhh, gleeful? Really. It’s super-good. It doesn’t flinch. Sure, it’s not The Wire or anything (a show that I have yet to see, by the way — feel free to throw things at my head in t-minus 3, 2, 1), but it actually approaches high school like I remember high school. Community, with Joel McHale, is another very clear winner. Really funny, but even better, it appears like it’s interested in character development and a little bit of drama. It’s more than just funny, is what I’m saying. Bored to Death on HBO is good, but not great. I’ll keep checking it out, seeing where it goes. Olivia Thirlby, though. That’s worth it. And on a later episode, Jim Jarmusch as himself? Okay. Yes.
• I have a bruise on my back that looks like someone whaled on my kidneys with a baseball bat. I’ll spare you the details, but let’s say it involves Chuck thinking he can play on playground equipment at his advanced age of 33. When he’s also wielding a dog on a leash.